Feeling utterly guilty and sad this morning. To-day is OH`s landmark 80th birthday, and I haven`t got him anything ( except a large box of chocolates which he loves ) and a card. He no longer has any interests ( he was once an ardent philatelist ), and he never wants to go anywhere ( has difficulty walking far for long due to emphysema). His 3 daughters are coming to see him on Saturday (they live over 100 miles away), but no other relatives of his bother to contact us now. He has only had 2 other birthday cards. We always celebrated birthdays by going somewhere, doing something and buying each other something special, but now I just can not think what we can do or what else I can get him. Just wish I had a magic wand which I could wave to make his dementia disappear!
Birthday wish.....
- Thread starter Anthoula
- Start date
It`s so sad @Anthoula
We also always made a big deal of birthdays and those celebrations were sadly missed.
Will your OH respond to a small cake with a candle? My husband loved that. It always brought a smile to his face, even though he hadn`t the strength or understanding to blow the candle out.
We also always made a big deal of birthdays and those celebrations were sadly missed.
Will your OH respond to a small cake with a candle? My husband loved that. It always brought a smile to his face, even though he hadn`t the strength or understanding to blow the candle out.
I really do feel for you @Anthoula and can empathise with how you are feeling. Special occasions like birthdays and Christmas are just not the same when our loved ones have dementia. But the main thing is that you have remembered and you bought something that your husband will enjoy, the chocolates.
I will have to monitor the chocolate eating, otherwise the box will be devoured in a very short space of time!
Days like these are really sad aren't they. He already has the greatest gift of your time, love and compassion. My dad will be getting sweets and a favourite meal cooked with pudding after. It's only an idea but there are some interesting monthly subscription boxes of sweets and snacks available on the internet. It's always nice to get a treat through the post! I bought a friend one and she gets a box from a different country each month with an explanatory leaflet that is aimed at kids.
I'm sorry to hear you're feeling this way. Sometimes the best gift is just being there and showing you care. Take care of yourself, too.
Thank you everyone. It has been a "contented" day. OH was over the moon with the card I gave him, proudly showing it to 2 friends when they visited this afternoon. He thoroughly enjoyed his chocolate birthday cake (shop bought I confess!), and was delighted when his sister phoned from Johannesburg. So all in all a far better day than expected.
