Concerned about my memory problems

[jenniferpa]

Liz do you have a lot on your mind? Are you juggling the normal things we're doing in out 50s (work, parents, children, partners)? If so I'd say the sort of forgetting that you are describing is perfectly normal. Mind you I have to say that - this describes me as well. I do tend to think of it as we have so much easily accessible memory, and sometimes it gets filled up with so much trivia that stuff sloshes out. Not scientific at all, but at 53, it makes me feel better.

 

[Vonny]

My memory is getting worse

My memory has got much worse since I started caring for mum. I'm not sure if it is:

a) tiredness
b) too much to do: work, child, pets, mum & dad, housework etc etc
c) worrying about getting dementia after seeing it day in day out, in the shape of my mum
d) age (50)
e) combination of all of the above

I suspect (e) is the correct answer but it is worrying at times. The more I have on my plate the worse my memory is.

I do love the technical term for it Jennifer: "that stuff sloshes out"

Vonny xxx

 

[SilverStar]

Thanks Jennifer,
Unfortunately I think it may be a little more than having a cluttered mind and I'll have another word with the doctor next time I need to make an appointment because it's something that has concerned me for the last 18months or so.
Cheers,
Liz

 

[Grannie G]

Hello Liz.
Are you going through the menopause? This could be a cause of your symptoms.

 

[jenniferpa]

Well I've always been a touch scatterbrained (left a child at a birthday party once and forgot to pick it up) which maybe why I'm less concerned. I think one has a pretty good grasp of one's own "norm" so if this is out of it, undoubtedly your GP is the best person to see. I suppose I should warn you though, that it's possible you'll get brushed off - it happens a lot. You mentioned medication I think - that can have an effect, also the menopause (mine was surgically induced so I don't know). We normally suggest a diary which you can then show to the GP. I hope they 1) take you seriously 2) adequately check you out and then 3) can reassure you.

 

[Vonny]

Are you going through the menopause? This could be a cause of your symptoms.

The menopause can certainly cause bizarre symptoms. A close friend who is normally the most inedpendent, phlegmatic, pragmatic and down-to-earth Yorkshirewoman I know, was convinced that Al Quaeda was holding up our local MacDonalds because her husband had gone there. She was so convinced of this and other strange thoughts that she took herself off to the doctor without telling anyone of her fears, where she was diagnosed with the Menopause.

Maybe, given my memory lapses and depression, I should visit the doctor to see if I too am going through it.

Apologies pksm for hijacking this thread as I'm pretty sure that you aren't suffering from the menopause

Vonny xxx

 

[Brucie]

My memory has got much worse since I started caring for mum

this may be the key.

When we care for someone who has dementia we - at least in my experience - have to get into their world to try and understand conversations, behaviours etc. We also try to empathise with them - I remember telling Jan "yes, I have problems remembering this or that" to reasssure her, and it is true - some things have always eluded me.

In doing this it is easy to temporarily find it difficult to return to our own world. It takes so much energy - the caring - that we may not have the ability to do so with any speed.

Depression can also be a factor.

The thing about memory is that it is based on refreshing.

[large computers use something similar - hierarchical storage, where less frequently used information is progressively backed off its 'short term memory' into slower, long term memory, and can end up with a human needing to go to a safe to retrieve a tape]

The more things we do at a time, the more worries we have, the more that the refreshing doesn't happen, so things become less memorable.

I found that misplacing keys etc was not really a problem as we all do that from time to time. Picking up keys and wondering 'what are these things used for?' would probably freak me out though...

 

[Vonny]

Brucie, I love the way you explain stuff I never think of myself as a computer bod despite having programmed for 10 years (COBOL, shows how long ago THAT was ), but your explanations always hit the spot when you compare our brains with computers and things suddenly fall into place

Thanks

Vonny xx

 

[Brucie]

when you compare our brains with computers

It is something that only occurred to me as I tried to comprehend what was happening to Jan. I suspect 44 years working with computers has helped me a lot in my journey.

COBOL... well, I played with that, but in 1965 there was a language called ACL [Atlas Commercial Language] that knocked the spots off it for usability!

 

[panpam83]

reply

Sometimes people under stress,don't sleep well.If a person is sleep deprived all kinds of things happen with the memory.They did test of extreme sleep deprivations,can lead delusions.If you are not getting good sleep ask your dr. for lunesta.It has been great for me, because i get awaken 2 times a night by my spouse.Without 8 hrs. i am not right.

 

[BarryW]

Dont' panic: (hithhikers guide)

If you are seriously concerned then get an MRI scan which will show immediately if there is anything for you to seriously take care of, other than that it could just be down to long hours of work, stress, and lack of good regular sleep and an ordered lifestyle. It may be that you drink heavily or smoke legal or otherwise which could affect you I am not saying that you drink or take drugs but one never knows LOL! anyway if your GP wont refer you to a consultant for a scan then you must insist and do not be put off, they are human too and can make errors of judgement based on your symptoms. remember they are there to treat the whole of you not just the one problem you tell them about.

 

[evertonian]

i might have early onset dementia

my GP has sent me to see a consultant psychiatrist who asked me a lot of questions about my memory loss. and gave me a simple test, he then wrote to me and my GP to say he was refering me to a early onset dementia team. but as yet heard nothing.my memory loss is affecting my work, i am a builder, and every time i go out my van i forget what it was i wanted or foget to take enough materials with me,sometime watching the telly when the adverts come on i cant remember what the programme is i am watching, not able to find tools i am using, etc its really frustrating.has enyone got any hints or tips for me please.

 

[Grannie G]

I`m really sorry about this evertonian. The only tip I can think of is for you to carry a note pad around with you and write down what you need to remember as soon as you think of it.
Welcome to Talking Point. I hope you`ll get lots of support and helpful ideas.

 

[TinaT]

I don't know if this will help you but my husband was just like you have described for a number of years. He managed to hide it from me and I just thought he was careless, or being awkward. He didn't go to work so I think that is how he managed to hide it for so long.

Do you work on your own? Is there some way you can get an apprentice, or someone you work with who you can talk to and who may be able to help you with the memory problems.

If it is all getting too much for you can you 'go on the sick'? I never claimed sick pay for my husband as he had been self employed originally and I didn't think he could claim. You can claim disability living allowance as dementia is recognised but to get the higher rate you have to really. really say you need help with everyday tasks. Make sure you put the very worst scenario on the forms if you do make a claim.

I do hope that you can get a bit of support as it must be so hard to be working and have these memory problems.

xxTinaT