Dissapointed in gp visit

Discussion in 'I care for a person with dementia' started by annielou, Oct 22, 2019.

  1. annielou

    annielou Registered User

    Sep 27, 2019
    Really dissapointed after visit to gp today, feel like it was pretty much a waste of our time.
    Mum had first gp visit other week, took bloods teferred to memory clinic and was supposed to go back today for blood results but we had been back and got most of them last week after I managed to get an urgent appointment last Wednesday when mum had had really bad panic and confused time on the tuesday and I'd had to come stay with her. She kept saying she'd had enough and just wanted to go and didn't want to be here anymore.
    Last wed gp talked bout how mum felt about symptoms and loss of weight and her feeling wobbly and how low she was. He gave us test results, gave her vit d and folic acid tablets arranged b12 injections starting next week, checked weight (lost 13 kilo) and arranged another blood test to check mums iron as he thought she was anaemic.
    He said to keep this weeks appointment even though got most of results now so they could talk again about how mum was feeling and give results of iron test.
    Memory nurse came to mums yesterday and when talking about mums low mood she said they usually tell people to talk to gp who may perscribe anti depressants so as we were going today to tell them how low she felt.
    So we went to gp appointment today and different gp again, she asked what could help us with today. We said had made appointnent originally for her results of bloods but we had been on wed because mum had been really confused and upset and in a really low mood so we had got results then but he also thought mum looked anaemic so had done more tests for iron and said he wanted us keep appointment to check that and how mum feeling.
    Gp asked how mum was and mum told her not good.
    She mentioned mum low in some things, vit d, follate, iron but b12 ok and said mum had been given tablets so I told her which tablets mum had and that hadnt had iron result till today and last time said b12 low so arrange injections. We were bit confused as was bit different to what expected after last visit. She said mum towards bottom of b12 accepted level. Then she asked mum if feeling better with tablets. Mum said no but not been taking them long but hoped she would as felt terrible.
    I said i think shes worse this week she still feels really low and is so tired and wobbly and now hardly moving and is eating less the last couple of days.
    Gp started talking about test results again and said would perscribe iron tablets. Told us mum should take them twice a day after food. I said she doesnt eat much is that ok. She said should be after a proper meal when tummy full or would irritate her stomach give her pain and irritation. I said she barely eats so what if she hadnt eaten much do we still give her tablet. She said she had to eat.
    She asked mum why not eating and what her diet like to be deficient in these things. Mum said she just didnt feel like it. When your on own its hard to be bothered and she always had bad diet cos dont really like food.
    Gp said do u live on own. Mum said yes but I see these a lot. I said she doesnt eat much when she's with us either. Hubby told gp she hadnt been on own since last tuesday either as i was staying with her and she still not eating. She asked why not?
    Mum said she's 72 and old and had enough. Gp said 72 not old. Mum said it felt it to her.
    I told her mum had barely eaten since had bad bout of (diverticulitis) constipation n diarohea a few months ago.
    Told her think that mum lost most of the weight since then because clothes fit same before that as had last year when had health check they got her previous weight from. I said she eats very little, had no energy and was tired and wobbly and really low and kept saying didnt want to be here anymore and seemed to have given up on eating and doing things.
    She asked what mum liked eat and mum said not much I just don't feel like it I can't be bothered.
    Gp suggested things rich in iron and vitamins asking if mum liked them and suggested she thought of things she liked and enjoy going shopping for it and cooked that and try new things.
    I sed she doesnt cook properly anymore, I'm not sure she remembers how and she doesnt shop on own we take her and I have to prompt her what buy. So gp suggested mum let us cook for her, tell us what liked.
    Hubby said we do ask her but she doesnt know and doesnt want to eat. So if she hadnt had a lot to eatbdo we still give her tablet if going to upset her stomach.
    Gp said she had to eat. If not then these won't work and we'll have to send you hospital to be scoped to see why losing weight and may have to try infusions instead.
    We said think shes losing weight cos barely eating, gave her example wot eats in day and mum said she just didn't feel like it anymore and tends forget about it or just cant be bothered to think of anything
    Gp said I see you have some memory problems. I said not some I think a lot. She thought not been here for ten years n yet been twice in last two weeks.
    Gps suggestion was mum to get a book n when mum thought of something liked and might want to try to write it down and then when she's thinking what to eat she could look in book see in her own writing that had put something and try that .
    So in end despite any attempts from us to talk about how little mum eats, how low she's feeling and saying doesn't want to be here anymore all gp did was send prescription to mums local pharmacy for iron tablets.
    So mum will probably carry on eating very little and have to take pills on barely any food and probably feel worse. Also nothing has been done about her low mood.
  2. marionq

