MY wife is in hospital at the moment after a fall and a broken hip,She has started to refuse food when the staff or I try to feed her for the last few days but tonight in desperation I put a Jaffercake in her hand and she just ate it very slowly, so she got another and she ate that as well, anybody come across this before and any suggestions as to something I can put in her hand that she can manage that is not to messy so we don't upset the staff to much.
Food
- Thread starter RichardH
- Start date
Hello Richard H
any suggestions as to something I can put in her hand that she can manage that is not to messy so we don't upset the staff to much.
Richard
Do not worry about the staff. Just be glad you wife is eating
try anything, messy or not.
They do have a laundry in a hospital. And I am sure they have cleaned up much worse than chocolate
Barb & Ron X
any suggestions as to something I can put in her hand that she can manage that is not to messy so we don't upset the staff to much.
Richard
Do not worry about the staff. Just be glad you wife is eating
try anything, messy or not.
They do have a laundry in a hospital. And I am sure they have cleaned up much worse than chocolate
Barb & Ron X
Hi Richard,
I wouldn't worry about the staff in the hospital.
Have you tried a banana,or a bar of chocolate,something that is easily held and high calorie, There are also yogurts that come in a sort of tube (mainly for childrens lunch boxes) that you could give her and she could suck the contents out of. Dairylea dippers thing s like this.
I think I have just clicked on to what you mean about upseting the hospital staff as in bringing in your own food policy !! sorry Richard Iam a bit slow on the uptake
Ithink the things I have mentioned would be safe to take with you to feed to your wife.
Hope this helps xx
I wouldn't worry about the staff in the hospital.
Have you tried a banana,or a bar of chocolate,something that is easily held and high calorie, There are also yogurts that come in a sort of tube (mainly for childrens lunch boxes) that you could give her and she could suck the contents out of. Dairylea dippers thing s like this.
I think I have just clicked on to what you mean about upseting the hospital staff as in bringing in your own food policy !! sorry Richard Iam a bit slow on the uptake
Ithink the things I have mentioned would be safe to take with you to feed to your wife.
Hope this helps xx
Hi Richard
Barb is spot on - whatever she will accept, just give it!
Staff won't worry - if they do, that is tough!
More likely they will be glad you are helping.
I found stewed apple and custard went down well for my Jan. These days it is only chocolates that I can take her.
Barb is spot on - whatever she will accept, just give it!
Staff won't worry - if they do, that is tough!
More likely they will be glad you are helping.
I found stewed apple and custard went down well for my Jan. These days it is only chocolates that I can take her.
Hi Richard,
We have awful trouble getting mum to eat anything, but the other day I was trying to tempt her with forkfuls of cheesy mash, and she was refusing as usual. Suddenly she leant forward and picked up a piece of broccoli with her good hand and ate it. And then another piece. Quite amazing. She made quite a mess and hasn't repeated the experience since, but if your wife will eat anything at all by this method, the hospital should be grateful.
Give her whatever she likes and, like Brucie says, if they don't like it...tough. She's your wife and you know what is best for her.
Hope she picks up soon
Vonny xx
We have awful trouble getting mum to eat anything, but the other day I was trying to tempt her with forkfuls of cheesy mash, and she was refusing as usual. Suddenly she leant forward and picked up a piece of broccoli with her good hand and ate it. And then another piece. Quite amazing.
She made quite a mess and hasn't repeated the experience since, but if your wife will eat anything at all by this method, the hospital should be grateful.Give her whatever she likes and, like Brucie says, if they don't like it...tough. She's your wife and you know what is best for her.
Hope she picks up soon
Vonny xx
My first thought is b****r the staff. That's my second thought as well in fact. If she liked the Jaffa cakes maybe something that is fairly high density yet still soft might work. You want something that will hold together if you're talking about "in hand eating" as opposed to something that needs a spoon.
Hi Richard - I found the 'food policy' in hospital very difficult .... natural choice of healthy, soft finger for mum was a banana (which she loved) - the hospital were allowed to give their own from their kitchens but I couldn't take them in? I'm afraid rules around 'infection control' (for good reason in some respects - can't seem to be broken for dementia sufferers. What is a 'protected' mealtime for a non-dementia patient in a hospital is a vital time for visiting and helping out for others?)
