Assessment for my Mum

[Bugsy123]

Dear all
I am totally new to this. So bear with me as I have very little knowledge. My 89 year old Mum is remarkable. In the last 6 months we have noticed the following, repeatedly asking the same questions, forgetting people places, disinhibition and sometimes just rude! Low in mood. She cares for herself at home with a carer going in 4 x week to help with cleaning and shopping. She is fiercely independent but I am very worried about her as she is changing in front of my eyes. I would like to get her assessed privately but am wondering if she does get assessed can they actually do anything. She’s agreed to go and see someone. Can someone help in starting this process or am I over reacting. I just don’t want it to get worse and be too late to help. Thanks so much for reading this. I can’t bear to see her get depressed and disoriented.

 

[karaokePete]

Dear all
I am totally new to this. So bear with me as I have very little knowledge. My 89 year old Mum is remarkable. In the last 6 months we have noticed the following, repeatedly asking the same questions, forgetting people places, disinhibition and sometimes just rude! Low in mood. She cares for herself at home with a carer going in 4 x week to help with cleaning and shopping. She is fiercely independent but I am very worried about her as she is changing in front of my eyes. I would like to get her assessed privately but am wondering if she does get assessed can they actually do anything. She’s agreed to go and see someone. Can someone help in starting this process or am I over reacting. I just don’t want it to get worse and be too late to help. Thanks so much for reading this. I can’t bear to see her get depressed and disoriented.

You mention a carer going in; is your mum already under the care of a GP for her problems? If not I would take her to her GP for a start and then if a problem is detected a referral can be made for you/her. The symptoms can be caused by other, treatable, medical issues so the GP is the right place to start.

 

[karaokePete]

BTW, welcome to TP. You will find the forum a friendly and informative place.

 

[Shedrech]

hello @Bugsy123
welcome to TP
you are clearly concerned for your mum, so definitely best to get a professional opinion to put your mind at ease and/or get to the bottom of what seems to be wrong
you are fortunate that your mum is agreeing to go and see someone, as many people are not able to see that anything is wrong so do not want to see a medic
so I agree, make an appointment with her GP for the 2 of you to go and chat things over - the GP will run tests to rule out a variety of causes of the symptoms you describe - what you might do to help the GP is write a list of all the things that are concerning you and all the changes you see in your mu eg think of her 1,2,3 years ago and the tasks she has trouble with now that she did easily then - send the list to her GP before the appointment so that they have a chance to look it over before they speak with your mum
probably better to see her GP than anyone private, so that your concerns are immediately in 'the system' and the GP can make any referrals necessary
one tip - do go with your mum into the GP's room, sit so that she can only see your face if she turns to you but the GP can see you easily - then if your mum says something that isn't as you see it, make sure your expression lets the GP know this so they know that your mum isn't giving the full story

 

[Bugsy123]

You mention a carer going in; is your mum already under the care of a GP for her problems? If not I would take her to her GP for a start and then if a problem is detected a referral can be made for you/her. The symptoms can be caused by other, treatable, medical issues so the GP is the right place to start.

Thank you I’m going to book the appointment.

 

[Bugsy123]

hello @Bugsy123
welcome to TP
you are clearly concerned for your mum, so definitely best to get a professional opinion to put your mind at ease and/or get to the bottom of what seems to be wrong
you are fortunate that your mum is agreeing to go and see someone, as many people are not able to see that anything is wrong so do not want to see a medic
so I agree, make an appointment with her GP for the 2 of you to go and chat things over - the GP will run tests to rule out a variety of causes of the symptoms you describe - what you might do to help the GP is write a list of all the things that are concerning you and all the changes you see in your mu eg think of her 1,2,3 years ago and the tasks she has trouble with now that she did easily then - send the list to her GP before the appointment so that they have a chance to look it over before they speak with your mum
probably better to see her GP than anyone private, so that your concerns are immediately in 'the system' and the GP can make any referrals necessary
one tip - do go with your mum into the GP's room, sit so that she can only see your face if she turns to you but the GP can see you easily - then if your mum says something that isn't as you see it, make sure your expression lets the GP know this so they know that your mum isn't giving the full story

Thank you for your comments. You made me giggle saying to raise my eyebrows when she talks nonsense. I realise I’ve been doing this for the last year! I’m going to make the appointment and have a read around here. Thank you