goodbye,

Rose2008

Registered User
Feb 19, 2008
7
uk
My father died this week. It was peaceful and surrounded by love. I've been very busy sorting things out for the funeral, but I am finding it hard to bear. I want to tell everyone I meet "My dad's died" and it seems odd that the world goes on in an ordinary way. I feel sick to my stomach and afraid I won't be able to cope. It all seems too much.
Rose
 

TinaT

Registered User
Sep 27, 2006
7,095
Bolton
Dear Rose,

I'm so very sorry for your loss. I lost my wonderful dad 10 years ago. Grieving is a hard process and takes a long time but each month the pain will soften a little. I still miss him terribly but am now able to look back on my life with him and be happy for all the good times we had. I will always be grateful for the unstinting love he showed me and for teaching me to look beneath the surface of a person to see if there is goodness hidden away somewhere.

xxTinaT
 

ishard

Registered User
Jul 10, 2007
98
Rose love I do know how you feel as I too suddenly lost my Dad (he was Mums carer at the time and it wore him out :( ) and wanted to tell everyone I met that he had died.
I do remember looking around just after we came out of the hospital and thinking 'But everything looks the same?'

Thinking back I now wonder if that was because I wanted reassurance or I just couldnt believe it.

The way I got through all the arrangements and the funeral was to think to myself that it was the very last thing I could do for him so it better be right.

I ran around like a mad thing making the arrangements and making sure Mum and everyone was ok that I didnt even start to grieve untill after the funeral, please dont do that as it hit me later very hard.

Make time for yourself to grieve and remember the good times not the end.

Lots of love

Jackie
 

Skye

Registered User
Aug 29, 2006
17,000
SW Scotland
I want to tell everyone I meet "My dad's died" and it seems odd that the world goes on in an ordinary way. I feel sick to my stomach and afraid I won't be able to cope. It all seems too much.

Rose, love, I know that feeling too. How can the world just carry on as normal, when my own particular world has collapsed?

But you will cope.

Maybe not as well as usual, maybe not as well as you would like, but you will cope.

Allow yourself to grieve. Give yourself some quiet times when you can sit and remember your dad, and cry as much as you want to. We all throw ourselves into 'arrangements' after a bereavement, and it's onle afterwards that the loss hits us like a ton of bricks, and can knock us flat.


I ran around like a mad thing making the arrangements and making sure Mum and everyone was ok that I didnt even start to grieve untill after the funeral, please dont do that as it hit me later very hard.
Please take jackie's advice, it's very good.

Just give yourself time.

Love,
 

Grannie G

Volunteer Moderator
Apr 3, 2006
70,643
Kent
Dear Rose,
I`m so sorry for the loss of our father and understand why you want everyone to know. I hope it was some consolation for you to believe he died peacefully.
Love xx
 

frederickgt

Registered User
Jun 4, 2005
124
92
Hornchurch,Essex
Goodbye

Dear Rose,I know how you feel,my wife died Jan 14th,one week after her 74th birthday,I miss her so much,but,I am comforted in the knowledge that she is no longer confused,or in pain,but is with her family in a better place,be happy for her,remember it is not Good Bye,but Au revoir!
L:eek:ve from fred.
 

BeverleyY

Registered User
Jan 29, 2008
716
Ashford, Kent
Dear Rose

Sorry to hear of your loss.

I lost my Mum 6 weeks ago, and I still want to tell everyone... I still think at times it cannot be real because the world is still spinning.

I am cheesed off it is Mother's Day tomorrow - don't they realise we don't all have mothers? I just phoned someone who said, I can't come in the morning, I'm visiting my Mum'. I replied sharply, 'so am I, but sadly mine is in the cemetery!'. I wish I hadn't felt so bitter, but I couldn't help myself.

Life is different, it won't ever be the same.:(

You will have good days, bad days and very bad days - but, you will cope - I promise you that.

Take care.

Beverley x
 

gigi

Registered User
Nov 16, 2007
7,788
66
East Midlands
Dear Rose,

So sorry to hear about your dad..

Take some comfort in the fact that it was peaceful and he was surrounded by love..

I know how you're feeling..my own father died almost 4 years ago..I still miss him..always will..

But the raw sorrow of these early days of grieving will fade, and be replaced by happier memories.

Wishing you and your family well..

Love Gigi x
 

Nell

Registered User
Aug 9, 2005
1,170
68
Australia
Dear Rose,
My deepest sympathies on the loss of your beloved father. It is so hard to lose a dearly loved parent. May you take time to grieve and allow yourself time to come to terms with the loss. His peaceful passing is a blessing, although it may be hard to se it in that light at present.
Thinking of you.
 

Taffy

Registered User
Apr 15, 2007
1,314
Dear Rose,

Sorry for the loss of your dad

may your memories of the peace

and love that surrounded him

bring some comfort.

Deepest Sympathy,

Love Taffy.