Dad is on 'at risk' register

[LMM]

I urgently need to find a suitable home for my dad. Problem is he is not advanced enough for a Dimentia unit but would not be safe in a residential home. I'd like to see him staying in his home but would need permanent care. Any advice would be appreciated.


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[BeckyJan]

Hello and welcome to Talking Point.

I strongly advise that you speak with a Social Worker or one of the Mental Health Team who has been dealing with your Dad. If you are unaware of who these are then you should speak to the GP or District Nurse as they should guide you too. They should be able provide a list of all care homes in your district and from there find one that may meet your Dad's needs. Then I suggest you actually visit them unannounced to check out how you feel. Its whether you like the layout the warmth and welcome, how the residents appear to be and how the carers work with them and you as a visitor.

When you find one that suits then the Manager will assess whether they can meet your Dad's needs. That's when the guidance from the MH Team will help too.

These links may help you, one of which is about how to choose a care home.

http://www.alzheimers.org.uk/site/scripts/documents_info.php?&documentID=175
http://www.alzheimers.org.uk/site/scripts/download_info.php?fileID=1597

I hope that helps.

 

[love.dad.but..]

I looked at 16 care homes over a very short time in the summer for Dad one of the problems we had similar to you is that Dad seemed inbetween...beyond the care homes that seemed to have early stage dementia where the environment seemed better for Dad but as he is a wanderer and his mental capacity was declining although secure would probably have either not managed with his moderate stage or care homes where residents seemed far more advanced than Dad and that wouldn't have been right for his stage either although we realised he may reach that stage. It wasn't easy as others have said go unannounced. I was always happy to be kept waiting as I could watch and listen before being shown around. I eventually found one that has residents with a mixture of stages which is a specialist dementia nursing home that will take dad right through. I knew when visiting through gut feeling if a home wasn't right for dad and you will as well. I asked lots of questions from notes and eyes and ears are great tools! In my county Kent the adult services produce a thick book with all types of provider details and checklist of things to ask and look for maybe your county council produces one. Good luck it is a daunting exercise and not one any of us want to do or thought we would ever have to....although no home however good offers everything as we would like so there are always compromises...kind and caring as far as I could tell from visiting and checking the last 2 cqc reports were priority for me.

 

[LMM]

Thanks

Thanks - will be doing as you suggest and checking cqc reports.

I looked at 16 care homes over a very short time in the summer for Dad one of the problems we had similar to you is that Dad seemed inbetween...beyond the care homes that seemed to have early stage dementia where the environment seemed better for Dad but as he is a wanderer and his mental capacity was declining although secure would probably have either not managed with his moderate stage or care homes where residents seemed far more advanced than Dad and that wouldn't have been right for his stage either although we realised he may reach that stage. It wasn't easy as others have said go unannounced. I was always happy to be kept waiting as I could watch and listen before being shown around. I eventually found one that has residents with a mixture of stages which is a specialist dementia nursing home that will take dad right through. I knew when visiting through gut feeling if a home wasn't right for dad and you will as well. I asked lots of questions from notes and eyes and ears are great tools! In my county Kent the adult services produce a thick book with all types of provider details and checklist of things to ask and look for maybe your county council produces one. Good luck it is a daunting exercise and not one any of us want to do or thought we would ever have to....although no home however good offers everything as we would like so there are always compromises...kind and caring as far as I could tell from visiting and checking the last 2 cqc reports were priority for me.

 

[LMM]

Thanks

Its great to hear from people with experience in what we are going through and it helps to have a direction. Thanks

I looked at 16 care homes over a very short time in the summer for Dad one of the problems we had similar to you is that Dad seemed inbetween...beyond the care homes that seemed to have early stage dementia where the environment seemed better for Dad but as he is a wanderer and his mental capacity was declining although secure would probably have either not managed with his moderate stage or care homes where residents seemed far more advanced than Dad and that wouldn't have been right for his stage either although we realised he may reach that stage. It wasn't easy as others have said go unannounced. I was always happy to be kept waiting as I could watch and listen before being shown around. I eventually found one that has residents with a mixture of stages which is a specialist dementia nursing home that will take dad right through. I knew when visiting through gut feeling if a home wasn't right for dad and you will as well. I asked lots of questions from notes and eyes and ears are great tools! In my county Kent the adult services produce a thick book with all types of provider details and checklist of things to ask and look for maybe your county council produces one. Good luck it is a daunting exercise and not one any of us want to do or thought we would ever have to....although no home however good offers everything as we would like so there are always compromises...kind and caring as far as I could tell from visiting and checking the last 2 cqc reports were priority for me.

 

[halojones]

Very good information and advice and support love dad....I wish you good luck on finding the CH, LMM ,having to do this is certainly is not anyone's idea of fun, at this time of year as well, you poor thing....I do hope you get your dad the best place for him so he is safe and settled soon...xxx Hugs xxx