Hello, I'm new to this

[zesty]

I have loads of questions, so I thought I'd join.
My mum was diagnosed after a fall in May, when her previously slight dementia changed overnight to quite progressed. She stayed in hospital until a care home place was found in August.
My brother who lived with her, has early onset Parkinson's disease ,was diagnosed at 45 {now 64} Since mum went into care he had bad hallucinations and confusion, went into hospital in September and now diagnosed with dementia. He is now waiting for a nursing home place.
Feels like i've lost both of them.
My mum talks a lot but seems to be stuck in a time when my children were little, they're all grown up, and I don't know if them visiting her is advisable, the last thing I want to do is upset her.
Does anyone have advice?

 

[yoy]

Goodness, you've had a bit of a year with both of them being diagnosed. You have my sympathies.
I'm not sure what to suggest re your children visiting but I'm sure others will be along with their experiences. I can only say that my mum was recently visitied by her grand-daughter (now grown up), and sadly mum didn't seem to recognise her as such because she has also gone back to a time when she thinks the kids were little. She did however keep looking at her grand-daughter as though she knew her somehow but just couldn't work out how. So she wasn't upset by it. I also remember this happening to me with my auntie when she was in her care home years ago. She kept looking at me in a puzzled fashion, so I obviously meant something to her, she just wasn't sure how.

 

[northumbrian_k]

Hi @zesty and welcome to Dementia Support Forum our friendly and helpful community of people who have experience of many aspects of dementia. I am sorry to hear about your situation. Whatever questions you have, our members will try to help. Picking up what @yoy has said, from my experience people with dementia can become confused in terms of time, place and person. Sometimes they may seem to know a person and understand their relationship. At other times they may be uncertain. You children are grown up and should be able to adapt to this. If your mum would get enjoyment from their company it will not matter if she doesn't know exactly who they are.

 

[zesty]

Thank you, your advice is invaluable. X