I just wanted to ask for people's experiences of children meeting up to decide how to meet a parent with dementia's care needs when things deteriorate. I am, I suppose, the main carer for my mother (and have finance POA) and am starting to think that she may be better cared for now in residential care than continuing to live at home alone. She has had respite stays which have gone well. I have suggested to my siblings that we meet and discuss the issues (without mum present as she is no longer capable of making that sort of decision). I can see that the three of us may have differing views and I would like us all to make our points without it developing into a slanging match, and hopefully we can reach some decision that we can all support to some extent. Issues that I see arising are money (she has some but it will run low quite quickly if residential care costs are paid); her house (this has been in trust to the three of us for many years but I am wondering if we should try and rent it out to help stretch out care payments); the small sum of money that she gifts to each of us each month (this has been in place since our father died many years ago) and the money that she continues to give us for birthdays etc - I have continued this in the way it has been for many years but I guess it will stop if she goes into care, and whether she really needs residential care given some of the above factors. I was wondering whether a 'go between' or chairperson might be an idea but am a bit at a loss about how to find someone objective! Your experiences please!