Just thought I would pop in and say hello as I have not been visiting the forum very much in recent months. It is good to see the familiar names supporting "old friends" in the usual thoughtful and compassionate way.
Since my mother in law passed away nearly four months ago we have been through our ups and downs but are learning a new way of being. Father in law is lonely and that gives us guilty moments but he is "happy" in a strange way finding comfort from their home and their memories in that home together. We had a few uncomfortable weeks with an obsession over pictures of MIL in her coffin. I know, I found it macabre but we talked about it and FIL said he found it a comfort to wake up and see it next to his bed. We just accepted it although as you may imagine, my husband found it a struggle to come across it when going into the room to change the bed or fetch something. It is still there but the obsession with going through old photos and pulling out pictures to adorn the house is diminishing I think. I suppose grief comes out in different ways?
So where do we go from here? Life has changed and will keep changing I guess. We are starting to remember the good times and try to lock the bad times inside a little box to be put away - only to be dusted down when we feel strong. Maybe.
I wish you hope and strength for 2010. Keep up your great support for the others, you are brilliant!
Best wishes
nbfb
Since my mother in law passed away nearly four months ago we have been through our ups and downs but are learning a new way of being. Father in law is lonely and that gives us guilty moments but he is "happy" in a strange way finding comfort from their home and their memories in that home together. We had a few uncomfortable weeks with an obsession over pictures of MIL in her coffin. I know, I found it macabre but we talked about it and FIL said he found it a comfort to wake up and see it next to his bed. We just accepted it although as you may imagine, my husband found it a struggle to come across it when going into the room to change the bed or fetch something. It is still there but the obsession with going through old photos and pulling out pictures to adorn the house is diminishing I think. I suppose grief comes out in different ways?
So where do we go from here? Life has changed and will keep changing I guess. We are starting to remember the good times and try to lock the bad times inside a little box to be put away - only to be dusted down when we feel strong. Maybe.
I wish you hope and strength for 2010. Keep up your great support for the others, you are brilliant!
Best wishes
nbfb
