Hi I'm a new user and I'm wondering if I'm normal! My mum died in her nursing home a month ago having suffered with Alzheimers for past 9 years the last 2 being awful for us as she didn't know any of us. I used to visit her often, taking her for walks in a wheelchair, reading to her etc. I was on holiday in Jamaica when she died and I feel so guilty that I wasn't there, as I say its a month since she passed and I still wake up thinking I'll go and visit her in a little while and then I remember, I keep telling myself she is in a better place but I still have a "lump/knot" in my stomach and an empty useless feeling, nothing interests me is this normal?