Going into a home

[swood]

I have recently had a stroke and been in hospital 4 days .I've been caring for my husband at home so he has had to go into respite. His behaviour has got much worse very quickly and my daughter's have had to call out rapid response team .he will also going to be assessed by ss .I am so upset with this change and feel guilty but I also feel ill and can't look after him .the home think it would be the worst thing at the moment to go and see him but I am very distressed to think of him being so upset .Has anybody had this experience ? And any advice ?

 

[nae sporran]

Sorry @swood, the stress on you and your family must be hard at the moment. I have no advice for you and just hope you make a good recovery.

 

[FBradshaw]

I have recently had a stroke and been in hospital 4 days .I've been caring for my husband at home so he has had to go into respite. His behaviour has got much worse very quickly and my daughter's have had to call out rapid response team .he will also going to be assessed by ss .I am so upset with this change and feel guilty but I also feel ill and can't look after him .the home think it would be the worst thing at the moment to go and see him but I am very distressed to think of him being so upset .Has anybody had this experience ? And any advice ?

The kindest thing to do is speak to your husbands doctor and consider some anti anxiety medication for him. It’s all about ‘quality of life’ for you both. If medication would help him relax then you will relax and aid your recovery. I am a mother of a son with autism and a daughter of a mother with Alzheimer’s, medication for anxiety has enabled us all to cope so much better

 

[charlie10]

Hello @swood.....I'm sorry to hear about your ill health, it must be very difficult dealing with the worry of your husband on top of it.....hopefully you will find the forum a good place to get advice and to put out your worries . I don't have personal experience of placing a family member in a CH but I have seen lots of advice about not visiting for a week or two to let them settle in. Perhaps you could be guided by the CH staff and use the respite to concentrate on your own recovery too. I'm sure there will be lots of people with more experience coming on to comment too

 

[swood]

The kindest thing to do is speak to your husbands doctor and consider some anti anxiety medication for him. It’s all about ‘quality of life’ for you both. If medication would help him relax then you will relax and aid your recovery. I am a mother of a son with autism and a daughter of a mother with Alzheimer’s, medication for anxiety has enabled us all to cope so much better

thankyou , The doctor has suggested this and I hate the thought but I agree it might ease both our health situations.