help! mum shutting down

[hancmont]

I just visited my mum in her care home today and was so shocked and upset to see how frail she is.She has been refusing food, drink (except small sips of bottled water) and meds over the past 3 weeks and has dropped so much weight, she is down to just 5 stone! The carers have tried everything, from cooking her favourite foods, to actually going to the supermarket and buying her specific canned drinks when she's asked for them. She often asks for stuff then either takes just one fork full and says she's had enough or most of the time just leaves it outside her room. She just spends most of the time on her bed, muttering to herself that someone is having a party in her flat and that all the food is poisoned. She refuses any form of PC and has been wearing the same top and trousers for weeks. She is adamant that the clothes in the wardrobe aren't hers. She has had a mental health assessment and they seem to think it's a bit of a stand off because she doesn't want to be in the CH burt that doesn't give us a solution to this dilemma. It is soul destroying to see my poor mum like this and we don't know where to go from here? any suggestions?

 

[chickenlady]

help Mum shutting down

Are you able to take her out for an outing for an hour? She might be more willing to eat if she is in a different environment. Imagine that you believe people are trying to poison you, if you go into a different setting you might feel safer. This paranoia might be due to urinary tract infection or advancing of her condition. Try taking her out to a quiet courtyard or garden and conspiring with her to "sneak" some chocolate," whilst no one is watching". Good luck, get care home staff to test her wee.

 

[Patricia Alice]

I just visited my mum in her care home today and was so shocked and upset to see how frail she is.She has been refusing food, drink (except small sips of bottled water) and meds over the past 3 weeks and has dropped so much weight, she is down to just 5 stone! The carers have tried everything, from cooking her favourite foods, to actually going to the supermarket and buying her specific canned drinks when she's asked for them. She often asks for stuff then either takes just one fork full and says she's had enough or most of the time just leaves it outside her room. She just spends most of the time on her bed, muttering to herself that someone is having a party in her flat and that all the food is poisoned. She refuses any form of PC and has been wearing the same top and trousers for weeks. She is adamant that the clothes in the wardrobe aren't hers. She has had a mental health assessment and they seem to think it's a bit of a stand off because she doesn't want to be in the CH burt that doesn't give us a solution to this dilemma. It is soul destroying to see my poor mum like this and we don't know where to go from here? any suggestions?

Hi Hancmont,

This is very much the same as we are experiencing right now. Mum is not even drinking the Ensure plus now (thinks its poisoned), she is losing weight rapidly. She loved her cup of tea with a biscuit, but not now, it is as if it tastes awful and the faces she pulls and spits it out. She has even taking to throwing drinks, today I got drenched with a milkshake then her squash.

I am afraid I have no answers either, we have tried taking her to our homes and giving her tomato soup but even that makes her feel sick.

I hope we both find a solution soon.

Best wishes.

 

[hancmont]

Are you able to take her out for an outing for an hour? She might be more willing to eat if she is in a different environment. Imagine that you believe people are trying to poison you, if you go into a different setting you might feel safer. This paranoia might be due to urinary tract infection or advancing of her condition. Try taking her out to a quiet courtyard or garden and conspiring with her to "sneak" some chocolate," whilst no one is watching". Good luck, get care home staff to test her wee.

yes we've tried to take her out but she refuses. We tried bringing in her favourite Chinese food takeaway but again she said it was poisoned. She barely leaves her room except sometimes just to look out of her door (which leads onto the main living room), to see who is talking - she is paranoid that everyone is talking about her and that no-one likes her. The CH test residents urine regularly for UTI's but as mum is drinking very little, she obviously goes to the toilet less and less so it's been difficult lately for the carers to get a sample. Thanks for the advice anyway

 

[hancmont]

Hi Hancmont,

This is very much the same as we are experiencing right now. Mum is not even drinking the Ensure plus now (thinks its poisoned), she is losing weight rapidly. She loved her cup of tea with a biscuit, but not now, it is as if it tastes awful and the faces she pulls and spits it out. She has even taking to throwing drinks, today I got drenched with a milkshake then her squash.

I am afraid I have no answers either, we have tried taking her to our homes and giving her tomato soup but even that makes her feel sick.

I hope we both find a solution soon.

Best wishes.

I am sorry to hear about your mum, we too have had many a drink thrown across a room or poured down the toilet. I think it is part of this awful disease. If I make any break throughs I'll let you know. xxx

 

[jorgieporgie]

Hi Hancmont,
My Mum isn't in a CH she lives with me, but the past couple of weeks she has refused food and spits it out. The GP said it could be side effects of the meds she is on. I don't think it is, I think it is the next stage in this disease.
Mum isn't paranoid or anything just doesn't like food at the moment, she is still drinking though.
Obviously if your Mum isn't drinking something needs to be done, or she may end up going I hospital for dehydration
Hope everything turns out ok for you.