My OH has Alzheimer’s and also diabetes type 2. He has had diabetes for the past 12 years but is kept under control by diet and tablets. We met up with my sister and brother in law the other day and to be truthful I have never liked them but have made the effort to get on with them. She seems to get pleasure in making sarcastic remarks whenever she can. I have finally had enough. She supposedly came to visit her brother but she never really talked to him and when I overheard her telling someone that his Alzheimer’s is due to his diabetes so it’s his own fault! I know there is research into the connection between the two but I don’t know if anything has been proved yet. I think she is cruel and I now no longer wish to have any connection with them. This a wicked disease and distressing for me without someone trying to make us feel as if it is our fault. Why are some people particularly nasty. I have been so low after this visit.
Connection between diabetes and Alzheimer’s
- Thread starter Linda G
- Start date
Some people who do have diabetes go on to develop dementia @Linda G. My husband had diabetes type 2 too.
This does not excuse your sister`s behaviour. There are many many people who do not have diabetes who develop dementia.
You are under enough stress now without having to field unconstructive comments from family members who think it is their right to say what they like.
I fell out with my sister too when she insisted my husband needed a `project` to keep him occupied because he was so bored. She made out I was over dramatising his condition and it was up to me to make life more interesting for him.
Try not to let it get to you if you can. I know how much it hurts but if the two of you have never really been best friends it`s not likely to change now.
Come here for your support. Everyone here understands there is nothing your husband could have done at this time to prevent his dementia.
Hopefully in time this will change.
This does not excuse your sister`s behaviour. There are many many people who do not have diabetes who develop dementia.
You are under enough stress now without having to field unconstructive comments from family members who think it is their right to say what they like.
I fell out with my sister too when she insisted my husband needed a `project` to keep him occupied because he was so bored. She made out I was over dramatising his condition and it was up to me to make life more interesting for him.
Try not to let it get to you if you can. I know how much it hurts but if the two of you have never really been best friends it`s not likely to change now.
Come here for your support. Everyone here understands there is nothing your husband could have done at this time to prevent his dementia.
Hopefully in time this will change.
I don't blame you at all for wanting to sever contact - as if things aren't difficult enough without people making cruel and uninformed remarks.
As Grannie G says, having T2 doesn't mean you will develop dementia. And there are many people with dementia who do not have T2 - I wonder what your sister thinks they did to 'deserve it'. My mother has Alzheimers, no T2 and no other current ailments other than mild gastric reflux.
I suspect your sister's remarks are in part because she wants to believe she can avoid getting it herself by 'taking care of herself'. All of us on here know that doesn't necessarily make any difference, of course. But whatever the reason, her remarks are crass and unhelpful. I hope you have other family and friends who are more supportive.
As Grannie G says, having T2 doesn't mean you will develop dementia. And there are many people with dementia who do not have T2 - I wonder what your sister thinks they did to 'deserve it'. My mother has Alzheimers, no T2 and no other current ailments other than mild gastric reflux.
I suspect your sister's remarks are in part because she wants to believe she can avoid getting it herself by 'taking care of herself'. All of us on here know that doesn't necessarily make any difference, of course. But whatever the reason, her remarks are crass and unhelpful. I hope you have other family and friends who are more supportive.
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There is certainly a link between vascular dementia and diabetes, in that if you have diabetes you are more likely to get vascular dementia, but that is not the only factor and the link between Alzheimers and diabetes is more tenuous. Dementia isnt as simple as doing or not doing things to prevent it - there are lots and lots of factors in why you get it and research is only scratching the surface. I do feel that the current media myths that keeping your mind active, doing exercises, eating a healthy diet etc will prevent dementia is leading to a perception that if you get dementia it must be because you somehow failed to look after yourself.
Even if your sister is right it is cruel to say it to him. I wouldnt want to have any more to do with her either.
Even if your sister is right it is cruel to say it to him. I wouldnt want to have any more to do with her either.
Although some people with diabetes may develop vascular dementia or Alzheimer's the evidence is not by any means convincing that there is a direct connection as opposed to contributing to it. In any event diabetes runs a course of neurovascular deterioration in many people that don't go on to develop dementia.
The Alzheimer's Society has invested in this research by Professor Stephen Wharton :
https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/resea...ng-relationship-between-diabetes-and-dementia
Its a horrible disease and often family who don't actually help can be the worse in making criticisms and crack remarks, which can be hurtful. I think I would just put your sisters remarks down to complete ignorance and perhaps almost arrogant behaviour and move on
You can choose your friends but you can't choose your family ! So choose to keep people around you that care about you and are supportive and ditch the rest ! My mum was type 2 diabetic and developed vascular dementia later in life but would never have said she brought it on herself. We are all dealt a different hand in life some seem to sail through with no ailments whatsoever whereas others are beset by many different problems, sadly that's life. Nobody deserves dementia or cancer or any other disease however they may have led their life so take heart and as i say keep the people around you that really care and look after yourself. In truth she's probably nasty because she doesn't know how to deal with the situation and because if she can blame it on his diabetes she probably feels safe from getting it herself, but who knows what life has in store !! take car and keep your chin up xx
