my father has deteriorated very quickly over the last few months, he’s now got double incontinence, almost no memory of family or friends, he’s becoming unsteady on his feet and is now not getting up or going down stairs and has no appetite.
The problem is - my mum (his main carer) has refused outside help from careers for him. She won’t pay for anything and penny pinches, I live 5 hours from them so it’s difficult, dad has funds set aside for care but she won’t allow people in to help wash, feed him etc, she’s got mental issues of her own, sometimes leading to anxiety and stress, but dad is being almost ‘abused’ by her, she doesn’t understand his dementia, dietary needs, even that he’s always thirsty.
I’ve written to his gp, spoken to social services, adult safeguarding, the local district nurse, everyone I can think of, but when they visit my mother tells them that they don’t want or need help.
Any suggestions would be great. Thanks in advance.
The problem is - my mum (his main carer) has refused outside help from careers for him. She won’t pay for anything and penny pinches, I live 5 hours from them so it’s difficult, dad has funds set aside for care but she won’t allow people in to help wash, feed him etc, she’s got mental issues of her own, sometimes leading to anxiety and stress, but dad is being almost ‘abused’ by her, she doesn’t understand his dementia, dietary needs, even that he’s always thirsty.
I’ve written to his gp, spoken to social services, adult safeguarding, the local district nurse, everyone I can think of, but when they visit my mother tells them that they don’t want or need help.
Any suggestions would be great. Thanks in advance.