My mother-in-law has advanced mixed dementia and recently started losing weight despite eating reasonably well. She also has frequent loose stools. She would be frightened by any invasive or painful testing and I’m wondering how they would go about investigating her. It might be nothing but obviously there is the fear of bowel cancer. Any experiences welcome thanks
Cancer symptoms
- Thread starter Maig9
- Start date
You need to think what the implications of having her tested would be if the outcome was something not so good.
in other words, would the rigours of testing be worth it, if you didnt think she would be able to go through treatment.
Bluntly- is there any point in knowing?
in other words, would the rigours of testing be worth it, if you didnt think she would be able to go through treatment.
Bluntly- is there any point in knowing?
Hello @Maig9
A warm welcome to DTP
Personally I'd have a chat with your mother in law's GP and ask for her to be checked over as there may be other causes of both symptoms and the GP will discuss any tests they think may be useful ... at that point you can consider how she will cope with them ... too early to jump to conclusions ... but you are concerned, so talk with the GP to maybe set your mind at rest
A warm welcome to DTP
Personally I'd have a chat with your mother in law's GP and ask for her to be checked over as there may be other causes of both symptoms and the GP will discuss any tests they think may be useful ... at that point you can consider how she will cope with them ... too early to jump to conclusions ... but you are concerned, so talk with the GP to maybe set your mind at rest
My dad lost a lot of weight, 4 stone in 4 months. His appetite had gone and he ate less and less. He had tests but everything was negative so I could not understand it. Then he started vomiting after only a mouthful of food so his GP got him an urgent endoscopy and we found that he had oesophageal cancer and he could no longer physically swallow food.
Dad was 87 and very frail and they would not give him any invasive treatment like an operation or chemo. His oncologist said that he would not withstand either and we agreed but they did give him a stent so that he could eat again and he lived quite happily for another two years. This was a simple procedure that dad was not even aware of as he was sedated.
If your MIL is eating quite well then she is not likely to have the same cancer as my dad which is good. You don't say how old she is but in my experience the medics are reluctant to perform invasive tests on the elderly, others may have different views. Dad had palliative treatment and he was happy with it and to be honest it was very good. They took a watch and wait approach and dad had a better outcome than some of the younger patients who had the full treatment of operation and chemo.
I agree with @Shedrech that it would be a good idea to get her GP to check her over in case it is something else, he is not likely to do anything invasive to her but he might find something that can be treated simply.
In my dads case he certainly benefitted from knowing and a very simple procedure improved his life and gave him another two years.
Dad was 87 and very frail and they would not give him any invasive treatment like an operation or chemo. His oncologist said that he would not withstand either and we agreed but they did give him a stent so that he could eat again and he lived quite happily for another two years. This was a simple procedure that dad was not even aware of as he was sedated.
If your MIL is eating quite well then she is not likely to have the same cancer as my dad which is good. You don't say how old she is but in my experience the medics are reluctant to perform invasive tests on the elderly, others may have different views. Dad had palliative treatment and he was happy with it and to be honest it was very good. They took a watch and wait approach and dad had a better outcome than some of the younger patients who had the full treatment of operation and chemo.
I agree with @Shedrech that it would be a good idea to get her GP to check her over in case it is something else, he is not likely to do anything invasive to her but he might find something that can be treated simply.
In my dads case he certainly benefitted from knowing and a very simple procedure improved his life and gave him another two years.
Thanks for all the replies, really helpful and appreciated.
She is 80 and quite frail so I don’t think we would go for very aggressive treatment, as you have all said it’s quality of life and keeping her comfortable but I think we do need to try and clarify what’s going on, starting with the least invasive tests. Will chat with gp.
Duggies-girl What is quite startling is how long your dad survived comfortably without active treatment. Particularly in comparison with younger people getting chemo. Something to consider for all of us.
She is 80 and quite frail so I don’t think we would go for very aggressive treatment, as you have all said it’s quality of life and keeping her comfortable but I think we do need to try and clarify what’s going on, starting with the least invasive tests. Will chat with gp.
Duggies-girl What is quite startling is how long your dad survived comfortably without active treatment. Particularly in comparison with younger people getting chemo. Something to consider for all of us.
His oncologist said that he was the perfect advert for palliative care for the elderly and he was. He was already stage 3 and in poor health when diagnosed and we expected another 3 to 6 months but I fed him up with scrambled egg and double cream and he put almost all of his weight back on and thrived. Of course it got him in the end but he was well and happy for a long time. Palliative care is about the well being of the patient, he could have anything to keep him comfortable but nothing that could harm him. I am always grateful to his consultant.
My dad has mixed dementia. It's not really advanced but is getting worse. He had a blood test recently and was found to have anemia. They did a second blood test a couple of weeks after checking for cancer markers and the doctor has said it's bowel cancer. Due to him already being frail, she/we agreed that we will monitor rather than putting dad through a lot of tests as it will only confirm it but nothing could be done for it. It is heartbreaking and dad doesn't know, his choice from many years ago. It would serve no purpose him knowing at this stage in his life. Regular blood tests and monitoring is all we can do. Sending love and hugs your way. I know it's not easy I really do x
