1. SuzyB

    SuzyB Registered User

    Jan 4, 2008
    2
    Hi everybody. My dear dad has just been diagnosed with Alzheimers. He is 86. I live 130 miles away and I am his only child. It really hurts that I can't be there to help him and mum as much as I'd like. They do have good friends and neighbours around them though. I just wanted to feel there was somebody out there who understood. SuzyB
     
  2. KenC

    KenC Registered User

    Mar 24, 2006
    913
    Co Durham
    Hi Suzy

    Welcome to Talking Point. One thing about this site is that there is always some one here who is in a similar position to you, and will always try to help you out if they can.
    You are among friends.

    Best Wishes

    Ken
     
  3. Grannie G

    Grannie G Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 3, 2006
    69,884
    Kent
    Hello Suzy, welcome to TP.

    It must be hard for you to be so far away from your parents. I hope your mother has had good advice about getting the help she will need.

    And yes Suzy, all of us who are here, know and understand.

    Love xx
     
  4. Skye

    Skye Registered User

    Aug 29, 2006
    17,000
    SW Scotland
    Hi Suzy, and welcome.

    It's hard to know what to do when you're so far away, and it must be upsetting not to be able to spend as much time with your mum and dad as you like.

    The best thing you can do is to ring regularly and let your mum know that you're there to support her. She must be very scared, although it's good that she's got supportive friends and neighbours.

    But she needs you most of all.

    And you need support too, so come on here any time you want to talk, we're always here for you.
     
  5. SuzyB

    SuzyB Registered User

    Jan 4, 2008
    2
    Thanks everyone

    I feel a lot better already. Thanks for replying so quickly. It feels good to be among such caring people. SuzyB
     
  6. Lynne

    Lynne Registered User

    Jun 3, 2005
    3,433
    Suffolk,England
    Hi Suzy

    Just chiming in with another welcome.

    My own mum is 88, formally diagnosed about 18 months ago, so I have some idea of how you must be feeling. It's a worrying, anxious time. Once you've made sure he's got all the support available locally, you can really only take things a day at a time. Apart from the sort of daycare available through social services, Age Concern also do quite a lot of daycare groups, including those tailored for dementia sufferers. May be worth enquiring about.
    Phone often (there may come a time when the use of the phone is beyond him), say all the things we Brits are usually so reserved about expressing out loud, take photos on good days, send little cards & notes if he can still read (my mum's eyesight is going, so she can't - not directly related to dementia, wet macular degeneration).

    And don't forget to come back here often. The accumulated knowledge & experience found here far exceeds that of the medics. Talking Point is a sanity saver.

    Best wishes
     
  7. gigi

    gigi Registered User

    Nov 16, 2007
    7,788
    East Midlands
    Welcome!

    Hello Suzy,

    Lots of support here-you are supporting your mum and dad..but you will get support here for yourself on TP.
    We were all "new here" once..myself not so long ago. It's a good place to be for many reasons.:)
    Wishing you well

    Love Gigi x
     

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