Concerned for mums safety as she has started going out alone

[towergirl3]

My mum is in the mid to late stages of dementia, she is very physically able and will go out by herself. Lately she has been asking about her parents and wants to go and see them (both have passed away more than 20 years ago) Her childhood home is within walking distance of her current home. We have spoken to the occupants in the case of her turning up there, the other say my son found her in that area, very confused and brought her home. We can't stop her going out but worry that she will become lost or confused and not be able to find her way home. Can anyone offer any advice or know of anything we can do to keep her safe? I have thought of a device that tracks her but she wouldn't wear anything like that.

Many thanks for any ideas or advice

 

[Beate]

Trackers these days have different shapes and sizes, find a small one and tell her it's a funky key ring.

Might she be persuaded to attend a Day Centre or get someone from a sitting service to accompany her on walks?

I would contact Social Services if I was you, because someone who wanders places themself at considerable risk.

 

[LadyA]

Hello towergirl. This must be a big worry for you. Your mum is very vulnurable, not only because of the risk of getting lost, or having an accident, but sadly, because there are some nasty types out there who could take advantage of an elderly, confused lady.

As for tracking, how predictable is your mum? Does she always, for exampe, take her handbag? If so, you could slip a small tracker into the lining of her bag. There are good ones available, but they aren't cheap. Another option is a mobile phone, but that would have to be charged, and she would need to take it with her.

I suppose long term, you need to be thinking in terms of your mum's safety. So far she has only wandered during the day. Can she get out at night?

ps. another thing. Make sure your mum always has some id on her! One of my aunts finally had to go into a nursing home when she was found wandering the streets at 2 a.m., in her nightie. She had nothing with her, but fortunately, was found in her own neighbourhood, by someone who knew who she was, and where she lived. Unfortunately, she had locked herself out of her house! The police had to contact my cousin, her daughter, who had a spare key.

 

[Kazzy2016]

Hi

I know how this can be frustrating and concerning. Mum wanders out when she gets anxious about 'getting home' to her mum - my nan who died 19 years ago in London.

A tracker device is a good idea, I am fortunate that so far mum stays close to where we live due to the fact she cannot move that fast anymore.

Try to find a way that works for you.




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[missmole]

It is such a worry isn't it? My mum started wandering a few months ago. Not far but enough to make me concerned about her safety. We ended up getting her a live-in carer with me visiting 3 times a week and my brother when he can. It might be worth you starting to make plans for some sort of care if you can. Is she acting out of character or more strangely than the usual dementia symptoms? It turned out that my mum had urine infection and I didn't realise that it can make people with dementia behave in a more extreme way than usual. I think my mum was a bit dehydrated too - older people often don't drink nearly enough water and this can cause delusion and irrational behaviour.

 

[marionq]

This was the worst of all the stages so far for my husband. He often turned up outside his teenage home (he is 84) but I dont think he went in as it looked different. Eventually he went further and further and at his worst was missing for ten hours. SS insisted I look for a care home. We used mobile phone and tracker but there comes a point when neither is sufficient.

In our case we avoided the care home by stepping up the number of days at daycentre (initially they were reluctant as he was high risk) and taking fairly high doses of Trazadone. John is much more manageable now and very settled at his Daycentres. I can't say there are no issues but none as bad as the wandering and the constant urge to go out.