Dad's in hospital, please help!

Discussion in 'I care for a person with dementia' started by Claire-5000, Jan 17, 2018.

  1. Claire-5000

    Claire-5000 Registered User

    May 1, 2017
    My Dad is in a terrible way. His dementia is mainly forgetfulness but to the point he doesn't retain any information. He's becoming increasingly frail too, taking 45 mins to dress, an hour to eat a meal and I think he's becoming incontinent.

    He had NHS nurses twice a day who are concerned for his safety, an Age UK home help once a week and me for a full day once a week. He won't let the nurses regulate his insulin (he's a type 1 diabetic) and he regularly takes extra doses. The nurses are aware, we got a locked box but somehow he took more anyway and collapsed in the street, breaking his arm.

    Only the day before a 30 year old drug addict who befriended him was found by the police hiding in his house. It appears she opened the window locks and has been letting herself in for ages. He's been a safe guarding risk for about 2 years because of this woman. She's very well known to police for taking advantage of people and is a serious risk. Although his phone was found in her possession, she can't be charged with anything as it's his word against hers and the CPS say he doesn't have mental capacity.

    Now in hosptial, I've made it very clear and so have the NHS nurses that he needs to go into a home. He's 100% not safe at home. The hosptial are holding him against his will on a DOLs for now but won't/can't tell me what they plan to do for the future.

    He's self funding and I've found the perfect home for him. They're going to visit him in hospital with me on Friday and see if they meet his needs (I really hope so!).

    My question is, will the hospital/social services let him go into a home? What's the process from here? Everyone seems to agree he can't go home but no one is communicating with me at all.

    I don't have power of attorney. It's in process and the OPG have all the forms. Finance will be granted at the end of the month. Health and Welfare not for 8 weeks as the 1st forms had to be redone.
  2. Beate

    Beate Registered User

    May 21, 2014
    If he's self-funding you don't even have to involve SS. They will not have to fund him so it's very unlikely that they'll object. You have found a home by yourself, so get him there. If the home agree to take him you should be fine - the only thing they'll be worried about is getting paid so if the finances LPA comes through soon there shouldn't be a problem.

    Btw, a DoLS is standard in hospital for people without mental capacity. The home will also have to apply for one for him.
  3. Shedrech

    Shedrech Volunteer Moderator

    Dec 15, 2012
    #3 Shedrech, Jan 17, 2018
    Last edited: Jan 17, 2018
    hello @Claire-5000
    thank goodness your dad is currently somewhere safe where he can be monitored and looked after

    if it's now considered that your dad no longer has capacity to make decisions for himself, and POA isn't yet in place, then I guess a Best Interests meeting will be called and the case will be put as to a move into a care home being in his best interests - as a family member, your opinions should be taken into account, so do ask to speak to the hospital Social Worker/discharge manager and let them know you have a care home in mind
    from what you've written, it's unlikley the outcome wouldn't be for 24 hour care
    it is tricky for medics as they are bound by patient confidentiality, though they should take notice of family
    if you would like back-up with the hospital bureaucracy speak with the PALS in the hospital = Patient Advice + Liaison Service
    as your dad is not judged to have capacity, so cannot make the decision to move into a care home/go home, but you don't yet have POA for health & welfare in place, I'm not sure it's quite as straight forward as you just moving him - though if he is assessed as medically fit, the hospital will most probably be happy to work with you to organise a discharge asap
    maybe have a word with one of the folk on the AS Helpline tomorrow
  4. la lucia

    la lucia Registered User

    Jul 3, 2011
    If POAs are in the pipeline just tell that to people that need to know. I found that most authorities (obviously not banks) were fine when they were informed that the POAs are signed and just awaiting return from the OPG.

    This should be sufficient for the hospital but if you feel that they're not keeping you in the loop then I would suggest that you take it to PALs who should help. You'll find their contact details on the CCGs website or maybe in a leaflet at the hospital reception.

    I hope you have success with the home and your dad gets sorted. If you are self-funding then as Beate said, you don't need to ask SS.
  5. Claire-5000

    Claire-5000 Registered User

    May 1, 2017
    Thank you all for your replies! It's been a crazy few weeks so sorry I haven't responded before.

    Dad technically did have mental capacity according to social services and the NHS but not the police or CPS. When I explained about the police, the hospital did a mental capacity assessment and agreed he didn't have capacity.

    From there, it was a brief best interests meeting with the hospital dementia care team and it was agreed he should go in a home.

    Now the problem is trying to find a home that will take a fit 75 year old who is quite active but is severely mentally impaired. I really don't want to put him in a full nursing home/EMI unit if I can help it!

    I just thought I'd update to thank you and let others know my experience if they're in the same situation.
  6. Registered User

    Jan 16, 2014
    I am glad for your dad that arrangements have been made to keep him safe
  7. Kevinl

    Kevinl Registered User

    Aug 24, 2013
    I don't know that you'll find too many care homes that will take a diabetic who can't manage their own insulin, I feel that you may have to look for a nursing home where there is a qualified nurse to manage this aspect of his health and you could apply for Funded Nursing Care to cover some of the extra cost.
    If he's as you say fit and active but with little capacity then that might be a hard placement. many homes will do active with some capacity or inactive without capacity but the combination of someone active without capacity could be hard to find.
    My wife's in the no capacity but still mobile so she's in the section of the home that take people like that, eventually as her mobility continues to decline she'll be moved to the "physically dependent" unit where the none mobile live.
    I hope you get the home you want but when you visited did you picture how your dad might fit in? The home's first consideration is to the existing residents and how your dad might impact on their lives and if other visitors might find his lack of capacity a problem.
  8. myss

    myss Registered User

    Jan 14, 2018
    Hi Claire 5000, what is wrong with the home you mentioned in your first post? It was perfect for him back then but now you've mentioned about have to find one for him.

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