CH wants to move our parent (funded by adult services in a private care home) to the 'dementia' floor of the nursing home. We don't feel he has deteriorated enough to warrant this move. (He struggles with his hearing and this can make him appear worse than he is). We believe it would actually be detrimental to his mental well being. Where do we stand with this? Can the care home move him to this floor even if we disagree? What can we do about it?
CH wants to move dad but we dont feel its right move for him. What can we do?
- Thread starter poo
- Start date
Hi poo, welcome to TP
I doubt the home can't make him move against his or your wishes I don't think, but I don't know.
But if they felt it necessary and the LA funding the care agreed then I'd have to wonder if their professional opinion and experience wasn't worth following.
I think the title "Dementia Floor" doesn't help, would you feel better if it was called the "High Dependency Unit" or something more user friendly?
Ultimately if the home felt keeping him where he is presented a danger to him or the staff and you wouldn't agree to the move they could ask you to take him somewhere else rather than take the risk.
If they go along with something they believe to be wrong and don't move him who would be liable if anything happened, could the home be prosecuted for not giving him the correct level of care?
I visit my wife in an acute secure unit and one thing I do see daily is how differently some of the patients are when they have a visitor and how they change when the visitor leaves and not for the better in a lot of cases.
People (staff and other visitors) tell me how much calmer my wife is when I'm there, what are they seeing that I'm not?
I take it you've visited the floor and seen what it's like, if not you should at least do that but if the home won't have it then their only option is to ask you to find another home to take him within the LA's budget unless you're willing to pay a top up fee.
K
I doubt the home can't make him move against his or your wishes I don't think, but I don't know.
But if they felt it necessary and the LA funding the care agreed then I'd have to wonder if their professional opinion and experience wasn't worth following.
I think the title "Dementia Floor" doesn't help, would you feel better if it was called the "High Dependency Unit" or something more user friendly?
Ultimately if the home felt keeping him where he is presented a danger to him or the staff and you wouldn't agree to the move they could ask you to take him somewhere else rather than take the risk.
If they go along with something they believe to be wrong and don't move him who would be liable if anything happened, could the home be prosecuted for not giving him the correct level of care?
I visit my wife in an acute secure unit and one thing I do see daily is how differently some of the patients are when they have a visitor and how they change when the visitor leaves and not for the better in a lot of cases.
People (staff and other visitors) tell me how much calmer my wife is when I'm there, what are they seeing that I'm not?
I take it you've visited the floor and seen what it's like, if not you should at least do that but if the home won't have it then their only option is to ask you to find another home to take him within the LA's budget unless you're willing to pay a top up fee.
K
Hello and welcome from me too.
Have they given you a reason? I'm wondering if he's in a mixed section of the home with residents who may have mobility rather than dementia issues, and his behaviour is causing them some distress? I have a friend who's father was similarly moved because he was going into other residents rooms and messing with their stuff and his repetitive conversation was becoming very wearing for those confined to wheelchairs who were unable to take themselves off somewhere else.
In a specialist unit this is looked on as normal and everyone accepts it, but for the other non-dementia residents, I can see this behaviour could be very trying to live with 24/7.
Forgive me if I have jumped to the wrong conclusions but I guess the staff in any home have to balance the needs of all their residents, and sometimes it can be helpful to view it from the other side's perspective.
Have they given you a reason? I'm wondering if he's in a mixed section of the home with residents who may have mobility rather than dementia issues, and his behaviour is causing them some distress? I have a friend who's father was similarly moved because he was going into other residents rooms and messing with their stuff and his repetitive conversation was becoming very wearing for those confined to wheelchairs who were unable to take themselves off somewhere else.
In a specialist unit this is looked on as normal and everyone accepts it, but for the other non-dementia residents, I can see this behaviour could be very trying to live with 24/7.
Forgive me if I have jumped to the wrong conclusions but I guess the staff in any home have to balance the needs of all their residents, and sometimes it can be helpful to view it from the other side's perspective.
Thanks for your replies
Hi. Thank you for replying to my post.
Yes, dad is currently on a mixed area of the home. However, when he first entered the home he was placed on the dementia floor. My dad is a gentle and 'shy' person who likes his own space and has never been good at mixing with others. He found the intrusion of other residents into his room and at times his bed very upsetting. He was then moved to the mixed area where he has been for 3 months. He has settled well here but I would say his memory seems to have deteriorated during this time. My concern is that we often find he has been left without his hearing aid in which means he cannot hear a thing. If then asked a question he will respond with an answer he thinks is needed rather than be rude or admit he didn't hear. Its therefore very difficult to know if his confusion is due to the dementia or lack of hearing sometimes and are not sure if this is appreciated by his carers. Hence, our concerns.
