Catatonic all day today. Why?

Discussion in 'End of life care' started by Splashing About, Dec 15, 2019.

  1. Splashing About

    Splashing About Registered User

    Oct 20, 2019
    354
    Well probably not the medical classification of catatonic but pretty similar. Mum just lay there quietly not responding. My daughter initially thought she had died.

    In between sleep phases (which is marked by sleep behaviour..eyes shut...visibly wakes etc) she talks a lot and rearranges the bedding, often waving her feet in the air, plucking the bedding, repetitive actions and often cross and vocal.

    Today she just stared into space. Occasional eye contact so not complete catatonia but barely anything since lunchtime. She has drunk milk when the spout is rested against her mouth.

    She’s been made ready for bed and rolled onto her side....and is lying there eyes open but unseeing. This is really not her.

    Any ideas??
     
  2. Woohoo

    Woohoo Registered User

    Apr 30, 2019
    573
    Female
    South East
    No ideas @Splashing About , I take it it’s nothing serious medically but a stage of the disease ? It sounds quite hard to witness , hope you are ok.
     
  3. Splashing About

    Splashing About Registered User

    Oct 20, 2019
    354
    I’ve googled and apparently loss of speech and loss of ability to smile or facial movements does happen. It was eerie and I guess we are always on watch for the final day so it was concerning. It’s very hard to watch someone who is dying slowly
     
  4. Woohoo

    Woohoo Registered User

    Apr 30, 2019
    573
    Female
    South East
    I can only imagine how difficult it is for you . Hope you have good support around you,Take care.
     
  5. Moggymad

    Moggymad Registered User

    May 12, 2017
    453
    Female
    When my mum became like this when in her care home it was due to having an infection/pain which was not obvious at the time. During mums time in hospital at end of life stage she did get more & more unresponsive apart from when being moved. It's difficult to know whether your mum is shutting down this time having rallied previously. All I know is that my mums food & fluid intake got less & less which led to her refusing all sustainance & eventually slipping into a similar state to what you describe. I hope she is comfortable. Sending caring thoughts & support to you. It is a very hard stage to witness. X
     
  6. Splashing About

    Splashing About Registered User

    Oct 20, 2019
    354
    That’s what bothers me. It feels like she is shutting down and I can’t bear to think she’s in distress. Then I realise I could well visit tomorrow and find her awake and wrecking the bed. It’s a constant mental balance between thinking she’s going imminently and feeling desperate and thinking she might be like this in a few months....and feeling desperate.

    I have a bad feeling about this though
     
  7. Moggymad

    Moggymad Registered User

    May 12, 2017
    453
    Female
    Could the GP come out & check her over & give you their opinion? There may be a need for 'just in case' meds for when required. I would say trust your instincts about your mum, you know her better than anyone else.
     
  8. Splashing About

    Splashing About Registered User

    Oct 20, 2019
    354
    Justin case have been written up already as far as I’m aware but I will investigate
     
  9. millalm

    millalm Registered User

    Oct 9, 2019
    53
    @splashingabout I know too well the state you are seeing and the bad feeling you are experiencing. I think the worst thing about Dementia is the wicked tricks it plays on the sufferer and their carers. It is very possible that it is just a phase that may come and go by the day. It is since March for me when my Mum had an undiagnosed illness which resulted in the very same symptoms you are describing. We were at that stage when she was taking no food and very little liquid and we were literally saying our goodbyes when she suddenly started sucking on a mouth care swab and I realized she was thirsty, so not dying after all. There have been recurring bouts over the last 9 months, including episodes with delerium lasting for 2 to 3 days. Each time I have had a bad feeling and each time I have been mistaken, even though I know my Mum as well as I know myself.

    The only ray of hope I can offer you is that with each bout I have become more accepting of the fact that eventually the day will come when she doesn't make it back. So I try to enjoy the small delights on the days when she calls my name, or responds to 'I love you'. Based on my visit last night, today I am not sure if she will see Christmas, but as you say, I might arrive tonight to find her wide eyed and bushy tailed. And so it goes.

    I wish you the strength to soldier on.
     
  10. Splashing About

    Splashing About Registered User

    Oct 20, 2019
    354
    Thank you @Moggymad and @Woohoo
    Oh yes “wicked tricks” indeed @millalm!! Today she’s the picture of rude health. Rude being the best descriptor. “Go away” was her favoured sentence and trying to hit out.

    I stayed for a short while and then took dad for a coffee where we managed to get cornered by a drunk in a cafe ...at 3:30pm swinging her glass of wine at us and being a nuisance :eek:
     
  11. Splashing About

    Splashing About Registered User

    Oct 20, 2019
    354
    So tonight I'm in A&E with Dad who fainted, hit head, bleeding from ear... await CT scan
     
  12. Moggymad

    Moggymad Registered User

    May 12, 2017
    453
    Female
    Oh no so sorry to hear about your dad. Hope he will be ok. What a turnaround with your mum! You must be feeling completely rung out emotionally. Hope you can get home to sleep tonight. Sending best wishes x
     
  13. Dimpsy

    Dimpsy Registered User

    Sep 2, 2019
    933
    Female
    I hope your dad's ok, you're worrying about your mum one minute and now your dad is in the wars, good wishes for some peace coming your way @Splashing About
     
  14. Izzy

    Izzy Volunteer Moderator

    Aug 31, 2003
    60,154
    Female
    Dundee
    Oh no. I hope your dad is ok.
     
  15. millalm

    millalm Registered User

    Oct 9, 2019
    53
    Oh no I'm so sorry, caring for two parents is exponentially harder than caring for one. You poor soul, I hope you have some company as hospital waiting is nerve racking. Let's hope he is ok.
     
  16. jugglingmum

    jugglingmum Registered User

    Jan 5, 2014
    5,399
    Female
    Chester
    Oh no sorry to hear about your dad.
     
  17. Woohoo

    Woohoo Registered User

    Apr 30, 2019
    573
    Female
    South East
    Oh no @Splashing About, sorry to hear,hope you aren't kept waiting too long and that dad is OK.
     
  18. Splashing About

    Splashing About Registered User

    Oct 20, 2019
    354
    We were in A&E until 5:45am sat in a chair all that time because 1st he needed brain CT which was fine....bleeding was a cut inside the ear canal from the fall ....wait for the results....then they’d forgotten blood tests so we waited a lot more for them to be done then wait......for results...those showed possible cardiac issues so we were referred for repeat tests....which involved Dr passing us over to an HCA (waited for her) who filled stuff in on PC and printed a form and then walked us into a different waiting area where we ....waited for a different HCA to take blood. He’s 83 and sat up all night being passed from person to person. I thought I might faint from being awake for 22 hours and not lying down and I’m younger and wasn’t there because of a dizzy spell.
     
  19. Splashing About

    Splashing About Registered User

    Oct 20, 2019
    354
    He’s had 3 hrs sleep in my daughter’s bed, breakfast and now gone back to bed. I’m missing another day of work. I'm very lucky to have tolerant workmates as this whole missing work thing has been going on for a couple of yrs or more.
     
  20. Splashing About

    Splashing About Registered User

    Oct 20, 2019
    354
    What really bothers me is the lack of an answer for the reason he collapsed. His HR went down to 47 sat being triaged. Not monitored the rest of the time. My mum had several episodes of collapse like this before getting a pacemaker. We waited 6 hrs for the ambulance in Feb despite her heart having stopped....it feels horribly dejà vu.

    GP next port of call if we can get an appointment
     

Share This Page

  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.
  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.