Hello to everyone on TP.
I am desperate for advice. My OH is in care and has been for two and a half years. The home and the staff are very good. He does not talk very much but seems relaxed and always smiles and kisses me when I make my daily visit, I suppose you could say he is now at a stage in this illness where he just is. He is like a lovely child.
I know I should be thankful, I read the posts here and I know that we are fortunate to have come through so much, he was violent at one point and was sectioned, but now all seems calm.
The problem is that I cannot accept that he is 84 has dementia and it will not get better.
I am 12 years younger than him but I always see him in my mind at about 55, I expect one day to walk in the home and that's how he will be.
I just do not know what to do, I sleep badly, I think of him constantly, I just want back what I have lost and I know that is never going to happen.
I do go out with friends and try to rebuild some sort of a life, but it's not what I want, I just constantly cry, my heart aches and I'm scared, sometimes the pain feels too much to cope with.
I am sorry tobe such a misery but can anyone help?
I am desperate for advice. My OH is in care and has been for two and a half years. The home and the staff are very good. He does not talk very much but seems relaxed and always smiles and kisses me when I make my daily visit, I suppose you could say he is now at a stage in this illness where he just is. He is like a lovely child.
I know I should be thankful, I read the posts here and I know that we are fortunate to have come through so much, he was violent at one point and was sectioned, but now all seems calm.
The problem is that I cannot accept that he is 84 has dementia and it will not get better.
I am 12 years younger than him but I always see him in my mind at about 55, I expect one day to walk in the home and that's how he will be.
I just do not know what to do, I sleep badly, I think of him constantly, I just want back what I have lost and I know that is never going to happen.
I do go out with friends and try to rebuild some sort of a life, but it's not what I want, I just constantly cry, my heart aches and I'm scared, sometimes the pain feels too much to cope with.
I am sorry tobe such a misery but can anyone help?