My husband first became ill last August. At first we all thought he was just depressed and he was being treated for depression and anxiety. But I started to feel it was maybe dementia when he began to get confused and forgetful and then imagining things were happening which were not. He was still not diagnosed until June this year after 10 months of living with him being verbally abusive and drinking every night (he said to relieve his stress) but of course it just made him more depressed and abusive. I know that it was not his fault and that it is the illness that makes him say hurtful things but it got so that I did not feel safe anymore and my children were also concerned for my safety. In June he was taken into an assessment unit where he was diagnosed as having mixed dementia and it was a huge relief for me although he does not know that he has dementia as he has no mental capacity now and cannot remember where he lives. Its all happened very fast. He is on a lot of medication and after lots of different types they have managed to get him a bit calmer. He is on Section 3 as he has managed to abscond twice although it is a locked in unit but he is still very fit and strong for his age and he still wants to drink. The time has come to decide what happens on his discharge and I am struggling very hard with this decision. He wants to come home and my two children want him home, but the hospital team seem to think that I will find it too difficult to cope with, even with carers coming in daily. We have been happily married for 52 years and I am desperately lonely now, living alone the past five months, but at the same time I am extremely worried about him coming home again especially remembering how things were before he went in hospital. I feel it would be better if he went into care and was professionally looked after and yet I am full of guilt at letting him and my family down by not looking after him at home. I know I have to make the decision and it is different for everyone but I would appreciate any feedback or advice from fellow sufferers from this awful desease.