I'm looking after my mum and she is in denial about her dementia, sadly. She is a very stern, independent woman, in her 70s. The last two years things have been getting progressively worse such as mum asking for the return for things she has given as gifts/presents or handing down of baby items saying they were never gifts just loans. Can't understand how baby presents are a loan but anyway. Just recently my family spent Christmas with her and Dad and it was great. Then They came to me for New Year for dinner. Whilst we were chatting my daughter (who's 5) went and got her money box of loose change to 'show off' to her nanny and grandad. Thought nothing of it. Anyway, I have received a phone call from my mother (2 weeks later) accusing my daughter of stealing her money and putting it in her money box and that she stole it from her Christmas Day! She said she knows exactly what has gone missing and it's been put in my daughters money box and she is now demanding it back. Now, I have been utterly devasted and have been crying for days. My daughter did NOT leave my mothers house with any money, I would have noticed her pockets being full (she's 5) . Myself and my DP have asked her did she bring back any pennies from nannies and up until today has said no (and We believe her). My kids have been brought up morally. The thing which is really upsetting is she is telling other family my daughters a thief. I just find it utterly unbelievable. My dp is devasted too and now all my children do not want to see their nanny, I don't blame them, they do not want to be accused of stealing. All this because my daughter showed her money box. How has it gone from a Xmas/New Years meal .... To this?
one family member has said ignore it, she's odd... But I just can't. The stigmas now attached is just awful. My sister has said go and talk to her... There is no point, I'm not going to try and reason with her, I won't win anyway. I have nothing to 'reason' with mum over my daughter no their. So I'm left with no choice, my own family no longer want to see her, or have her in our home. My dp has made a decision that non of our children will visit her again until she apologises (which will never happen). Now, the next awful thing is, these people I've cried to will repeat it to mum, and my mum will attack me over it because I've complained and cried over what she said. Basically she's right I'm wrong. The whole family is falling apart. Right now I can't bear to even look at mum.
I'm so sad. I cry. I can't comprehend what's happened. I just don't know what to think or do.
Thank you
Kay
one family member has said ignore it, she's odd... But I just can't. The stigmas now attached is just awful. My sister has said go and talk to her... There is no point, I'm not going to try and reason with her, I won't win anyway. I have nothing to 'reason' with mum over my daughter no their. So I'm left with no choice, my own family no longer want to see her, or have her in our home. My dp has made a decision that non of our children will visit her again until she apologises (which will never happen). Now, the next awful thing is, these people I've cried to will repeat it to mum, and my mum will attack me over it because I've complained and cried over what she said. Basically she's right I'm wrong. The whole family is falling apart. Right now I can't bear to even look at mum.
I'm so sad. I cry. I can't comprehend what's happened. I just don't know what to think or do.
Thank you
Kay