Care Homes - They are all your fault!

[LYN T]

Hi Sharon

I woke up (still cross) because I wish I had made further points in my email. Luckily the points I had missed out were all covered in your email.(always knew TPers were as one)

 

[gringo]

Mr. Lamb is a kind-hearted man
He says we should look after our Gran
He thinks we’ve no heart
And won’t play our part
And thats when the s**t hit the fan.

 

[Skye]

Well done, LYN T. Your email is excellent - concise and to the point. I do hope he reads it, and is interested enough to read this thread.

My lovely husband ended his life in a care home. becaus I was physically incapable of giving him the care he needed, and SS had not the resources to provide the help I needed. One of the saddest days of my life was the day I had to leave him there. It broke my heart.

What came through your email to me was not bitterness, just anger and sheer despair. Not content with withdrawing resources that would help us, they now seek to blame us for their failings.

 

[Shash7677]

Thanks Lyn,

I had to Re write bits of it for fear of being hit with a law suit! Write emotive initially then Re read and write with your head has always been my policy.

Would have liked to have called him an insensitive armhole with no compassion and evidently no experience of dealing with elderly people! You would think, being an MP for Norfolk he would be a bit more sensitive, my nan and grandad lives and does in Norfolk, old people out number young by about 15:1!!!!!

Sharon

 

[LYN T]

Mr. Lamb is a kind-hearted man
He says we should look after our Gran
He thinks we’ve no heart
And won’t play our part
And thats when the s**t hit the fan.

That's made me smile Gringo.Thanks! Your quirky humour always cheers me up

Love from Lyn T

 

[tre]

I agree with everything that has been said. I cannot believe Mr Lamb has any experience of caring for someone with dementia. If he would like to have his eyes opened he can come around to my house at any time.

He would do well to look at some of the threads on this website regarding care homes from which he would learn that most people do their utmost to put off their loved one going into care homes.

What an idiot

Tre

 

[LYN T]

Thanks Lyn,

I had to Re write bits of it for fear of being hit with a law suit! Write emotive initially then Re read and write with your head has always been my policy.



Sharon

OOPs! I wish I had read this before I sent a copy to my MP!-with an additional message!

Oh well can't retrieve it now.From now on I'm going to follow this helpful strategy.

Thank you

Lyn T

 

[Shash7677]

Lyn your e mail was fab. I basically called the bloke an idiot but not in so many words. Thought maybe that was true, but potentially the point at which he would stop reading. If in fact he does read them and they aren't vetted by someone before they get to him!

Sharon

 

[CraigC]

Norman Lamb justs need to admin that the chancellor is not going to give his department the money to deal with elderly care both in the home and in the care home setting. Come up with a decent alternative instead of blaming everyone else.

Happy new year to you too Norman Lamb and lets hope you never find yourself in the difficult position of looking after someone you love and having to make such difficult choices. The blame goes firmly on the state. Improve support at home and standards of care instead of shouting soundbites.

Now I've got that out of my system there is a another more interesting comment hidden away.

Mr Lamb also said the Coalition had agreed to cap care costs, with an announcement due this month.

Hopefully something will be announced in January.

 

[Onlyme]

I love how we are supposed to be leaving these relatives in care homes. Getting them in in the first place would be fine thing! We have to fight the SW who say there isn't a problem, wait months if not years for a diagnosis and memory clinic, and then have to sell the family home to pay for care as there is no other help and our health is at risk and lie to our loved ones about what we have done with their house.

This twit makes it sound as if we decide that from tomorrow we can't fit in caring inbetween our nailbar appointments, roll up to a care home and wheel in the relative and the taxpayer foots the bill.

I really hope that he gets dragged off to work as a carer for 3 days solidly and see how he likes it.

 

[Shash7677]

Heaven forbid he should ever get alzheimers, dementia, Parkinson's or anything else for that matter and he need caring for. Won't be so bloody smug them will he!

 

[TinaT]

Here's my copy of the e mail I sent:

I am writing regarding the recent article I read in the Times newspaper and the statement from you that we, relatives and neighbours cause our sick and elderly relatives to be placed into residential settings.
He highlighted work done by ........ city council, which has encouraged residents, including the elderly, to “self-manage” health conditions.

I have spent the last twn I am writing regarding the recent article I read in the Times newspaper and the statement from you that we, relatives and neighbours cause our sickl and elderly relartives to be placed into residential settings.
He highlighted work done by ....... city council, which has encouraged residents, including the elderly, to “self-manage” health conditions.

I have spent the last ten years of my life caring for my husband who suffered from Lewy Body Disease (a form of dementia). He was not sick and elderly at the time this illness struck. He was a fit and healthy 57 years old man who was suddenly and devastatingly was unable to walk, feed or care in any way for himself. This disease also creates behaviour including violence and hallucinations. He ended his life in a dementia care home because it became impossible for him to be cared for at home, by myself 24/7. I had a very small amount of help from my local authority. Have you have ever tried to use a hoist in a bathroom which you could not swing a cat in, and in a tiny house where 24/7 care is constantly present.

I now have to care for my 87 year old mother suffering from late stage Alzheimer Disease. I would invite you as the Lib Dem Minister to come and assess my mother and her ability to self manage any aspect of her life, from taking tablets (which she will not) to changing her own incontinence pads and a million other things.

