1. Expert Q&A: Protecting a person with dementia from financial abuse - Weds 26 June, 3:30-4:30 pm

    Financial abuse can have serious consequences for a person with dementia. Find out how to protect a person with dementia from financial abuse.

    Sam, our Knowledge Officer (Legal and Welfare Rights) is our expert on this topic. She will be here to answer your questions on Wednesday 26 June between 3:30 - 4:30 pm.

    You can either post questions >here< or email them to us at talkingpoint@alzheimers.org.uk and we'll answer as many as we can on the day.

  1. janetruth

    janetruth Registered User

    Mar 20, 2007
    563
    nuneaton
    Time 8.50am. ( breakfast)
    Place Mums bedroom (she lives with us)
    Day Friday (but it doesn't matter, because now they are all the same)
    MUM ' I don't think that man who does my feet ( the chiropodist) can see very well, he must be older than me'
    ME, looking at her toenails and smiling,
    MUM 'He must be over 70' Pause ' how old am I'
    ME ' How old do you think you are'
    MUM ' Well I'm over 65' Pause ' 72'
    ME 'mum, today you can be 72'
    I give her a big hug and kiss on leaving the room, smile to myself and keep the happy memory that was just created for MY MEMORY BOX

    The man in question is probably younger than me (55) and Mum is 82

    This morning she said ' I hope I don't live to be 80 or 90 and a BLEADY NUISANCE to anyone' This deserved an even bigger 'hug and kiss'

    We have to see the funny side to all of this, laughter is the best medicine, I love to hear mum laughing at all the COMEDY DVDs we have now aquired since she has been with us.
    My wonderful partner plays domioes and card games with her and it always ends up with them doing more talking and laughung, than playing.

    Take car all. Bye for now.
    Janetruth x
     
  2. Taffy

    Taffy Registered User

    Apr 15, 2007
    1,314
    Hi Jane,laughter is certainly the best medicine my mum is 83 but always thinks she is older and thinks everyone else is older than her, she is waiting for her telegram from the queen because she thinks she may be 100 and often asks others have they got their telegram yet.It's good to be able to smile ! Best Wishes Taffy.
     
  3. Skye

    Skye Registered User

    Aug 29, 2006
    17,000
    SW Scotland
    Another coincidence!

    I was 'nobbled' to do a customer survey in our High Street chemist yesterday (where I was buying incontinence pants for John!)

    I answered all he questions without any trouble, until the end, when she said 'Do you mind me asking how old you are'?

    My mind went a complete blank, (and I'm supposed to be well), and I answered '63'. She said 'Gosh, you don't look it!' I'm actually 69!:eek:

    Compliment? Flattery? I don't care, it made me feel good!:)
     
  4. Natashalou

    Natashalou Registered User

    Mar 22, 2007
    426
    london
    age

    for several years now, mum has described herself as "nearly 80" . She doesnt know how old she is and when reminded soon forgets again, but as she was 79 yesterday for the next year at least I guess she will be 100% accurate!!
     
  5. Grannie G

    Grannie G Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 3, 2006
    68,722
    Kent
    My husband can never remeber how old he is unless he counts back to the year of his birth, 1932, and then adds on.

    But he took 4 years off my age, at the last count, and I aint complaining. ;)
     
  6. jenniferpa

    jenniferpa Volunteer Moderator

    Jun 27, 2006
    39,419
    My mother is one of the ones who consistently thinks she is much younger than she is, (she's 89) and consequently gets very frustrated that she can't do the things she thinks she should be able to do. Concurrently with that, she not unusually thinks I'm her elder sister, at which point she makes a stab at my age, and generally adds 10 years. You can imagine how that makes me feel :eek: I can't say it does a lot for your self-esteem to be told "you must be in your 60's now" when in fact you're 50, although there are days when I feel closer to 90. To be fair, she is still sufficiently on the ball to quickly add "not that you look it". :D On the whole I do correct her because of the distress that the frustration brings. When I tell her she's 89, she'll say "oh that really is quite old, no wonder I can't etc"

    Jennifer
     
  7. Margarita

    Margarita Registered User

    Feb 17, 2006
    10,824
    london
    My mother 76 , when I ask her how old she is ? she says 70 , not to far off :) . then adds is that old ? I say no , she says I wish I was younger , Don't we all :rolleyes:
     
  8. BeckyJan

    BeckyJan Registered User

    Nov 28, 2005
    18,972
    Derbyshire
    This morning my husband went through his ritual of working out his age - counting back to 1929 - then said I wish I could turn the clock back 20 yrs. Gosh I said - I would be living with my toy boy - that made him laugh.

    Its when he is not sure whether I am his wife or his mother I begin to look at myself in the mirror!!! Best wishes all Beckyjan
     
  9. Grannie G

    Grannie G Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 3, 2006
    68,722
    Kent
    BeckyJan, isn`t it strange? Both our husbands working out their age from the year of their birth. Must be something to do with long term memory.
     
  10. Skye

    Skye Registered User

    Aug 29, 2006
    17,000
    SW Scotland
    I'm afraid John's way beyond that now. He doesn't even know what a birthday is, let alone how old he is. Sad!:(
     
  11. BeckyJan

    BeckyJan Registered User

    Nov 28, 2005
    18,972
    Derbyshire
    Yes - but then David's maths ability has always been good. When that goes he really is 'down' the line (no need for MMSE tests then).

    The odd thing is he cannot work my age out from 1940!!! (much easier - but I think he has forgotton my birth year or mixes it up with his Mothers).

    (Does your hubby go through 'illusions of grandeur' - mine has always been very modest about his considerable achievements. Now because he has forgotton those he makes up his own idea of success! - some of them quite strange.) Perhaps this deserves a separate post at some time.

    Keep battling on Best wishes Beckyjan
     
  12. Grannie G

    Grannie G Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 3, 2006
    68,722
    Kent
    No. My husband does list all the things he was once able to do, like drive, cook, earn a living, etc. and rue their passing, but he`s quite accurate in what he was able to do.

    He still thinks he caould get a job, drive and cook, but `he can`t be bothered`.
     
  13. BeckyJan

    BeckyJan Registered User

    Nov 28, 2005
    18,972
    Derbyshire
    Oh Skye - what a sad post. So sorry - my heart goes out to you.
    I can only suggest you take the doggie for a walk or something - thats what I used to do (when we had a dog) when I felt truly sad and unhappy over this damned illness.

    Thinking about you as I pull out the weeds with vengeance.
    Beckyjan
     
  14. Grannie G

    Grannie G Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 3, 2006
    68,722
    Kent
    It`s very sad indeed Hazel. That`s the trouble. Plus the fact it could go on being so sad for years.
     
  15. Skye

    Skye Registered User

    Aug 29, 2006
    17,000
    SW Scotland
    BeckyJan, I've been planting my pots this afternoon. Skye was helping by making sure the compost was well aerated! She's black!!!:eek: Perhaps weeding would have been better. There are plenty to take my frustrations out on!

    Sylvia, you're right. When you consider how fit John is, it could go on for years. Can I?
     
  16. Lila13

    Lila13 Registered User

    Feb 24, 2006
    1,342
    When a fellow-patient in a waiting-room asked me how old my mother was, she said she was "22 and a half" (only knocking about 60 years off her age)
     

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