Hi. Mum is 87 years old and lives alone. She has a carer go in once a day to give her a hot meal, cup of tea and leave her with a drink and cake for later. Mum cannot work the kettle, radio or tv. She is known to forget to put trousers on and stand outside on her balcony fortunately so far with a coat covering her up. On colder days she will go out without a coat ever when it was -1 degrees. Personal hygiene has gone out the window. We visit when we can but that would still be only 2 drinks a day. She will not eat or drink without it being put in front of her and encouraged to eat. She has started to wander and neighbours are starting to call us more often. We are just starting the Social Services route. What can we expect from their initial visits, say Mum refuses this help where do we stand. We have POAs in place but the health and safety one doesn't seem to allow us to make the decisions regarding where she lives. Do we have to wait for something serious to happen to her? She doesn't work the kettle now but it wasn't so long ago that she was putting milk in it to boil or boiling the kettles dry. Nobody wants to put a loved one in a care home but how can the situation she is in be right, she is lonely, depressed, is not recognising her surroundings anymore and sits there staring into space all day. She is 'fine' when we visit and we leave the radio and tv on but we know she switches it off after we leave. My stress levels are through the roof worrying about her. Growing up she always said to me 'please don't put me in a home' but I am thinking this is the best place for her.