New care home- Bad anger

[R&A]

My Nan, has rapidly gone down hill after being diagnosed with the illness, and my mum and her brother was full time carers for her in her home as she had good neighbours who would also check in on her first thing and last thing. But a few weeks ago she started wondering the streets trying too get the bus at 10 at night and trying to go to her local shop- any many other things had gone worse where they both decided she needed full time care in a home, as they both was looking ill and stressed with the phone calls at all hours my nan would put on us mainly shouting for leaving the house with out her knowing (allways me as she thinks im still 5...Im not im 24!!)

This new home she liked she calmed down, she let them help her wash and everything... but this lasted two days... she now has slapped a carer refuses to go to sleep at night walks in other peoples rooms to try and escape, she has been caught trying too climb the fence.. she keeps shouting and screaming and the care home cant cope with this, and we dont really want her in a nursing home, but is this the next step?

My poor mum is so embrassed she thinks the carers in the home are judging her for my nans poor behaviour- She knows she dosent mean too act soo angry but its awful!

Has anyone had trouble with care or anyone with this much anger?!

 

[Katrine]

Hi R&A, what a scary time for you all. When someone's behaviour changes so rapidly, the advice here on TP is always to check for a medical problem first, rather than assuming a permanent state of agitation will inevitably persist. Urine infections (UTIs) and constipation cause havoc with the elderly. I would ask the CH to get a urine sample tested and to speak to the GP today for advice.

 

[AlsoConfused]

It probably is a UTI because the first 2 days seemed to go well ....

Sometimes a general review of medication can help; it's worth raising this issue with the GP.

 

[Charlyparly]

Not uncommon for behaviour to be a little changeable for that initial period of settling in but staff at the home should be familiar with / know how to handle this as a rule. It's always difficult getting to know new people (works both ways) and until we do, it can be a case of trial and error with extra time and care taken to work out what's best for the person concerned.

I would have thought the home will persevere but it does surprise me that they've said they “can't cope” because of what's gone on. The right approach is nearly always the key to everything and I strongly believe that nine times out of ten, aggression and behavioural problems can be remedied just through the right approach from staff.

If the home says it cannot cope so early on, it might not be a bad thing to be considering possible alternatives in the meantime just in case things don't settle.

 

[copsham]

"... nd we dont really want her in a nursing home, but is this the next step?"

If she has a UTI and is treated I guess to might settle down. If not do not worry if she is assessed as needing a nursing home. My mothers nursing home is excellent, she is settled and 99% of the time I am happy with it. Obviously it is a matter of choosing the right one.

It sounds a really stressful time for you all. Best wishes for the next step.