Like Selina it was a gradual thing over, in my case, about two and half years then full time for about another two and a half years. That probably makes me a novice at all this.
How long have you had responsibility for the person you care for (whether in a care home or not)? How old is the person now? If that is the past for you, how long was it?
I have been the sole caregiver for my mother for 7 years, first when she was living independently but needing increasing help, then for the last 2.5 years while she has been in assisted living. She's now 86, nearly 87.
After my father died in 2001 I discovered that Mum, then 76, had never written a cheque in her life, had no idea about finances at all or how to deal with anything that wasn't domestic related. So I tried to teach her how to balance her cheque book, but in hindsight the dementia was beginning then, so I was on a hiding to nothing. By the time we sold her house and moved her closer to us in warden controlled flat, I had to take her bank card as she was spending like it was going out of fashion, often making repeat buys as she'd forgotten she'd already bought it! I have cared for her ever since, albeit with carers coming in every day, till her death on New Years Day.
As well as that I was looking after my two grandchildren 3 days a week and my husband who had severe heart/lung problems. Now I just have the grandchildren, so it's rather a strange time for me just now. Grieving is exceedingly tiring.
Bigreader x
After my father died in 2001 I discovered that Mum, then 76, had never written a cheque in her life, had no idea about finances at all or how to deal with anything that wasn't domestic related. So I tried to teach her how to balance her cheque book, but in hindsight the dementia was beginning then, so I was on a hiding to nothing. By the time we sold her house and moved her closer to us in warden controlled flat, I had to take her bank card as she was spending like it was going out of fashion, often making repeat buys as she'd forgotten she'd already bought it! I have cared for her ever since, albeit with carers coming in every day, till her death on New Years Day.
As well as that I was looking after my two grandchildren 3 days a week and my husband who had severe heart/lung problems. Now I just have the grandchildren, so it's rather a strange time for me just now. Grieving is exceedingly tiring.
Bigreader x