    marionq Registered User

    Apr 24, 2013
    Sometimes you’ve got to be very direct and say “Mum is depressed and not eating and I have been advised that anti depressants might help. What do you think”.

    GPS are like the rest of the population. A mixed bunch. Hope you get more help soon.
  3. Jessbow

    Jessbow Registered User

    I agree, You do need to suggest sometimes.

    Does mum drink? ( I dont mean alcohol!) Fortified drinks and smoothies might help. If her weight loss is significant, ask for fortisip.
  4. TNJJ

    TNJJ Registered User

    May 7, 2019
    I find I’m really direct these days to dads GP.But they are really quite good.
    I can imagine how you are feeling.Do they ever listen!!
  5. annielou

    annielou Registered User

    Sep 27, 2019
    Thanks @marionq @Jessbow @TNJJ it seems I wasnt direct enough. If we go again, although nothing booked now only nurse appointments for B12 and memory clinic appointment next month, I shall be more direct.
    I thought because we'd told other gp at last visit how bad mum felt that he would have put in notes to check how mum feeling this time. Either he hadn't done that, she hadn't read it, she wasn't interested, or we didn't say the right things for her to be concerned. Maybe direct would have been better although I wasn't impressed with her to be honest. She didn't seem to take iin anything any of us said about mums eating, weight loss or mood.
    I wrongly hoped the amount of times the three of us told her mum was feeling really low, had given up and had had enough and didn't want to be here would have been enough as I didn't like saying depressed and antidepressants in front of mum.
    Think I need to adjust my approach like you suggested x
  6. Pete1

    Pete1 Registered User

    Jul 16, 2019
    Hi @annielou, my Mum had weight had a significant weight loss and was prescribed high calorie supplement drinks (milkshakes), surprised the GP hasn't prescribed something like that, even as a temporary measure to help no only her weight gain but improve her strength. Pretty daft suggestion to get a book for Mum to write in......obviously had no appreciation of the memory issues!!! Eating can be problematic, if you do get carers for Mum (as you are looking into) then they will ensure food is served (whether eaten or not is another matter)! If Mum doesn't need personal care for a lunchtime visit you could look into meals on wheels (your local authority should provide a service) they will bring a cooked meal and dessert and are cheaper than a carer - worth looking at if personal care isn't required. All the best Annie Lou.
  7. silver'lantern

    silver'lantern Registered User

    Apr 23, 2019
    can you ring and re book to see a different gp? ask if there is one that has an interest/specialize in dementia/memory issues
    or ask to see original one again. and maybe re wording 'a bit low' as seems depressed and mention how memory team nurse suggested antidepressants. In my area the memory team organised medication once settled on new meds it was then passed over to GP. different in other areas maybe
    maybe not leave it for next emory team visit.....you and your mum need help and support now
  8. annielou

    annielou Registered User

    Sep 27, 2019
    Thanks for your replies @Pete1 and @silver'lantern
    I thought of buying some complan to try mum with. She has said she'll try it although she's not a milkshake fkavoured drink type person and may well change her mind or say never said yes to them another day but I think its at least worth a go.
    Annoyingly I went to mums local chemist today where gp had sent prescription to, to pick up mums iron tablets this morning only to find the shop shuttered and all chemist signs removed. :eek:Rung gp and receptionist said oh yes thats gone now :(They're now sending prescription to chemist at local tesco but it will not be there till tomorrow.:(

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