Two 'tactics' I used if they help ... 1) bought a 'job lot' of small and cheap food containers (from a 'poundstore') and filled them daily with various titbits mum enjoyed from home ... together with taking my own teaspoons where needed - (mousse, soft chopped fruit, tiny rounds of tuna sandwiches with lots of mayo for moisture, prawns with lots of seasoning to tempt her tastebuds etc) ...... 2) stopped by the Hospital WRVS shop en route to the ward to buy 'soft caramel' chocolate or any other high calorie commerical goodie to tempt mum with which I figured I couldn't be challenged with as they were bought on hospital premises .....
When for whatever reason someone is not eating it is most important just to get ANY kind of calories in? (Other medical conditions like diabetes permitting). I wonder if this is a reaction to shock from the fall? But if you can ride the storm with Jaffa cakes until she is ready for other things again, so be it.
Love, Karen, x
Two 'tactics' I used if they help ... 1) bought a 'job lot' of small and cheap food containers (from a 'poundstore') and filled them daily with various titbits mum enjoyed from home ... together with taking my own teaspoons where needed - (mousse, soft chopped fruit, tiny rounds of tuna sandwiches with lots of mayo for moisture, prawns with lots of seasoning to tempt her tastebuds etc) ...... 2) stopped by the Hospital WRVS shop en route to the ward to buy 'soft caramel' chocolate or any other high calorie commerical goodie to tempt mum with which I figured I couldn't be challenged with as they were bought on hospital premises .....
When for whatever reason someone is not eating it is most important just to get ANY kind of calories in? (Other medical conditions like diabetes permitting). I wonder if this is a reaction to shock from the fall? But if you can ride the storm with Jaffa cakes until she is ready for other things again, so be it.
Love, Karen, x
Hi Richard,
Many people with dementia show a preference for sweet tastes, so the jaffa cakes were a good thing to try. Did your wife have preferences for sweet foods before her accident?
Also, foods that people can feed themselves are always a good idea. The Alzheimer's Society has a sheet on so-called 'finger-foods' which might give you some more ideas:
http://www.alzheimers.org.uk/site/scripts/documents_info.php?categoryID=200208&documentID=366
Also, this factsheet on care on a hospital ward:
http://alzheimers.org.uk/factsheet/477
mentions asking for help from the hopital dietician:
Take care,
Sandy
Many people with dementia show a preference for sweet tastes, so the jaffa cakes were a good thing to try. Did your wife have preferences for sweet foods before her accident?
Also, foods that people can feed themselves are always a good idea. The Alzheimer's Society has a sheet on so-called 'finger-foods' which might give you some more ideas:
http://www.alzheimers.org.uk/site/scripts/documents_info.php?categoryID=200208&documentID=366
Also, this factsheet on care on a hospital ward:
http://alzheimers.org.uk/factsheet/477
mentions asking for help from the hopital dietician:
Take care,
Sandy
For some reason my Dad refused all food in hospital. Perhaps because he always said NO if we asked what he wanted also.We then stopped asking, just gave him the food (which would then be eaten).
One day in hospital I found my Dad licking out a individual flora carton that he had hidden in his locker. That was heartbreaking, to see such a proud man reduced to that, he was so quiet and gentle he would never ever have rocked the boat.
Sorry but stuff the rules and regulations, if you don't get some food (sometimes any calories are good calories) in to your wife that she likes, she will be malnurioused.
Sunshine.. love and hugs
Helen
One day in hospital I found my Dad licking out a individual flora carton that he had hidden in his locker. That was heartbreaking, to see such a proud man reduced to that, he was so quiet and gentle he would never ever have rocked the boat.
Sorry but stuff the rules and regulations, if you don't get some food (sometimes any calories are good calories) in to your wife that she likes, she will be malnurioused.
Sunshine.. love and hugs
Helen
Hi all
Thank You all for you suggestions and good will, I am sorry I jumped in last night without introducing my self but I felt the situation was getting beyond me and I rarely need some advice,Just to up date you all, tonight she got Marmite solders a banana, and some Cheddars, so things are looking up.
Margaret has had dementia diagonised for the last 3 years but she has had rapid onset and at 66 she is reletavley young to be so advanced, she has been in long term care from November 08 and I was just starting to accept this when she broke her hip at the beginning of January and of course things didn't go well to the point where she is being assessed for "continuing care"tomorrow,so we will see how that goes.
thanks again and I am glad to have found you all
Richard
Without trying to put anymore on your plate, does it not seem that your wife is unusually young to have broken a hip? I'm wondering (and forgive me I don't know what is available on the NHS) whether she should be on some form of prescription bone building supplement.
