As some on here may be aware, for me its been nearly a year since My father died and i was left to pick up the pieces of my mothers illness Which my father hid and hid well. Its been a long year, its been a hard year, trying to care for mun and cope with bringing up a young family, to say its been a juggle of emmotions is an understatement. I am and i describe my self as the reluctant carer, because i didnt ask for this and i dont particularly like it, but shes my mum and i cant and wont give up on her. Yesterday i went to the doctor!!! And it's looking serious... Ive got to go back and have more blood tests on monday to confirm But what do i do now Im 44, with a 13 year old, an 11 year ol with autism and tourettes, and a hubby who i Love dearly but rarely see. And what about mum Im in a daze.