Another Hospital Visit, Another Dr

Discussion in 'Younger people with dementia and their carers' started by Deeessex, Oct 1, 2007.

  1. Deeessex

    Deeessex Registered User

    Jul 16, 2007
    36
    Essex
    Hi All
    Just need to say my husband, daughter and I visited the hospital today for a follow up as he has now been on Aricept for 3 months. We knew we were going to see a different Dr as the previous one had left I'm sorry to say. The one we saw, my husband took an instant dislike to as he virtually spoke to him in a dismissive child like way. I could see my husband bristling and after my daughter spoke about driving he was angriy with her for mentioning it . The Dr managed him in a manner that negated his feelings and made him feel more resentful towards him. My daughter and I are both Health Professionals and were astonished at this Drs approach but felt almost powerless to challenge. I was angry with myself for not squaring up to him and feel as though my husband was betrayed by me. My resolve is to ask to see the consultant next time and not someone who has little skills in engaging effectively with people. I am ashamed that as a Health professional of many years some treat people like this, like their time is soooooo important and ours is not. What they have to say is right and what my husband has to say is not. Arghhhhhhh
    What happens at Medical School???????? Personality and empathy extraction???? I know its not all so as our previous Dr had developed a good rapport with my husband . I sincerely hope I am alone with this problem
    Sorry about the rant
    Denise:eek:
     
  2. Grannie G

    Grannie G Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 3, 2006
    68,731
    Kent
    Dear Denise,
    The only way you can get any action is to write a letter of complaint to the hospital and the consultant.
    Formal letters of complaint are taken notice of. No-one should be treated in such a dismissive manner.
    Please post back, if you do.
    Love xx
     
  3. Deeessex

    Deeessex Registered User

    Jul 16, 2007
    36
    Essex
    Hi Sylvia
    I know thats the way forward but having recently been through that process on behalf of my father for a different service I am feeling a bit loathed to put myself through it again . Defeatist I know but it took over a year to get a response to my fathers complaint and that was with harrassment from myself at every opportunity. I know it makes sense but need to reserve my energy for the things that I can change and rightly or wrongly I will insist on seeing the consultant next time and progress to complaining if we receive the same service. I will make him aware though of his junior member of staffs handling of my husband.
    Thanks for your response
    Denise
     
  4. Skye

    Skye Registered User

    Aug 29, 2006
    17,000
    SW Scotland
    Hi Denise, I think that's the best way forward for you. I would write to the consultant now and explain how unhappy you were at the patronising way your father was treated, and ask for an appointment with the consultant to discuss your father's care.

    You could also point out that you don't want to make an official complaint for the present.

    I agree with you, the attitude of some doctors leaves a lot to be desired. I had to do this with one of the doctors on John's ward. I have to say, her attitude changed immediately!

    Let us know how you get on.

    Love,
     
  5. jackie1

    jackie1 Registered User

    Jun 6, 2007
    238
    Cheshire
    #5 jackie1, Oct 1, 2007
    Last edited: Oct 1, 2007
    I am so sorry that you and your husband have had such an awful experience and I can only agree with what Hazel has suggested.

    I think that we have been lucky in that everyone we have seen has been lovely.

    Jackie
     
  6. Deeessex

    Deeessex Registered User

    Jul 16, 2007
    36
    Essex
    Hi All
    Just to update you - following our disasterous hospital visit I rang the consultants secretary and requested we saw the consultant on our next visit. I explained why and she was empatic. Low and behold 1 hour later the consultant rang me directly himself saying they were in the difficult situation of having locums covering the service which he acknowledged was not best for the individual or the service. He agreed to us meeting with him next time and sounded very responsive to our needs.
    Thank you to all those who encouraged me to deal with this head on - It worked !
    Some faith in services has been restored.
    Denise
     
  7. Skye

    Skye Registered User

    Aug 29, 2006
    17,000
    SW Scotland
    Well done, Denise. I hope your next appointment is more satisfactory.

    Love,
     
  8. Grannie G

    Grannie G Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 3, 2006
    68,731
    Kent
    Well done Denise. It shows how important it is to stand up for ourselves.

    Love xx
     
  9. jackie1

    jackie1 Registered User

    Jun 6, 2007
    238
    Cheshire
    Well done, I am glad you are now receiving a better service.
     

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