Is this the beginning of the end?

[Daisymay1]

Hi all
Mam was well settled in a lovely care home, but fell and broke her hip and after being in hospital for 6 weeks she now needs nursing care. She is now in a nursing home being assessed for 28 days but came out of hospital with thrush, conjunctivitis, dehydration and a refusal to eat, despite always having a healthy appetite.
I feel like she has gone down hill so quickly. She seems to have given up. Is this "normal"?
I just keep telling her I love her and trying to comfort her and she seems comfortable.
I suppose I am just coming to terms with things, but she can't last long if she is not eating or drinking.

 

[Gosling]

Hello @Daisymay1 . I am so sorry to hear what has been going on with your Mam. Sadly any fall/accident/ hospital stay can seem to make a person with dementia deteriorate quite quickly. This certainly can happen.
I would ask the nursing home manager and or GP what they consider the situation is with your Mum. Whatever, that is lovely that you keep telling her you love her. That is what I did with my dear Mum as she became unresponsive.
And if, and I do say if, they do suggest she is at end of life stage, please be prepared that this can go on for longer than you would think. It is amazing how long the body can continue without getting much/if any nutrition from any food and drink. Wishing you strength at this difficult time.

 

[Daisymay1]

Hello @Daisymay1 . I am so sorry to hear what has been going on with your Mam. Sadly any fall/accident/ hospital stay can seem to make a person with dementia deteriorate quite quickly. This certainly can happen.
I would ask the nursing home manager and or GP what they consider the situation is with your Mum. Whatever, that is lovely that you keep telling her you love her. That is what I did with my dear Mum as she became unresponsive.
And if, and I do say if, they do suggest she is at end of life stage, please be prepared that this can go on for longer than you would think. It is amazing how long the body can continue without getting much/if any nutrition from any food and drink. Wishing you strength at this difficult time.

Thank you so much for those kind words. It's one of those things, you know its going to happen, but you can't quite get your head around it.

 

[Christy21]

Hi all
Mam was well settled in a lovely care home, but fell and broke her hip and after being in hospital for 6 weeks she now needs nursing care. She is now in a nursing home being assessed for 28 days but came out of hospital with thrush, conjunctivitis, dehydration and a refusal to eat, despite always having a healthy appetite.
I feel like she has gone down hill so quickly. She seems to have given up. Is this "normal"?
I just keep telling her I love her and trying to comfort her and she seems comfortable.
I suppose I am just coming to terms with things, but she can't last long if she is not eating or drinking.

This sounds awful for both of you. I recently discovered that appetite is controlled by the brain and that part can die.
Best wishes- it’s a hard job.