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Can I stop someone visiting my Mum?

Discussion in 'Legal and financial issues' started by Beark, Jul 14, 2019.

  1. Beark

    Beark New member

    Jul 14, 2019
    I have LPA for my mum but need to stop my brother and niece from visiting, do I have the power to do this even if she wants to see them as she has dementia and believes they are looking after her. They have financially abused her and mentally abused her feeding her lies and false information for a while and this is having a negative effect on her wellbeing.
  2. canary

    canary Registered User

    Feb 25, 2014
    South coast
    Hello @Beark and welcome to DTP.

    Whether you can stop someone from visiting depends, I would say, very much on where they are living.

    If your mum is living with you, or you are living with her, then I think you can just refuse them entry.
    If your mum is living in a care home, them you can talk to the manager and explain they you dont want them to visit.
    If your mum is living by herself in her own home, then I think this will be very difficult to enforce. You can ask them not to visit, but they would probably just ignore you.
  3. Rosettastone57

    Rosettastone57 Registered User

    Oct 27, 2016
    Others will be along soon with better advice, but having power of attorney, per se won't give you authority to prevent visits . As others have said, it depends on the situation. Perhaps further information from you might help forum members to give a view
  4. silversea2020

    silversea2020 Registered User

    May 12, 2019
    I had a similar problem with my ‘invisible’ sibling who only visited mom at home when he ‘wanted’ money. He successfully emptied her bank A/C when he said he’d go get her some cash after she’d come out of hospital & she was unable to get to the bank. He did not have a key to mom’s property as she didn’t trust him but of course she would let him in etc. I could not prevent him visiting mom - POA does not give you power stopping someone visiting.

    However, when mom went into the care home, the manager was told what had happened when mom was at home & they listened to my concerns. They ensured that mom (at long last gave her bank cards&cheque book to me - I put them in our safe), mum wasn’t too happy about it but I explained she didn’t need any money but gave her a small amount of cash so that kept her happy. The brother never did bother visiting his mum once she went into care home - it was the end of mum being financially abused
  5. Sirena

    Sirena Registered User

    Feb 27, 2018
    As Canary says, it depends entirely on the circumstances.
    You don't have any 'power' as such. Realistically it is likely to be a practical rather than legal issue. You can refuse to let them enter your house, or ask a care home to refuse admission, but how well that works depends on how persistent they are likely to be.
  6. nitram

    nitram Registered User

    Apr 6, 2011
    North Manchester
    Ultimately, except perhaps in the case of refusing them contact with your mum when she is in your house, and assuming she lacks capacity, a formal best Interests meeting will have to be called to decide what access they have.
  7. Sirena

    Sirena Registered User

    Feb 27, 2018
    Yes I agree, if they oppose your decision they could involve SS and request a best interests meeting. Depends how invested they are.
    I had a slightly different situation. The care home manager told me last year that someone had asked via SS where my mother now lived, and would I like him to be told. I said no, so she refused to divulge. She said he could appeal the decision and would probably be given the information. So far we have heard no more, presumably because there wasn't really anything in it for him.
  8. Louise7

    Louise7 Registered User

    Mar 25, 2016

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