Hi,
I'm new. My mum is 80 & was diagnosed with Alzheimer's about 18 months ago. She lives independently, still drives, walks the dog several times a day, uses the computer, goes to social occasions etc but is becoming progressively more forgetful & repetitive. She has always had very poor hearing which obv doesn't exactly help (2 aids) and has always been a bit of a stubborn character! Sadly her partner of 25 years has just died but she is so far coping well. My sister & I both live 4 hours drive away from mum but my older brother is nearer and visits her much more often with his wife and young son & sometimes his grown up kids too. His feedback re how mum is doing is always quite bad but on the phone she still seems fairly ok . He thinks she shouldn't be on her own but she tells me she wants less visitors and more peace and quiet! He thinks we should be acting now to organise more care for her but mum says she's fine and when I saw her a month ago we had a normal week end together albeit with lots of 'revolving door' conversations and less eating (she has really lost appetite) We all obviously have commitments that make caring for her our selves a difficult prospect logistically let alone the emotional/practical side of things but we are all naturally keen to help however we can, my brother has even suggested they move, sell my mums house and buy somewhere between them with a granny annexe so they can keep a closer eye on her. I find the mis match between what my bro says and what I hear on the phone and saw a month ago so strange & really hard to work out. I'm wondering if it could actually be my brother trying to almost 'over care' because he feels so rotten about the whole thing. Or of course I could just be getting completely skewed impression cos mostly only talk to mum on phone (but then last month face to face she didn't seem as bad as my brother says) Has anyone else had differing opinions to other family members re their Alzheimer's relatives ability/care needs? Sorry for long post. I'd so appreciate anyone else's thoughts. It's all a bit of an emotional roller coaster!
I'm new. My mum is 80 & was diagnosed with Alzheimer's about 18 months ago. She lives independently, still drives, walks the dog several times a day, uses the computer, goes to social occasions etc but is becoming progressively more forgetful & repetitive. She has always had very poor hearing which obv doesn't exactly help (2 aids) and has always been a bit of a stubborn character! Sadly her partner of 25 years has just died but she is so far coping well. My sister & I both live 4 hours drive away from mum but my older brother is nearer and visits her much more often with his wife and young son & sometimes his grown up kids too. His feedback re how mum is doing is always quite bad but on the phone she still seems fairly ok . He thinks she shouldn't be on her own but she tells me she wants less visitors and more peace and quiet! He thinks we should be acting now to organise more care for her but mum says she's fine and when I saw her a month ago we had a normal week end together albeit with lots of 'revolving door' conversations and less eating (she has really lost appetite) We all obviously have commitments that make caring for her our selves a difficult prospect logistically let alone the emotional/practical side of things but we are all naturally keen to help however we can, my brother has even suggested they move, sell my mums house and buy somewhere between them with a granny annexe so they can keep a closer eye on her. I find the mis match between what my bro says and what I hear on the phone and saw a month ago so strange & really hard to work out. I'm wondering if it could actually be my brother trying to almost 'over care' because he feels so rotten about the whole thing. Or of course I could just be getting completely skewed impression cos mostly only talk to mum on phone (but then last month face to face she didn't seem as bad as my brother says) Has anyone else had differing opinions to other family members re their Alzheimer's relatives ability/care needs? Sorry for long post. I'd so appreciate anyone else's thoughts. It's all a bit of an emotional roller coaster!