Coronation Street

[daughter]

To Gayle: Thanks, I reckon it may get busier after tonight then.

To everyone else: Just thought I'd mention that today on ITV Teletext Page 116, Tina Baker says: "I'm glad Corrie bosses have decided not to drag out Mike Baldwin's demise. I'm finding the scenes heart-rendering..."

I realise no one wants to watch upsetting scenes, but after watching it happening over years and years to my Dad I now realise he should have been fitted with an 'off' button.

 

[zan]

I know what you mean, Hazel , but I don,t think we'd be able to press it. In the summer I said to my husband why doesn't some physical problem come and relieve people when the Alzheimers hits hard and take them before the suffering gets too bad. That was a month or two before Dad was diagnosed with the cancer. Now we are at the point where it will be a very very short time before Dad's 'Off button' is turned off naturally. If I had to press a button to do this I couldn't. I would grab the controls from anyone who had them and tape over the off button so no-one could press it. What I want is a rewind button. I want to rewind to a time, not too long ago, when on a Friday I would pick my Mum up in the morning, we'd call somewhere ( shopping quite often), then she'd come to my house for the afternoon. Dad would be at home gardening, then he'd pick up the kids and bring them here and we'd all have tea together. Now it's all memories. Such a simple routine but I wish we could have it back. Zan

 

[daughter]

Zan - sorry about my sarcastic rant.

What I want is a rewind button.

- so true, I have very similar memories of simple happy times... {{{hugs}}}

 

[connie]

Rewind button

Please, please can I have a 'rewind' button too. We still try to enjoy as much as we can, and for that I am grateful that we can. But oh for a majic button - ah well, will just have to get out the phot's again, and talk of old times.

Love to all, Connie

 

[Amy]

Hiya Zan,
Thinking of you.
Love,
Amy

 

[Brucie]

Please, please can I have a 'rewind' button too

Just a Pause button would do...anything to stop the inexorableness. Though with Jan, it would be heartless to pause her now.

Rewind would be fantastic though. I have just collected a video that has been made from some of our early holidays when I was using an 8mm cine camera. That's the closest to rewind I can get.

 

[Norman]

Connie
when you find out where to get a rewind button please let me know.
How I wish that I could go back to some of the so called highlights in our lives,when Peg should have been aware and enjoyed them,with me.
I did ejoy them up to a point, but how I wish it had been we, and not just me.
Norman

 

[zan]

I'm sure you weren't being sarcastic Hazel. We all feel like this at some time. I'm just feeling so low at the moment. The Macmillan nurse saw Dad today and it seems we are at the stage of having a few days left. The nurse who was looking after Dad today was so lovely. She is on over the weekend so I know that someone is there who really cares. It may be too late to move to the local hospice as it would distresss Dad more probably than he would benefit, but if a side ward becomes available he may be able to move into that. His drugs have been altered in his pump and he seemed more settled today. He hasn't really spoke much but he did say the word 'exhausted' yesterday. It's just a very sad time. Zan

 

[connie]

Zan, thinking about you. Hugs, Connie

 

[noelphobic]

Zan,

wish there was something I could say or do to help. Hang on in there as best you can.

 

[barker]

Direct Payments

Can anyone explain direct payments to me. I have had an initial carers assessment, but am now more confused than before.

The interviewer just kept insisting that we needed a financial assessment, but as we are way over the amount allowed before you need to be self-funding, I didn't see the point (I know certain expenses can be set against income).

I understand that we would be liable to the first £55 per week charge for any care, which is fair enough, but where do the direct payments come in? Are these after the £55 and what sort of amount is likely to be awarded? Basically it is only a sitting service that is required right now.

If anyone could help I would be most grateful.

 

[zan]

My fingers are aching but I'll keep hanging on. Thanks to all. love Zan

 

[Sandy]

Dear Zan,

My thoughts are with you at this difficult time. At least you know that your father is getting the care that he needs to be kept as comfortable as possible.

Its so hard to imagine what you're going though at the moment. In some ways, hearing that word "exhausted" might make what is to follow a tiny, tiny bit easier to accept - knowing that your father had fought illness for such a long time and that soon he would have to fight no longer.

Take care,

Sandy

 

[zan]

Dear Sandy, That's true. He looked after my Mum for a long time too and I think that he just wants to be with her, so I suppose that thought, in a strange way will help me too. Zan

 

[Norman]

Barker
have look at this.
http://www.alzheimers.org.uk/After_diagnosis/Sorting_out_your_money/info_directpayments.htm.
Come back if you need
Norman

 

[nikita]

live for today

sorry to hear people are having a difficult time, gran was cremated on thursday at a lovely service what touched me the most was a husband of a fellow resident from grans home attended her funeral he said he had gotten to know her quite well. i am going to live each day as if you have money it only goes to pay your nursing home bills awaiting final bill for gran about 19,000 and apparantly interest is added until paid, what a waste of doing without for years on that note im off to the pub take care all

 

[connie]

Nikita, thinking of you. Take care of yourself, and take some time out to enjoy life while you can.

Like your new philosophy. Love Connie

 

[Lila13]

I am sorry about your gran, Nikita.

But isn't it gran herself who has to pay (or rather, her estate), or do relatives have to pay for those who have died in debt?

Lila

sorry to hear people are having a difficult time, gran was cremated on thursday at a lovely service what touched me the most was a husband of a fellow resident from grans home attended her funeral he said he had gotten to know her quite well. i am going to live each day as if you have money it only goes to pay your nursing home bills awaiting final bill for gran about 19,000 and apparantly interest is added until paid, what a waste of doing without for years on that note im off to the pub take care all

 

[noelphobic]

I am sorry about your gran, Nikita.

But isn't it gran herself who has to pay (or rather, her estate), or do relatives have to pay for those who have died in debt?

Lila

I'm not sure about Nikita' s situation but my mum is in a nursing home. Her house has not yet been sold but the Local Authority have placed a charge on the property. This means that they pay towards her nursing home fees and we get sent regular statements to show how much is owed - about £15k at the moment I believe. Interest is not accrued on this debt but if the house is not sold within 56 days of my mum's death then interest will start to accrue. However, I am hoping that at some point we will get fully funded nhs care, possibly retrospective as well, in which case the debt would be reduced or cancelled altogether.

We do not intend to sell her house at this time because when we do the fees will increase by £125 per week, piling injustice upon injustice!

If someone dies 'in debt' then the money does come from their estate. However, if there is no money there then the debt normally dies with the person. Obviously debts have to be paid before any legacies/bequests are.

 

[noelphobic]

Direct Payments

Can anyone explain direct payments to me. I have had an initial carers assessment, but am now more confused than before.

The interviewer just kept insisting that we needed a financial assessment, but as we are way over the amount allowed before you need to be self-funding, I didn't see the point (I know certain expenses can be set against income).

I understand that we would be liable to the first £55 per week charge for any care, which is fair enough, but where do the direct payments come in? Are these after the £55 and what sort of amount is likely to be awarded? Basically it is only a sitting service that is required right now.

If anyone could help I would be most grateful.

Your question seems to have got lost among the others and you don't seem to have had any replies.

I don't have any personal experience of Direct Payments but there is a fact sheet on the Alzheimers site about it

http://www.alzheimers.org.uk/After_diagnosis/Sorting_out_your_money/info_directpayments.htm

I hope this is of some help. Maybe there are others here who have experience who can give some specific advice if this doesn't answer your questions.