What seems to have prompted this sudden wish by the CH to move dad is that he went out into the car park by himself although he's never been directly told he cant do this(my sister and I think he went to look for us as he often sits looking out of his window for us to arrive). He was apprehended by the Deputy Manager who said my dad had ignored him calling after him (but, he did not have his hearing aid in). That said, when asking dad later if he had gone into the car park, he could not remember!
I have spoken to the Manager today who is insistent dad needs to move. Prior to moving she plans to question/assess him and fill in some forms but when asked if we can be present to reassure ourselves, we were told she doesn't want us there as it might distract him from answering. I do feel concerned about that, surely we have a right to be present?
I do know that dad will one day move to the dementia floor but just question whether its appropriate right now. I do understand the home has a duty of care for all its residents and would obviously not wish any harm to come to my dad but I also do not wish his emotional well being affected by a move. My head says one thing and my heart says another. Just want what's best for dad. Maybe I'm just pushing against the inevitable.
Hi. Thank you for replying to my post.
Yes, dad is currently on a mixed area of the home. However, when he first entered the home he was placed on the dementia floor. My dad is a gentle and 'shy' person who likes his own space and has never been good at mixing with others. He found the intrusion of other residents into his room and at times his bed very upsetting. He was then moved to the mixed area where he has been for 3 months. He has settled well here but I would say his memory seems to have deteriorated during this time. My concern is that we often find he has been left without his hearing aid in which means he cannot hear a thing. If then asked a question he will respond with an answer he thinks is needed rather than be rude or admit he didn't hear. Its therefore very difficult to know if his confusion is due to the dementia or lack of hearing sometimes and are not sure if this is appreciated by his carers. Hence, our concerns.
What seems to have prompted this sudden wish by the CH to move dad is that he went out into the car park by himself although he's never been directly told he cant do this(my sister and I think he went to look for us as he often sits looking out of his window for us to arrive). He was apprehended by the Deputy Manager who said my dad had ignored him calling after him (but, he did not have his hearing aid in). That said, when asking dad later if he had gone into the car park, he could not remember!
I have spoken to the Manager today who is insistent dad needs to move. Prior to moving she plans to question/assess him and fill in some forms but when asked if we can be present to reassure ourselves, we were told she doesn't want us there as it might distract him from answering. I do feel concerned about that, surely we have a right to be present?
I do know that dad will one day move to the dementia floor but just question whether its appropriate right now. I do understand the home has a duty of care for all its residents and would obviously not wish any harm to come to my dad but I also do not wish his emotional well being affected by a move. My head says one thing and my heart says another. Just want what's best for dad. Maybe I'm just pushing against the inevitable.
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Hmm, that's a tricky one. Presumably the main outer door isn't locked whereas the dementia will, presumably, be secure?
If that is the case, I suspect they are covering themselves in case he goes walkabout. They could be in a lot of trouble if that happened. Would they consider allowing you to sign a disclaimer saying you wouldn't hold them responsible if he went missing? (I have no idea if that would even be legal?)
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outer door
Hi
Yep that's right re the doors and we did offer to sign disclaimer but they wouldn't accept that. I do understand they have to ensure he is safe and they have said it wouldn't be fair/they couldn't 'lock in' the other residents. That said, at weekends and night time they have coded entry on the main door too which all relatives know. Also, many places, for security have locked main doors (work, schools, sheltered housing units etc.). TBH we want him to be safe too so I think, much as we don't want it, we will have to go along with the move if they insist. As he is a funded resident to move him might mean we'd have to go out of county and we really wouldn't want that.
Hi
Yep that's right re the doors and we did offer to sign disclaimer but they wouldn't accept that. I do understand they have to ensure he is safe and they have said it wouldn't be fair/they couldn't 'lock in' the other residents. That said, at weekends and night time they have coded entry on the main door too which all relatives know. Also, many places, for security have locked main doors (work, schools, sheltered housing units etc.). TBH we want him to be safe too so I think, much as we don't want it, we will have to go along with the move if they insist. As he is a funded resident to move him might mean we'd have to go out of county and we really wouldn't want that.
