1. Loris

    Loris Registered User

    Jan 30, 2008
    18
    Hi I am a new member. My mum is in hospital in an assessment ward which is a secure ward.The assessment has not been completed yet but the consultant has advised me to date mum has a moderate level of dementia which appears to be vascular.
    I am obviously trying to come to terms with this which is upsetting enough, but the events on the ward plus mums stories are causing me to be in floods of tears every day on the ward when I visit her.
    There is little or no conversation as my mum focuses entirely on events that are going on which now seems to be more imaginary than reality.
    The story that I got today was that there were people in her room removing babies from the woman's tummy and killing them.That one of the male nurses who she calls a policeman or a bus driver has been touching her breasts and her breasts were bleeding she says,which of course they were not,and that she had been given a bath and needles were vstuck into her arms.
    Can someone please help me to understand what is going on as this is extremely upsetting.
     
  2. Nell

    Nell Registered User

    Aug 9, 2005
    1,170
    Australia
    Dear Loris,
    How awful for you!
    There are other TPers with more experience of this who can give you better information than me.

    I think you should talk to her doctor about her medication - it may be that she needs something to help with these imaginings. Or, is it possible any new medication could be having bad side effects?

    Either way, I feel sure there should be some medical help available. As you say, this is a nightmare for your Mum and for you. I'm so sorry you have to suffer all this.
     
  3. Nebiroth

    Nebiroth Registered User

    Aug 20, 2006
    3,511
    Unfortunately your mum is no longer in touch with reality. She is in her reality now, where these things do happen.

    It is difficult to tell whether they are hallucinations (hearing or seeing things which are not real) or delusions (which are false beliefs).

    In either case they must be very distressing, but this is likely one reason why mum is in hospital being assessed.

    There are medications which may help.

    In the meantime all you can do is to offer reassurance or comforting.

    You are most unlikely to be able to convince mum that these things are not happening.
     
  4. Cloudwatcher

    Cloudwatcher Registered User

    Nov 2, 2007
    33
    West Sussex
    Dear Loris,

    My heart goes out to you at which must be an extremely distressing time for you. Hopefully the assessments will be quick and they will be able to get your Mum on to some medication which will alleviate these dreadful symptoms.

    My Mum had similar a few years back while in hospital for an operation. I know how frightening it can be for loved ones.

    Take care of yourself.

    Love Lee
     
  5. jenniferpa

    jenniferpa Volunteer Moderator

    Jun 27, 2006
    39,438
    Dear Lois this must be really awful for you.

    Something I wanted to add to the good advice you've already received: is it possible that some of these delusions are being triggered by TV? Many dementia sufferers seem to lose their ability to recognise that the TV is not real life and that can cause real problems.
     
  6. Loris

    Loris Registered User

    Jan 30, 2008
    18
    Thank you

    Thank you. The difficulty is that mum has only been like this since being admitted to this particular ward.The staff seem to think that there is very little change in mum's condition since admission as she does not communicate with them. It seems to be apparent that I am the only person that is being told these stories.
     
  7. Loris

    Loris Registered User

    Jan 30, 2008
    18
    Thanks Jennifer

    Thank you for your reply. Mum has stopped watching TV however this is mum that tells me this. I am finding it difficult to get any information from staff.
     
  8. Softy

    Softy Registered User

    Jan 25, 2008
    97
    West Yorkshire
    Hi Loris

    My Dad went through this stage he was convinced that he was at an airport and couldnt sleep for the planes taking off then it was babies crying all night and then men walking in and out of his room. I tried to understand where this was coming from, later Dads medication was changed and he settled. The stories are more upsetting for you than you mum. I know its hard cos I have been there but try and comfort yourself that your mum does not not have this distress all the time or she would be talking about it to the staff. This stage will pass or at least reduce in the meantime do try not to read too much into it.
     
  9. Taffy

    Taffy Registered User

    Apr 15, 2007
    1,314
    Dear Loris,

    These situations are very upsetting and my dad is the same at present... he is in hospital and last Monday he believed the nurses and doctors were trying to harm him.... in his struggle he has bad skin tears on his legs and arms.

    Dad being in poor health and his skin fragile prior to this...one leg needs skin grafts. Dad tells me to listen out for the staff while he tells me what actually happened....he was deliberately burned and he knows who done it...he has it all on tape.

    I can really relate to your stress and the untold misery this must cause them. I truly hope that your mum will overcome all this real soon. Take Care, Taffy.
     
  10. AJay

    AJay Registered User

    Aug 21, 2007
    123
    Leics
    Hi Loris

    I'm going through something similar just now with my Dad, it's horrible for him and I'm not sure how to cope with it.

    I can only send big hugs.

    AJay xxx
     
  11. Loris

    Loris Registered User

    Jan 30, 2008
    18
    Hi,
    A big thank you to everyone who replied. My mum has been commenced on Aricept so hopefully this will be beneficial to her. Anything is worth a try if it helps.
    It makes such a difference to hear that other people are in similar circumstances and like myself they are finding it difficlt to cope. I never thought for one minute that not coping was a term I would use or admit to.
    My heart goes out to some of you and I also send hugs and kisses.
    Although people with dementia are individuals and have different problems and are at different steps in their illness we as carers are united in our quest to ensure that we do the best that we can for our loved ones.
    Hopefully we can support each other through our difficult times by sharing laughter and tears.
    Thank you everyone.
    Loris
     
  12. fiona4

    fiona4 Registered User

    Feb 6, 2008
    7
    Southampton
    Hi

    I am sorry to hear you are having such an awful time. My Mother was admitted to this type of ward twice and both times were a disaster. After the last time she enterered an excellent specialised nursing home. Staff at the home have asked me if something very bad happened to my Mother while she was on the ward which confirmed my own suspicions. Obviously she was in no fit state to complain rationally herself but I share this with you only so that you maybe keep in mind that something may have happened. Sometimes people with Alzheimers use strange ways of describing what is happening and also their behaviour changes.

