Do not Resuscitate?

cheryl k

Registered User
Sep 9, 2012
do not resuscitate

My heart goes out to you at this time. We have a dnr on my Dad when the time comes. When I discussed this with Dad at first he said to resusitate, but then when asking if he was ready to go home to heaven he said why yes I can't wait to go to heaven. What a strong faith your Mum and my Dad has. It doesn't make it any easier and you are definitely handling it the right way. Your Mum is lucky to have you. Take care



Registered User
Apr 14, 2009
north staffs
I am so sorry you are facing this decision. Fortunately I was assisted in this by my husband himself - I think he was just about to awake at that precise moment but he seemed to be alert just then. It was then that he said himself that he didnt want to be resucitated.

We were asked just as he was waking (some time after the op) what our wishes were regarding his life should anything serious occur - before we (daughter and I have joint POA) could reply, hubby said no - so DNAR is in place on permanent basis.

It is always so difficult every twist and turn

I can only do as others and send luv, hugs and kisses

jimbo 111

Registered User
Jan 23, 2009
North Bucks
I asked the nurse tonight, very upsetting, and she said that as mum has been diagnosed with dementia and I am next of kin I could sign the forms. I asked Mum vuery gently and she said tonight if she said yes she felt God would be cross with her for giving permission to end her life. I didn't argue I just said I'd respect her wishes. I am not going to sign it when she feels like that as I don't have her permission but I think I will write a letter explaining how she feels, all honest and truthful, with how she feels and then leave it to the doctors to decide.

I know it's a fudge but if she now says she feels it would be wrong due to strong religious beliefs, I won't override that. In all honest she wouldn't survive another heart attack of that I'm sure.

I have to be guided by mum on this and I'm not going to make a permanent decision until I am sure it's what she wants. Thanks everyone.

Hello Noorza
I am sure you have made the right decision at this stage , difficult as it maybe
Ironically ,although I am not particularly religious, I share your mothers point of view about the sin of ending my own life.
It may sound contradictory , but I do not feel that a DNR is doing that,
Rather the reverse, if your body is in such a condition that it is about to expire , then it could be that intervention is against nature and God’s will
That is my logic and why I am happy to sign a Living Will and DNR
Best wishes
jimbo 111


Registered User
Jun 8, 2012
Thanks all for your best wishes, I too think that DNR is no sin as you have already died. It's what they do after death that dictates whether they bring you back or not. She was also scared that if they put DNR on the records they wouldn't give her the best care as she'd matter less. I simply did not push it, I am not going to push her into a DNR or do it on her behalf when she has such worries over it. She said she has to face her maker, and she'd worry that DNR would get her a black mark. It won't of course but what I think doesn't matter, it's what she thinks that matters.

I will write this letter to give the doctors guidance and not direct instructions.

Thanks everyone.