Help, Advice, Support Medway (Kent)


Registered User
Jun 24, 2007

I'm Martyn, new to this site. It seems such are great site with lots of useful information. Thanks.

My reason for joining is to do with my Grandmother(80). She is showing many symptoms of Alzheimers however its proving hard to get some sort of person or specialist to assess her.

Today my grandparents were round for sunday roast however later in the day she seemed to get confused. She thought that my family was in her home and that the children were playing with her things. This scared my children as she become very demanding telling them not to touch and that she was going to get the deeds to the hose to prove it was hers.

My granfather also 80 lives with my grandmother and is finding it hard. Most evenings she will wake up 3am not knowing who he is and screaming at him to get out her house! She also somtimes get out the house late at night and my grandfather is not aware, wandering around the streets.

It seems that to get help it has been a slow and tedious task. It hard for my grandfather to talk to anyone as she always asks "Who are you talking to?", "Why are we going there?". After visiting their GP he refered them to a specailist who said she was fine! Since then my grandfather has had the emergency doctor out (took 1hour) as she was screaming and being violent. Information was passed to their GP and a specailist is ment to come and assess her again! This was about 2-3 weeks ago.

Does the above sound like Alzheimers?

My grandfather mentions that she seems to get worse around 5pm onwards? Is this normal?

Other than chasing the GP is there someone whom we can contact to speed up this process?

Any help or advice would be grateful. Today is the first time that I have seen my grandmother like this and it is quite upsetting. Its even harder for my grandfather. I try and visit once a week but this isnt always possible.

Many thanks,



Registered User
Jun 27, 2006
Hi and welcome to TP.

Firstly, I need to mention that none of us in the forum are qualified to make a diagnosis as such, although we can speak about things that seem familiar. While there may be many causes of dementia, what you are describing seems very similar to something that is called "sundowning" which is a classic AD symptom (although it may be common with other types of dementia). An increased restlessness seems to come on people as the evening approches (hence the name). Failing to recognise your nearest and dearest is also reminiscent of Capgras Syndrome, although that appears to be more consistent than your grandmother is displaying.

In no way, shape or form could what your grandparents are going through be considered normal. A lot of us have problems getting a diagnosis when the only symptom is a little memory loss but not getting a diagnosis in your situation seems ridiculous. It can take time though. All you can really do is hound the GP. If she performs well on memory tests it may not be AD (although it maybe) so they need to do further investigations. I'm afraid some GP's will let this slide so you have to be proactive.

Best wishes



Registered User
Apr 15, 2007
Hello Martyn, welcome to TP sorry to read of your situation I can offer no advise
about diagnosis as I'm from Australia, but I can tell you that some dementia
suffers do display the symptoms you describe. My mum is 83 and has alzheimers
but never suffered from "sundowning" (she is more like a chook she goes to bed
when the sun goes down and gets up with the first ray of light) but other
sufferers can be quite difficult. I hope for all your sake that something gets sorted
real quick, and I think you are great to give support to your grandparents.
I wish you all well. Taffy.

Grannie G

Volunteer Moderator
Apr 3, 2006
Martyn21 said:
". After visiting their GP he refered them to a specailist who said she was fine! Martyn
Dear Martyn, all I can suggest is you see your GP and ask for a referral to another specialist for a second opinion.

It is obvious from your post, that your grandmother is far from fine.

Take care


Registered User
May 14, 2006
Dear Martyn,
We also live in North Kent, near to Medway and when my mother started having vivid hallucinatons one afternoon, we made an emergency appointment with her GP in an after hours surgery at 6.30pm. When he saw how distressed she was, he gave her some medication and arranged for a specialist doctor from the Centre (where The Piano Man was treated) to come and see her at home. Mum was prescribed Haliperidol and Citalopram, which seemed to help for a while.
My mother had Vascular Dementia, which could be controlled by medication, so she seemed reasonably content. The ordinary family GPs aren't qualified to treat mental health problems, but they can refer patients to consultants who work in centres attached to hospitals. Your GP could refer your grandmother to the centre near the QE2 Bridge or there are probably other places nearer to the Medway area.
Emergency help and assessment seems to be very quick and effecient, although the help from Social Workers was extremely slow and not much use to Mum.
I think the symptoms of dementia can vary a great deal from person to person and there are other conditions which can also cause similar problems, so some kind of diagnosis is important.
I think you do need to insist on a referral to a consultant as soon as possible.
I hope you manage to get some help sorted out soon.


Registered User
Jun 24, 2007


Thanks for your help and advice. I'm hoping that we get a 2nd opinion very soon. I'll keep you all posted.

I have spoken to the Alzheimers help line and they too mention a 2nd Opinion.

thanks again.