Hi all, Mum has reached the stage where she is not feeling safe in her flat. She believes that things are being stolen, moved around, etc. "where are my keys, they've taken my keys" is a source of extreme anxiety.
What I have done is put a little lock safe box on the wall with a combination lock (she cannot access) - she can see into the box and see her keys safely in there. She then says that it's no good - what if she needs to go out, go shopping, etc.
Understandable, from her point of view. But it's not safe for her to go out by herself. I tried giving her a dummy key but she quickly sussed out it didn't work in the lock.
I tell her that I'm sorry, I forgot the combination for the box at home and will sort it out next time.
Moreover, when I have given her a spare set, she will promptly loose them and call me in barely consolable hysterics saying they have been stolen. I do have remote beepers on the keys so they can be found but these can only be trigged when I'm in the flat.
It's a huge source of conflict - she feels like she's being locked in her flat which must be horrible and gets very angry with me. It's a puzzle I just cannot solve. I want her to feel she has a sense of autonomy but I need to keep her safe and I know giving her keys gives her to potential to go out by herself but will definitely lead to a panic for her when she inevitably hides them, can't find them, then believes someone has been in the flat and stolen them. Any ideas? Thanks in advance.
What I have done is put a little lock safe box on the wall with a combination lock (she cannot access) - she can see into the box and see her keys safely in there. She then says that it's no good - what if she needs to go out, go shopping, etc.
Understandable, from her point of view. But it's not safe for her to go out by herself. I tried giving her a dummy key but she quickly sussed out it didn't work in the lock.
I tell her that I'm sorry, I forgot the combination for the box at home and will sort it out next time.
Moreover, when I have given her a spare set, she will promptly loose them and call me in barely consolable hysterics saying they have been stolen. I do have remote beepers on the keys so they can be found but these can only be trigged when I'm in the flat.
It's a huge source of conflict - she feels like she's being locked in her flat which must be horrible and gets very angry with me. It's a puzzle I just cannot solve. I want her to feel she has a sense of autonomy but I need to keep her safe and I know giving her keys gives her to potential to go out by herself but will definitely lead to a panic for her when she inevitably hides them, can't find them, then believes someone has been in the flat and stolen them. Any ideas? Thanks in advance.