I just wanted to share my experience in case it helps others. I've been caring for my very elderly frail mum who has middle stage alzheimers. I felt like I was becoming a horrible angry bitter person due to mum's paranoid delusions, I'd had enough. Hardened my heart, joined a gym, am starting a pt job, will book a holiday soon, & carers have started twice per day. Mum cried when I told her, hated the idea of 'strangers' & there have certainly been quite a few for her to meet. It's been really positive, they've all been so kind to me as well as mum (Age UK). At first I was hovering & twittering showing them where everything was & going into great detail about mum's routines until one kindly but firmly told me to relax & let them get on with it! It's actually encouraged mum to be more independent, she's a bit embarassed about them doing personal care so she's managed to get herself up in the morning a couple of times. She's very sweet 'host mode' with them so far, I feel like I've got my life back. I've accepted that whilst I love her, I don't like her now, & that's OK. Luckily I have finance LPA & mum has the means to self-fund. Hope this might help someone else.
Accepted help
- Thread starter TraceyK
- Start date
Hello @TraceyK
Im so pleased to hear that you have found carers coming in to be a positive experience.
My OH has carers coming in too and like your mum he didnt want "strangers" coming in and thought he could do everything himself anyway. However, he has got to know the carers and no longer considers them "strangers" and I think rather looks forward to them coming. They have been a godsend to me, allowing me some space and decreasing my work load. So I too have found carers to be a very positive thing
Im so pleased to hear that you have found carers coming in to be a positive experience.
My OH has carers coming in too and like your mum he didnt want "strangers" coming in and thought he could do everything himself anyway. However, he has got to know the carers and no longer considers them "strangers" and I think rather looks forward to them coming. They have been a godsend to me, allowing me some space and decreasing my work load. So I too have found carers to be a very positive thing
It is such a relief when they accept the help. We have started to discuss with my dad that he may want extra "support", we have to sew the seed and then he comes back to us as if its his idea - whatever works!
Well done and enjoy the time you will gain back for yourself!
Jxx
Well done and enjoy the time you will gain back for yourself!
Jxx
