Hi
Just off loading-apology in advance
Mum moved from residential to the dementia unit in April this year because of safe guarding issues around lots of (mainly staged) falls and trips to a&e.
The idea being she gets a lot more supervision as staff ratio higher. Her friend from residential (no dementia- has diabetes and mobility issues) can go over for coffee,and in the evening mum was taken back to residential for the scrabble group.
Today I arrived at 1045am and was told she was in the residential lounge with her friend.
I went in,greeted everyone (2 residents on their own, 2 that I hadn't seen with visitors).
She wasn't in a brilliant mood. Said her hearing aid didn't work-I sorted it out the tube was blocked.
Her friend said mums knitting bag gone missing.
Mum looked at the treats bag I take with me then told me she needed me to water her plants. I asked if she wanted her treats took to her room,told yes. I said I'd look for her knitting bag.
I went to her room ,the bag had been put on her bookcase,probably above her eyeline.
I spoke to a carer when I put her puds in the fridge,and mentioned mum seemed to think she was back in residential,and was quite agitated. Carer said she 'comes back for meals' which seemed to imply mum is spending g a lot of her time in residential.
I went back,walked in saying I'd found her bag.Was told I was shouting,but I think she had turned hearing aid right up.
She ranted accusing me of hiding the bag/ how dare I go in her room/ etc.
I crouched down in front of the wheelchair she is using,and quietly reminded her she had asked me to go and water the plants etc.
She was shouting,and one of the new residents started having a bit of a go at her saying 'she always causes trouble' (I hadnt seen him before)
His vision then started telling him to stop interfering .
Mum was saying I'm interfering and wants me to go. I agreed,but asked her to calm down a bit as she was disturbing everyone.
She tried to get the wheelchair to run into me,but this one had brakes on the back so she couldn't move it.
The resident arguing back at her now had his wife telling him,quite loudly,to stop interfering.
I told mum I'd get some one for her and she suddenly leant foward and tried to 'stab' me with the pair of knitting needles that were in her ball of wool.She missed, and I removed the bag from her reach and went for help.
As I went into the dinning room,I saw a carer from the dementia unit walking towards me.
I said mum was kicking off,she was still arguing with the other resident. She said mum was shouting but so had I been-she hadn't been in the room,or indeed the dinning room when I'd gone through a few minutes before. I said I'd raised my voice a little when accused of mumbling,but that mum was intact arguing with a resident now.
I said she had started when I'd given her the bag of knitting as had lost it. The carer said mum couldn't have lost it as had been knitting Friday . I answered her friend Ruth had to,d me she had given mum her spare needles and some wool and that mums red bag hadn't been with her since about wed.
I went back and got my stuff and left. The carers went in and I could here mum rowing with them
I sat in the car to calm down,and I saw the carer who'd said I'd been shouting in the smoking patio.
I went over and gave her the bag of treats I'd inadvertently picked up when I left. I said if I was the cause of mums upset I'm not visiting unless someone else is with me. I told her they still needed to chase up physio for mum to be issued with her own chair,and that I'd rung three times this week,but only got an answerphone.
The carer said she would tell the senior on the dementia unit 'what had happened and let her sort it all out'.
I left feeling I was being reprimanded for mum trying to stab me with her needles and for doing as asked by going to her room.
We were told,after the safe guarding complaint end of April that she needed to be in the dementia unit as there were more staff on hand to help and sit with her etc if she is upset.
It is also quieter over there, with a pleasant enclosed garden they can use.
If mum is spending most of her time back on residential,she isn't being checked up on as regularly.
She may not be taking her meds.correctly as often secretes in her top denture and then spits out.
All in all,if I'd let her stab me,maybe they would have had to section her and I wouldn't be feeling so sh...y and fed up
Sorry for long winded rant
Just off loading-apology in advance
Mum moved from residential to the dementia unit in April this year because of safe guarding issues around lots of (mainly staged) falls and trips to a&e.
The idea being she gets a lot more supervision as staff ratio higher. Her friend from residential (no dementia- has diabetes and mobility issues) can go over for coffee,and in the evening mum was taken back to residential for the scrabble group.
Today I arrived at 1045am and was told she was in the residential lounge with her friend.
I went in,greeted everyone (2 residents on their own, 2 that I hadn't seen with visitors).
She wasn't in a brilliant mood. Said her hearing aid didn't work-I sorted it out the tube was blocked.
Her friend said mums knitting bag gone missing.
Mum looked at the treats bag I take with me then told me she needed me to water her plants. I asked if she wanted her treats took to her room,told yes. I said I'd look for her knitting bag.
I went to her room ,the bag had been put on her bookcase,probably above her eyeline.
I spoke to a carer when I put her puds in the fridge,and mentioned mum seemed to think she was back in residential,and was quite agitated. Carer said she 'comes back for meals' which seemed to imply mum is spending g a lot of her time in residential.
I went back,walked in saying I'd found her bag.Was told I was shouting,but I think she had turned hearing aid right up.
She ranted accusing me of hiding the bag/ how dare I go in her room/ etc.
I crouched down in front of the wheelchair she is using,and quietly reminded her she had asked me to go and water the plants etc.
She was shouting,and one of the new residents started having a bit of a go at her saying 'she always causes trouble' (I hadnt seen him before)
His vision then started telling him to stop interfering .
Mum was saying I'm interfering and wants me to go. I agreed,but asked her to calm down a bit as she was disturbing everyone.
She tried to get the wheelchair to run into me,but this one had brakes on the back so she couldn't move it.
The resident arguing back at her now had his wife telling him,quite loudly,to stop interfering.
I told mum I'd get some one for her and she suddenly leant foward and tried to 'stab' me with the pair of knitting needles that were in her ball of wool.She missed, and I removed the bag from her reach and went for help.
As I went into the dinning room,I saw a carer from the dementia unit walking towards me.
I said mum was kicking off,she was still arguing with the other resident. She said mum was shouting but so had I been-she hadn't been in the room,or indeed the dinning room when I'd gone through a few minutes before. I said I'd raised my voice a little when accused of mumbling,but that mum was intact arguing with a resident now.
I said she had started when I'd given her the bag of knitting as had lost it. The carer said mum couldn't have lost it as had been knitting Friday . I answered her friend Ruth had to,d me she had given mum her spare needles and some wool and that mums red bag hadn't been with her since about wed.
I went back and got my stuff and left. The carers went in and I could here mum rowing with them
I sat in the car to calm down,and I saw the carer who'd said I'd been shouting in the smoking patio.
I went over and gave her the bag of treats I'd inadvertently picked up when I left. I said if I was the cause of mums upset I'm not visiting unless someone else is with me. I told her they still needed to chase up physio for mum to be issued with her own chair,and that I'd rung three times this week,but only got an answerphone.
The carer said she would tell the senior on the dementia unit 'what had happened and let her sort it all out'.
I left feeling I was being reprimanded for mum trying to stab me with her needles and for doing as asked by going to her room.
We were told,after the safe guarding complaint end of April that she needed to be in the dementia unit as there were more staff on hand to help and sit with her etc if she is upset.
It is also quieter over there, with a pleasant enclosed garden they can use.
If mum is spending most of her time back on residential,she isn't being checked up on as regularly.
She may not be taking her meds.correctly as often secretes in her top denture and then spits out.
All in all,if I'd let her stab me,maybe they would have had to section her and I wouldn't be feeling so sh...y and fed up
Sorry for long winded rant