Gall bladder removal on a person with mixed dementia.

[Mamsgirl]

Hi Turmoil,

I'd be inclined to make a list of all the things he struggles with/complains about, and what happens next with an emphasis on refusal to accept guidance or attempts to find other solutions, and how this puts himself and others at risk.

Issue / Result
Doesn't like to be restrained / Becomes violent, walks into traffic
Doesn't like weekend food / Stops eating
Refuses alternative weekend food / Stops eating
Leaves house without clothing / Becomes belligerent, impacts neighbours

Your father doesn't need to know you've done this and the assessment team might gain some insight into how volatile the situation is at times.

Good luck!

 

[bemused1]

I agree with mamsgirl re list but you have to find a way to pass it on without your dad knowing. Can,t help re mental assessment I,m afraid others will know more.Can you have a word when they arrive before they see your dad? A real problem with people who are in denial.
My oh was assessed by a cpn and I have to say when I saw her report I was gobsmacked by the things he was doing for himself. Don't make the mistake of leaving the room. If all else fails say you cannot be responsble for his welfare any more.
Let us know how it goes

 

[bemused1]

What happened Turmoil, did it work out. have sent pm hope you are ok

 

[turmoil]

Hello all

Sorry I have not posted an update but here goes!

I made a list and gave the doctor it. My Dad sat in his chair like butter would not melt and was as sharp as a knife edge, he knew the day, date year and season He askes me every day what day it is where his dead relatives are ect, ect.

The doctor prescribed Memantine and despite my Dads objections said she would arrange a support worker. She said Dad has capacity.
I explained that Dad could not be trusted with tablets so a dosset box was ordered.

1 week later and a man came to dads door and handed him four tablets in a small cardboard box, thankfully he did not take them or give them to the dog, I rang the chemist and asked them not to deliver, I would collect as I only came across the tablets by accident, ok they said. This week another box was delivered. Both are intact as Dad is refusing to take them.

The support worker came and Dad refused her offer of taking him out, apparently he is fine "Here with his little dog" She has left for good

I took him to the hospital to see the blood doctor, Wednesday just gone he asked if anyone had been intouch with us regarding the gall bladder, I said it had been removed He said he was very sorry to have to tell us this but the gall bladder was badly diseased and was cancerous, so Gall bladder cancer is now in the mix. That is where I am up to now!

Keep plodding and will update when I get chance, take care and keep strong!

Turmoil x

 

[bemused1]

goodness turmoil you are having it piled on you. no surprises then about the medication or the support . so. so hard to deal with.
no words of wisdom just hugs and here if you need a friend. there is little you can do for your dad but take care of yourself,make sure you are safe and keep in touch
bemusedx

 

[turmoil]

Thanks bemused

The gallbladder cancer is a blow, however I always knew it would take a crisis to get any hope of getting anywhere with my Dad.

I nursed my MIL with terminal cancer and hand on heart in my view dementia is by far the cruelest way to go. I have to look at this as positive as I can, maybe my Dad is going to be spared the worst that dementia can deliver.

I know which way I would prefer to go! Oh and invisible has started to take an interest in between crying of course

Thanks again and hugs!

Turmoil x