Hello. I am new to the Forum today. Mum died last November and, whilst I have not been too bad, this last week or so I feel really down. Mum had dementia and was in the late stages. The problems I encountered with Mum's care home are stuck in my head and I feel I should do something about it.
I received a telephone call in the middle of the night in October 2016 informing me that Mum had fallen in her room and an ambulance had been called. I raced up to the hospital and Mum had only just arrived when I got there. A carer from the home was with Mum but couldn't tell me what had happened. The carer left as soon as I arrived.
As soon as the nurses attended Mum they said she had a severe water infection as they could smell it. They started Mum on two lots of antibiotics. Mum had also broken her hip and this was to be fixed asap within a few hours.
I rang the home four times to ask what had happened and nobody would tell me anything at all. During the fifth telephone call I was told Mum's alarm had gone off (Mum didn't have an alarm!!) and she was found on the floor by her bathroom. Mum had banged her head and was bleeding from the wound.
To try and cut a long story short, Mum had her hip operation which was successful but she would not eat or drink.
A member of staff visited Mum in hospital to assess whether she could come back to the care home and it was agreed she could. When I next spoke to the Manager of the care home, I was told Mum could not go back to the care home because "they couldn't meet her needs". I again spoke to the hospital and they said Mum couldn't stay there. I visited the care home to try to have a conversation with the senior member of staff on that day and was shouted at in Reception. "We can not have her back here". I had to contact the hospital again and they suggested a nearby Hospice. The next day, I had a telephone call from the care home saying that "Mum is on her way back and they CAN meet her needs as Mum now needs palliative care".
My partner and I went straight there and Mum was just arriving in an ambulance. We stayed with her all night and she passed away at 7.45am.
The staff at the care home were running around like headless chickens and called the Police because they couldn't keep Mum there and I hadn't a funeral director in place. The Police arrived and said they shouldn't have been called so they weren't happy. The Police sent for a paramedic to confirm Mum's death as Mum's GP was on holiday and no-one else would come out from the surgery.
Anyway, I could go on and on. I was in email discussion with the manager of the care home whilst all this was happening but I felt I was being dismissed. I feel that if Mum hadn't had a water infection she may not have fallen and would still be here although I know she wasn't happy during her last few weeks. I visited Mum the day before I got the telephone call during the night and told a member of staff Mum was rubbing her tummy and crying and I was told "she's ok - she gets like this". That same night, Mum fell.
I am SO sorry to waffle on but I feel I should be reporting this to someone in authority. Is it too late? I am really struggling to draw a line under it all and move on.
Any thoughts anyone please? I would be so grateful xxx
I received a telephone call in the middle of the night in October 2016 informing me that Mum had fallen in her room and an ambulance had been called. I raced up to the hospital and Mum had only just arrived when I got there. A carer from the home was with Mum but couldn't tell me what had happened. The carer left as soon as I arrived.
As soon as the nurses attended Mum they said she had a severe water infection as they could smell it. They started Mum on two lots of antibiotics. Mum had also broken her hip and this was to be fixed asap within a few hours.
I rang the home four times to ask what had happened and nobody would tell me anything at all. During the fifth telephone call I was told Mum's alarm had gone off (Mum didn't have an alarm!!) and she was found on the floor by her bathroom. Mum had banged her head and was bleeding from the wound.
To try and cut a long story short, Mum had her hip operation which was successful but she would not eat or drink.
A member of staff visited Mum in hospital to assess whether she could come back to the care home and it was agreed she could. When I next spoke to the Manager of the care home, I was told Mum could not go back to the care home because "they couldn't meet her needs". I again spoke to the hospital and they said Mum couldn't stay there. I visited the care home to try to have a conversation with the senior member of staff on that day and was shouted at in Reception. "We can not have her back here". I had to contact the hospital again and they suggested a nearby Hospice. The next day, I had a telephone call from the care home saying that "Mum is on her way back and they CAN meet her needs as Mum now needs palliative care".
My partner and I went straight there and Mum was just arriving in an ambulance. We stayed with her all night and she passed away at 7.45am.
The staff at the care home were running around like headless chickens and called the Police because they couldn't keep Mum there and I hadn't a funeral director in place. The Police arrived and said they shouldn't have been called so they weren't happy. The Police sent for a paramedic to confirm Mum's death as Mum's GP was on holiday and no-one else would come out from the surgery.
Anyway, I could go on and on. I was in email discussion with the manager of the care home whilst all this was happening but I felt I was being dismissed. I feel that if Mum hadn't had a water infection she may not have fallen and would still be here although I know she wasn't happy during her last few weeks. I visited Mum the day before I got the telephone call during the night and told a member of staff Mum was rubbing her tummy and crying and I was told "she's ok - she gets like this". That same night, Mum fell.
I am SO sorry to waffle on but I feel I should be reporting this to someone in authority. Is it too late? I am really struggling to draw a line under it all and move on.
Any thoughts anyone please? I would be so grateful xxx