Hiya please can someone advise what we can do. My MIL has mid stage DLB and Vascular. She needs carers 2hrs per day and her husband is refusing carers saying they can't afford it and absolutely not happening. She has more than enough money to cover her care not requiring his contribution. He constantly rings us saying he can't cope and help but flips the next day saying everything is managed. MIL has hallucinations and episodes every night sometimes up to 5am. She needs constant mental stimulation and he doesn't even do that! We are at the end of our tether as this has been 8 months of him changing his mind. Can he be reported for not allowing carers in? Thank you 😊
Hello and HELP!
- Thread starter Petal705
- Start date
Wow, just wow, big question.
Sounds like he needs checking out too for a mental health condition.
Men can cope, been on here for over 10 years caring for mum and wife, but I was never too proud to accept help and to be fair it was offered but I never felt I needed it.
Phoning and saying he can't cope then denying he made the call...well it doesn't sound good. Money side of things, well it gets complicated about her/their money when it comes to paying for care, probably best to contact your local AZ society or ageuk where you can get face to face advise and talk numbers on a way we can't really do on here. K
Sounds like he needs checking out too for a mental health condition.
Men can cope, been on here for over 10 years caring for mum and wife, but I was never too proud to accept help and to be fair it was offered but I never felt I needed it.
Phoning and saying he can't cope then denying he made the call...well it doesn't sound good. Money side of things, well it gets complicated about her/their money when it comes to paying for care, probably best to contact your local AZ society or ageuk where you can get face to face advise and talk numbers on a way we can't really do on here. K
Welcome to Dementia Support Forum @Petal705. I too would be concerned that your MIL's husband may also have dementia. Certainly his behaviour doesn't sound very logical. It might be a good idea to write to their GP and ask if he can be called in for a well man check. As for not allowing the carers in, who decided they were needed? If it was social services get back to them and explain what is happening. It may well be worth calling SS anyway as they sound like two vulnerable adults in need of support.
It might be an idea to call the support line tomorrow and discuss options with them.
www.alzheimers.org.uk
This is a very friendly and supportive forum, and I'm sure others will be along soon with their ideas.
It might be an idea to call the support line tomorrow and discuss options with them.
Dementia Support Line
If you need dementia support, we’re here for you. Get personalised information, support and advice by calling us on 0333 150 3456.
www.alzheimers.org.uk
Wow, thank you all so much for your advice I really appreciate it. The Mental health team are still involved and we report everything to them. We're currently waiting for the CPN to get back to us. The Psych Dr and CPN advised that MIL needs carers in daily and visit Day Centres etc. We have both thought he may possibly have dementia too. I'll contact the support line today. Thank you again 💓