While fractured hips may be part and parcel of dementia in the very elderly you don't hear so much about this being an issue with women of your wife's age. You may have already considered this, so if so, forgive me. It's just I think doctors can get so wrapped up in the primary problem (i.e. dementia) and forget about all the other stuff that comes along as an older woman. I think some of the things (screenings) that would normally be recommended for women of your wife's age might not be appropriate under the circumstances but maintaining her bone density would appear to be a positive.
While fractured hips may be part and parcel of dementia in the very elderly you don't hear so much about this being an issue with women of your wife's age. You may have already considered this, so if so, forgive me. It's just I think doctors can get so wrapped up in the primary problem (i.e. dementia) and forget about all the other stuff that comes along as an older woman. I think some of the things (screenings) that would normally be recommended for women of your wife's age might not be appropriate under the circumstances but maintaining her bone density would appear to be a positive.
Richard, no need for apologies or explanations ... rather I personally am delighted to come back to TP tonight and see your update (kicking myself why I never thought of Marmite soldiers years ago !!!! Absolutely well done ).
I do hope things continue to improve - well, as best they can, of course .....
Love, Karen, x
).I do hope things continue to improve - well, as best they can, of course .....
Love, Karen, x
Richard, welcome, everyone has given you great advice and I'd like to add a little to that. As your wife proceeds into further stages you will notice her going back and forth for a while. Normal foods to finger foods..etc. This happens as they start having more bad days.
When mom was in the hospital here (and I am in the US..so there is a difference) The nutritionist wanted to tell me what mom needed to eat and in the long run she agreed that I already knew what she was telling me. The changes she ordered did not take place until 3 days later. ( I was already taking in my own foods for mom as the hospital food she did not like) When mom was capable of feeding herself..albight the fact she could not use a fork or spoon anymore I just regressed us to the point of when my kids were learning to eat big people food. As she digressed I started using baby foods going backwards in the stages. I did this because of the nutritional value they give.
Sorry to jump ahead. Good luck and don't worry ..if all she wants is sweets then by golly she probably deserves it after all these years. You might also try sitting down with her and sharing your food. Mom was quite content to eat anything that my daughter or I would share with her.
HUGS
Nancy
When mom was in the hospital here (and I am in the US..so there is a difference) The nutritionist wanted to tell me what mom needed to eat and in the long run she agreed that I already knew what she was telling me. The changes she ordered did not take place until 3 days later. ( I was already taking in my own foods for mom as the hospital food she did not like) When mom was capable of feeding herself..albight the fact she could not use a fork or spoon anymore I just regressed us to the point of when my kids were learning to eat big people food. As she digressed I started using baby foods going backwards in the stages. I did this because of the nutritional value they give.
Sorry to jump ahead. Good luck and don't worry ..if all she wants is sweets then by golly she probably deserves it after all these years
. You might also try sitting down with her and sharing your food. Mom was quite content to eat anything that my daughter or I would share with her.HUGS
Nancy
Hi Richard, We had this problem with my dad in Blackpool Victoria,he had broken his femur, also just the week before told he had terminal cancer so he was already very ill and died 6wks later, dads problem was, because of his broken femur he was on the orthopiedic ward, they were not interested in how he felt with his cancer and told us in no uncertain terms, that they were there to fix bones, I think dad didn't eat for severall reasons, they never gave him his teeth, I would put them in for him and the next day he would be without again, they would bring in his food and 10mins later would take it away, other patiants told us they didn't even lift the lids to check if he'd eaten or not, nor did any member of staff talk to him or attempt to pass the time of day at all, dad never complained to them or us, had the other patiants not told us we would never have known.
As soon as we found out about his lack of care, we contacted the McMillan ward who had him transfered to a hospice within an hour.
I would say to you, you do whatever you need to do in the best interest of your wife, if she makes a mess she makes a mess, they will have to clean up, its part of there job, I am caring for my mother full time now and believe me, if she or any member of my family need to go into hospital I will be on the ball from day one, although our hospital where we live is very nice I have not heard complaints like the ones we had in Blackpool.
Good luck Lynn
As soon as we found out about his lack of care, we contacted the McMillan ward who had him transfered to a hospice within an hour.
I would say to you, you do whatever you need to do in the best interest of your wife, if she makes a mess she makes a mess, they will have to clean up, its part of there job, I am caring for my mother full time now and believe me, if she or any member of my family need to go into hospital I will be on the ball from day one, although our hospital where we live is very nice I have not heard complaints like the ones we had in Blackpool.
Good luck Lynn
