Dead end with social worker

[Alisonjc77]

I am extremely concerned with my grandads welfare and the diagnosis made by his social worker. I'll try and keep it short. He is continually delusional now, convinced he's not in his home but an exact copy in the wrong place. He constantly calls family or asks his carer to pick him up and take him, he very anxious and distressed when we can't, and has started to wonder from home, walking (he's very unsteady), calling taxis, and even the police. His SW says he has capacity because when she asks him if he wants to live there he says yes! Even though she admits he says if there were people outside (she agrees this means the support living flat he's been waiting for). Family feel we are not been listen to or our knowledge of him being taken in to consideration. The SW brought in an independent advocate for a meeting last week because grandad didn't want to attend, even though several family members were there. They had met him once for around an hour. He has a wide supportive family (with LPA) and extended family, plus many friends and neighbours who could advocate for him, can the social worker just do this without consulting us first. He seems to be nearing the later stages of dementia, though the SW assured us he's not (she has not consulted his doctor on this, or taken on board his opinion that he's not safe at home) and I'm worried she's leaving it as long as possible before doing anything and this will be harder for him in the end. Yesterday while looking after my disabled sister I had to field 7 calls from him to stop him getting in a taxi. My mum has this every day (she's nearly 70) and my sister to care for and I've given up a days work each week to cope with everything. I'm running out of...well everything.
I'm currently going crossed eyed reading the MCAct code of practice. Last point, the CQC highlighted a lack of understanding, training, and policies not updated in their recent report, which further worries me. Thanks for reading.

 

[karaokePete]

That all reads strangely and I feel for you.
May I suggest you phone the Help-line and speak to one of the experts to see if you can be pointed in the right direction. The details are:-
National Dementia Helpline
0300 222 11 22
Our helpline advisers are here for you.

Helpline opening hours:
Monday to Wednesday 9am – 8pm
Thursday and Friday 9am – 5pm
Saturday and Sunday 10am – 4pm

 

[Kevinl]

Sadly you've just fond out what a lot of us on here have learned the hard way, the SS don't seem to want to know, they wait for a crisis before they intervene.
The "ethos" behind the 2104 Care Act has made the use of care homes very much a last resort, a few years ago if someone wasn't coping at home then a care home was considered, now it's seen as something to be avoided at all costs...and that's the keyword "costs".
If your dad would be self funding you don't need the SW to approve the move but if you want the LA to pay for the care home then you're asking for £1,000+ per week from the council tax payers pocket at a time of cuts so you can see why the SW wants to avoid that.
I've always found IMCA's (Independent Mental Capacity Assessors) very useful and very much on the side of the family, they can challenge a social worker (many I understand are former social workers) to account in a way that a lay-person can't, they know the rules which makes them less likely to fall for some of the BS some social workers talk.
When someone has the ability to use a telephone, take a taxi and the other things you say then maybe the SW got the IMCA in to ensure their opinion wasn't open to question, generally SW's and IMCA's have a "strained" relationship if not outright confrontational when the correct procedures aren't followed.
If your dad is openly resistant to a care home then you'd need to find somewhere that could handle that (assuming that is what you want), many homes won't take someone who will be challenging to being there, possibly try and escape or confront the staff if they want to get out, homes like that (usually classed as Elderly Mentally Impaired) Nursing Homes aren't that common and don't come cheap.
The one factor to consider is the effect on your mum, the SW has a duty of care to her too so by having a large supportive family, friends and neighbours all willing to help means they'll try and keep him in that environment until it become untenable or at least not sustainable.
It's a bad situation to be in, specially for your mum who has to deal with it 24/7, I know I've done it without help from family and friends and it does grind you down until something goes wrong and the SW's have to step in.
K

 

[Alisonjc77]

Thanks for the responses. Think I will give them a ring in the morning. Grandad wants to go in to a flat in an assisted living facility, but he's been waiting over a year. He can't cope with waiting. The problem comes when anyone official asks him something, he says what he thinks they want to hear. He's admitted this freely to family. The SW suggested putting a GPS tracker in his shoe, mum questioned who this would contact and was told family. We said no, firstly what if mum can't get to him while careing for my sister, but more to the point everything being suggested puts more pressure on the family. She's been told we won't do any more than we are currently doing (and that needs to change too), they have the duty of care not us. If he has capacity why does he need tracking (and an advocate). X

 

[fortune]

You can get a consultant geriatric psychiatrist to assess capacity either privately or on the NHS, the GP might be willing to help organise this and persuade your father to co-operate with it. Or the GP might be willing to give an opinion on his capacity. There is obviously good reason to suspect his capacity and the SW is not trained or authorised to assess or rule on his capacity. Do you have LPA for health and welfare as well as property and finance? This could be very important as if he is deemed to have lost capacity you need the health and welfare to make a decision on his behalf as to where he lives. I'm afraid Kevini is right - it is all about money and the more you support and help your dad the less will be offered by the council. It's an outrageous situation that has become the norm.