We are our own worst enemy, @Dutchman . I doubt very much that you're to blame for Bridget's dementia. I wrote a post earlier today about similar feelings of my own and received very good advice from marionq and Grannie G. The meditations of Marcus Aurelius were mentioned, one of which was : You have power over your mind - not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength. I must follow this advice or as was also said it's a case of either sink or swim. Not giving advice here, just repeating what was said to me and I found it very helpful. I hope in time you can rise up from the depths of your despair.