It's hitting me now, Dad is only having spoons of food and fluid. He may perk up again, he has in the past. You will all understand the ups and downs of dementia and will know exactly how I feel when things are bad, I feel like the end is on its way for real this time. I have hope that he will live, but what for?? To stay in a bed, wearing a nappy. My Dad left me in November but I can still look at him, even though he is skin and bone, but we still get that glimmer now and then. That's me being selfish though, still wanting him here. I still feel so bad that I have spoke with Consultant and sort end of life meds, but I know full well thay is to help him and put him at peace. Talk about Jekyll and Hyde! Crying alot today. Feel rubbish.