I am not alone I can assure you in having had two people to care for at once. Please do visit the Alzheimer website and log in to the 'Talking Point' forum. You will see countless examples of people in similar situations to myself and the consequences of having to give 24.7 care.

The fact that relatives have to go into a residential setting has nothing whatsoever to do with an uncaring attitude. Far from it.

You state that: ...... City Council have a magic wand approach and can keep elderly frail people in their own homes. You do not mention dementia and the myriad problems this brings and how such a model council copes with these demands. I would really like a detailed account written by a carer of end stage dementia and how this is achievable.

All his policy you advocate will do is fill up hospital beds with permanent, chronic mental and physical illness which needs 24/7 management.

I presume from this policy that you have never lived with the hourly worry which 24/7 caring in a home setting entails. Most of the posters on Talking Point do have first hand experience. Again please take a look at any typical daily posts. You may learn something!

I would ask that you please reply to this e mail. I have taken the time out of my day of caring (which is far busier than you can ever imagine) to write this and I would appreciate the curtsey of a considered reply from yourself.



I've sent this to both his Norfolk consituancy e mail address and his Parliamentary e mail address.

xxTinaT

 

[TinaT]

Sorry I seem to have posted this twice - would the mods please delete the first of the two.

xxTinaT

 

[LYN T]

Hi Tina

Brilliant email.That should set him straight.

The man is a buffoon.I hope more people can find the time to inundate him with complaints-although where carers will get the energy from to do so I don't know.I only managed to write because my OH is in an assessment unit at the moment.Does this make me 'uncaring' as I 'pushed' him to be sectioned? Should I have put up with the violence and asked a neighbour to come in and sit with him while I did my shopping etc?Perhaps I should have asked for help from Mr Lamb? Hmmmm! probably not! I don't think he is into even thinking about wiping a bottom let alone doing it!

Well done you for finding the time.

Love from Lyn T

 

[Shash7677]

Fantastic Tina

Sharon

 

[grove]

Well Said Tina T

Hello Everybody , Have kept quiet on this Thread untill now only because was not sure which Party Mr Lamb belonged to ! However after reading Tina 's FAB Thread / E Mail it all became clear


It will be very interesting to see if this Story is talked about on the Today Programme & Tina T should be the T P Rep to interveiw Mr Lamb & explain to him what 's its realley like to be a full time Carer for a loved one with Dementia / Altz etc

Agree with what has been said on here & am that he ( Mr Lamb ) has made these silly / stupid comments ! He is a TWIT ! & just a thought is this HIS Veiw or the Offical Veiw of the Govt ? Any ideas any body please ?


My Dad has Moderate Dementia & Mum cares for him full time very well & as best she can but am sure she would not expect friend 's & neighbour 's to help care for Dad nor would I want Mum helping to Care for other 's ( neighbour 's etc ) who have Dementia etc



Love Grove x

 

[LYN T]

Hello Everybody , Have kept quiet on this Thread untill now only because was not sure which Party Mr Lamb belonged to ! However after reading Tina 's FAB Thread / E Mail it all became clear


It will be very interesting to see if this Story is talked about on the Today Programme & Tina T should be the T P Rep to interveiw Mr Lamb & explain to him what 's its realley like to be a full time Carer for a loved one with Dementia / Altz etc

Agree with what has been said on here & am that he ( Mr Lamb ) has made these silly / stupid comments ! He is a TWIT ! & just a thought is this HIS Veiw or the Offical Veiw of the Govt ? Any ideas any body please ?


My Dad has Moderate Dementia & Mum cares for him full time very well & as best she can but am sure she would not expect friend 's & neighbour 's to help care for Dad nor would I want Mum helping to Care for other 's ( neighbour 's etc ) who have Dementia etc



Love Grove x

Hi Grove

Good points here. I agree Tina T should give him a grilling.

I didn't think to ask if it is the twit's view or an official one.

Lyn T

 

[grove]

For Lyn T

Hello Lyn T , Thank you very much for your supportive reply & glad you like my points , just some more points ( see below ) :


**** Has D Cameron or N Clegg made a "Offical Reply " to this ?


**** If it was discussed on the Today Programme can put a 100 per cent bet on that Mr Lamb TWIT ! ..... would REFUSE to go onto the Today Programme ! !


**** How can you find out if its the Offical Govt veiw ? or just the veiw of Mr Lamb 's ? ( Any ideas any body please ? ...... thank you )


Love Grove x x

 

[LYN T]

Hello Lyn T , Thank you very much for your supportive reply & glad you like my points , just some more points ( see below ) :


**** Has D Cameron or N Clegg made a "Offical Reply " to this ?


**** If it was discussed on the Today Programme can put a 100 per cent bet on that Mr Lamb TWIT ! ..... would REFUSE to go onto the Today Programme ! !


**** How can you find out if its the Offical Govt veiw ? or just the veiw of Mr Lamb 's ? ( Any ideas any body please ? ...... thank you )


Love Grove x x

Hi Grove

Later today I will have a quick look to see if there is anything on the net.(I have more time than most of you at the moment as Pete is being assessed in MH unit.) If I can't find anything do you think it's a good idea to forward my email to Clegg/Cameron
asking them what the official view is?It will give me a break from packing up the house and worrying about Pete.

The Twit on the Today programme! Never! If Tina T was there he would leave the studio anyway!!!!!

Lyn T

 

[Navara]

Can we add a warning to the title of this thread

"Not Suitable for Readers with High Blood Pressure"?