    It is unlikely that anything is happening but please don't discount the possibility, sadly these things do happen.

    Best wishes
    Fiona
     
  13. Natashalou

    Natashalou Registered User

    Mar 22, 2007
    426
    london
    My mother also went through this while in hospital this time last year. Electric monkeys were running around the room and I was hiding in parts of the hospital pulling faces at her among other things.
    She also became very aggresive and violent. Up til that period in hospital, she had been a somewhat confused and slightly awkward old lady..and I never DID get to the bottom of just what did cause such a radical change.
    I was told she "probably" had some sort of infection.
    however she was assessed by the EMI team and went on to Haliperidol which seemed to calm and stabilise her.
    She never went home and was discharged to a NH where she still is. She still makes a lot of strange statements which dont make much sense but arent so disturbing as they were before.
    I hope things get better soon
     
  14. BettyL

    BettyL Registered User

    Jan 20, 2008
    60
    Essex
    My mum was in the Mental Health Unit of the local hospital for 10 months last year and had very similar problems to your mum. She made some terrible allegations against some members of staff and other patients which were really upsetting. At first I took it all in and then I realised that not all the stories could possibly be true. Unfortunately though, having talked to other relatives and carers of patients, I think that there may have been some slight truths there. I made it known to the ward manager that I had some concerns, although I made no specific accusations. She was quite defensive but I felt I had to say something.

    Mum did calm down, although she now complains that people don't like her and she doesn't like this one or that one. Her likes and dislikes seem to change daily. I sometimes arrive at her new residential care home and she is having a garbled rant at some poor soul. She's only been there one month so I'm hoping she'll settle.

    The TV thing is a valid point. Mum doesn't bother with it anymore but I know when she did watch it, she was more confused.

    I don't want to depress you any further Loris but this terrible illness has changed my mum dreadfully - she was a quiet, shy, retiring lady and now she can be verbally aggressive and exceedingly stroppy. You just have to hang on in there and talk to the other carers and relatives on the ward - in my experience people in our situation are happy to help one another.

    Kindest regards
    Betty
     
  15. Loris

    Loris Registered User

    Jan 30, 2008
    18
    update on mum

    Hi Everyone,
    Thank you for your support. Mum has been commenced on Quetiapine for her hallucinations and paranoia. The consultant stated that the medication would not cure the symptoms but dampen them down.
    I visit mum every day and I was not seeing any improvement. The horror stories were a bit more bearable but the paranoia was much the same. The nurses are all witches, they do not care, Mum is not getting the same choice of food as the others she gets fed after the others and it may be mushrooms or dog poo. etc etc.
    Yesterday when I visited I was warned that mum was very angry and weepy. This is most upsetting as mum was never like that before this awful illness. She was angry at everyone yesterday including me but mum's illness is at the stage that she cannot let anyone know what the problem is because of course the problem is in her mind.
    Mum had been crying yesterday and she has rubbed her eye and unfortunately she has burst a blood vessel however she has accused one of the male patients of punching her in the face.
    UPSETTING UPSETTING.
    Unknown to me her Quetiapine has been increased.
    Mum has to go for a nipple biopsy either an overnight stay or as a day patient so I am unsure as to how to handle that one.Does anyone have experience of this? as I am sure that mum will think that she is being murdered.
    The case review is today but it has alredy been said that mum will go into a care home.
    Apologies for ranting on but we are all caring for loved ones who have dementia and I think we all find comfort in a bit of support.
    Loris
     
  16. Skye

    Skye Registered User

    Aug 29, 2006
    17,000
    SW Scotland
    Dear Loris

    You sound so distressed, and I can understand that. It must be hard to see your mum in such a state.

    I'm sorry, I can't offer any advice, as John has a diferent type of dementia, but I just wanted to send you a hug.

    Love,
     

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  17. hendy

    hendy Registered User

    Feb 20, 2008
    506
    West Yorkshire
    Loris
    I am sorry mum and you are going through such a horrible time. All I can say is that my dad suffers from Vas Dem and experienced very distressing halluciantions and paranoid thoughts. He believed he was in a concentration camp and patients were being taken out to be gased. He could describe 'armies' of spiders and insects marching around the floor. I could go on and on. the thing is that these really acute phases can pass and these symptoms can be treated and managed. My dad still experiences hallucinations and we manage them by reassurance, (he can no longer take anti psychotic meds.) I found nursing staff really supportive and helpful re this.Not only was my dad very distressed, but this was unbelievably upsetting for me at the time i just couldn't understand it. Over time I have realised that there may have been a real physical cause to these. They are also triggered by anxiety and stress and sometimes talking through can be reassurance enough. Hope this is some help at this difficult time.
    very kindest regards
    hendy
     
  18. toura

    toura Registered User

    Feb 5, 2008
    42
    hertfordshire
    hi mum went throw this stage to and i do belive its the tv once i vist mum at one in the morning cause i couldnt sleep there she was watching tv they had a sex progrome on after this she starting saying she been attact she said they stuck it up her this was very upsetting iv have got mum home now and she doesnt say anymore about this so its the tv
     

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