Claire,
No, that’s not it. And no it’s definitely not rubbish. I’m sad for you that this had to be your first post on TP, but I do understand the pain that you are feeling.
Your Mum will live on in you, and in your memories of her and of the life you shared.
I lost my Mum when I was 27. She left us all when she was 60, so a mere 12 years older than your Mum. Nothing to do with dementia.
That empty hole is still there, and will be there forever and a day. Because, like you and like most of us, I only had one Mum. One very special Mum. And that’s how you must try to remember your Mum.
Forget the dementia. Don’t try to find other people who also had a Mum diagnosed with dementia at the age of 38. That is so rare, and you will spend valuable energy trying to find other rare persons who also had such a diagnosis at such a very young age.
You may need help from other sources, other counselling. Because it hurts like hell to lose your Mum when you are as young as you are. So, again I would say only that you must try to forget the dementia, and to:
Remember your Mum.
Take care,