Dirty toilet paper round the house

Discussion in 'I care for a person with dementia' started by kevk, Apr 23, 2015.

  1. kevk

    kevk Registered User

    Feb 3, 2015
    4
    I've just moved back in with mum and dad and in the last few weeks have seen the signs that mum is having difficulty with the loo. I've found soiled tissue paper in the bathroom (on the bath rack, on the radiator), in the kitchen bin (not too bad !?) and she seems to have used a face cloth and towel appear to clean herself on occassion too. I'm also a bit worried that she may be using her hands to some extent as there are smudges on the sink,taps, walls etc. I've heard that as things progress, constipation can cause problems as the sufferer uses their fingers to 'help things move'.

    I've had a chat with dad who hadn't noticed these things (he is 90), mum would question someone coming to the look with her so nt sure what the answer is?

    If anyone has any tips I'd be very grateful !
     
  2. 2jays

    2jays Registered User

    Jun 4, 2010
    11,477
    West Midlands
    Hi welcome

    Sorry haven't got any magic answers for you at the moment - but didn't want you to feel ignored

    not had to deal with your type of situation myself.... but I'm sure, when they can, someone will know exactly how you are feeling and may have some ideas for you to help deal with this distressing part of dementia/Alzheimer's

    It's a horrid scarey, but hopefully a less lonely road - now you are a part of TP

    xx


    Sent from my iPhone using Talking Point
     
  3. Leswi

    Leswi Registered User

    Jul 13, 2014
    120
    Bedfordshire
    I've had this with mum too. A daily sachet of Laxido helped the faeces to pass without mum trying to get it out with her fingers, this was prescribed by the GP. mum is very confused about toileting though and rarely puts the paper straight into the loo unless I am helping, it goes on the floor mostly. A small bin in front of toilet helps too. Mum often forgets to pull pants down before sitting on the loo so needs watching and helping. I keep a pack of wet wipes by mum's chair to wipe hands before she eats to be on the safe side.
     
  4. kevk

    kevk Registered User

    Feb 3, 2015
    4
    Thanks lewsi. Appreciate your response.



    Sent from my iPhone using Talking Point
     
  5. SisterAct

    SisterAct Registered User

    The toileting issue is hard to address sometimes and a lot depends on the person and what they are thinking.
    Dad used to go all over the house (in his mind he was in a different house each hour/day, and so was the toilet). Sometimes the simplest of things can work though.
    We bought a large canvass painting of a red flower (from the charity shop £2.50) and put it up outside the toilet. Every time he needed the toilet, we took him and told him the toilet was always by the flower...it worked!!! He always found it whichever house he thought he was in. He also said he knew he was safe when he saw the flower as he knew we were there too. So perhaps a bright red bin by the toilet and keep repeating where to put the paper for your Mum might help?

    Wet wipes were always kept handy.

    For washing we had two face clothes, one blue and the other cream. Again we were with him continually repeating that;-
    Blue was for bum
    Cream was for face
    He thought this was hysterical and we used to sing it to him.....sounds silly I know but who cares..it worked
    Luv
    Polly x
     
  6. Ann Mac

    Ann Mac Registered User

    Oct 17, 2013
    3,699
    Hi KevK, I'm having some issues with the use of loo paper with my Mil too - in that I think she is either forgetting to use it - or maybe forgetting how to :( She tears off sheet after sheet, folds them and puts them in the bin without using them, or packs them into her her pockets, up her sleeves, into her bra - but isn't using it to wipe :confused: I'm finding smears on the walls in the bathroom, or on the edge of the bath (which is right next to the loo), or on the sink and towels in there. Often, if she has taken her undies off at night, the bed clothes are also smeared. The trouble is that Mil is absolutely in denial that she has any toiletting issues at all (faced with a wet bed, she insists that its just that she has been sweating, most of the time) and I just once tried pointing out the smears on the walls, when she let me in to help her wash after she had used the loo - she was adamant that someone else was responsible, that they were there when she entered the room and got really angry with me :( There is no way on this planet she will allow me (or anyone else) to accompany her to the toilet - its enough of a battle some days to persuade her to let me help her wash!

    So, I now keep two towels on the bathroom radiator (which is like a heated stepped towel rack) and the whole family know to use the one on the lower 'rungs' as Mil only ever uses the one on the top 'rung' which I change daily (or more, if needed), and everytime she goes to the loo or even comes in from day care or just from downstairs, we insist she uses hand gel. Its not ideal, but its the best we have been able to do, so far :(

    Good Luck x
     
  7. RedLou

    RedLou Registered User

    Jul 30, 2014
    1,161
    Didn't the Japanese invent a loo that sprayed you with warm water 'after.' Perfect for dementia! ;)
     
  8. canary

    canary Registered User

    Feb 25, 2014
    9,302
    Female
    South coast
  9. kevk

    kevk Registered User

    Feb 3, 2015
    4
    Thanks for the tips guys. Mum also seems to carry lots of tissue round the house come to think of it ! Will be stocking up on hand gel for sure !!


    Sent from my iPhone using Talking Point
     
  10. Kevinl

    Kevinl Registered User

    Aug 24, 2013
    4,661
    Salford
    It can get a bit like a "dirty protest" for those old enough to remember the Irish intern issues of the past. I find smears all over the place and used loo roll left anywhere convenient except in the convenience. I'll go with the use of a mild laxative at night so you can predict when it might happen.
    K
     
  11. AlsoConfused

    AlsoConfused Registered User

    Sep 17, 2010
    1,958
    Mum was creating so much havoc (including blocking the loo and putting poo and smears everywhere) we found we had to supervise her on the loo as the only way of keeping sane ourselves:(.

    I accept it's marginally easier being the same sex as the parent needing help; however if there's no one else around to help, Kev, you may well find yourself doing this for your Mum .....

    At first I used to initiate a loo visit (when I could) and simply follow Mum closely up the stairs and into the loo so she couldn't shut the door on me. Obviously Mum didn't like it but she did get used to it quickly. I didn't keep in eye contact and chatted casually (when appropriate) as I waited. If Mum got too irate I backed off. We can all cope better when the mess Mum makes is better "contained".

    I lay out all of Mum's stuff and mine near to the loo (replacement pad, knickers, wet wipes, plastic gloves and plastic apron etc). Mum associates "people wearing plastic gloves" with "nurses" and that association tends to make her more co-operative.
     

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