Had enough today.
- Thread starter jorgieporgie
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I'm the big round one at the front ow lady A it was so lovely meeting up after all the most intermit sad times we shared we laughed and chatted like we had nowen another all our lives I'm going to try to get as many of us as possable to meet up hopfully at Liverpool all ideas on a post card please lol rosy would you be able to steel away for a few hrs Molly and ladyA and hillybillys would you be able to come over ????
Sitting on the ward. Mum sleeping. Not sure if she's tired or had another stroke, but was very slurry when I came in. Woman hoovering the floor loudly. Staff at desk nearby plotting their holidays. There are some caring folk here, but some are not so good. So much noise. How can this be a good environment at any level for a sick person? The care is wrong. There seems much more focus on stuff that isn't actually care. Dreadful in my view. Hope mum makes it home eventually and doesn't die in this God-awful place.
Marnie I'm so sorry and disgusted. I know nursing staff are short handed, but your mum needing a drink is a basic requirement and plain neglect. Your mum deserves better so do you. You deserve to feel your mum is being well cared for when you aren't right by her side.
HD and Jorgie you're both very photogenic. I could shatter a camera lense!
Rosy I hope your mum has gained a little strength and is managing to eat a little more. Thinking about both of you.
I went in to see mum yesterday. It was not a great visit, but I may have to take responsibility for it. I may have over taxed her as we were playing dog dominoes (child's version with pictures of dogs rather than dots so easier) for a bit. Maybe it was too much, when it came to tea time and time for me to leave she flipped demanding to leave with me and sobbing. Mum refused to go into the dining room and refused to eat. It was suggested that I could sit in one of the lounge with her whilst she ate, she just shouted at the staff about how she wasn't eating there. The upshot was me staying until she calmed down, I left around 8pm. Mum reminded me how difficult she can be, she threw all the familiar accusations at me about abandoning her which I hadn't heard in weeks. Not things I particularly wanted to hear again, but as I say maybe it was my fault for over taxing or over stimulating her.
Within an hour of my getting home the ward rang mum had stumbled and slid down the wall in the dining room banging her head. A doctor was checking her over and mum was moaning as seeing the doctor was a waste of time as she was fine. Then the nurse made a mistake. He told me it was such a shame mum had taken this tumble as she had had such a good day up to then. I think my first word was hardly then I told him how difficult she had been.
This morning I called and as it happens got one of the deputy manager. Mum's OK, she slept well, has been assisted with showering and is pottering about. That's good, but since she is a deputy manager I told her I was unhappy about being told rubbish last night. Her first suggestion was maybe he meant she had had a good morning. So say that. Then she suggested I should tell the staff if mum was having a bad time. I told her numerous staff were aware she wasn't at her best and that she had refused her evening meal as she was agitated. At that point she ran out of excuses and said she would speak to the staff. I told her I don't want to make a huge issue out of it, but I don't want to be told inaccurate information just because it's what I'd want to hear.
As to PC Nursing Home I spoke with them yesterday. They rang the family of the person ahead of mum on the waiting list to see whether they were still interested in placing their family member in PC, but hadn't heard back from them so we are still waiting to see what happens. Quite ironic, they took mum off their waiting list for no reason, yet the family of this other person aren't getting back to them, but they have to be given a chance to do so. Huge sigh!!!
To finish my post on a lighter note we spent a while yesterday looking for a screw driver. Mum wanted it to take the locks off doors. Just shows mum still has some planning ability left. Disable the locks and get out. Trust mum. X
HD and Jorgie you're both very photogenic. I could shatter a camera lense!
Rosy I hope your mum has gained a little strength and is managing to eat a little more. Thinking about both of you.
I went in to see mum yesterday. It was not a great visit, but I may have to take responsibility for it. I may have over taxed her as we were playing dog dominoes (child's version with pictures of dogs rather than dots so easier) for a bit. Maybe it was too much, when it came to tea time and time for me to leave she flipped demanding to leave with me and sobbing. Mum refused to go into the dining room and refused to eat. It was suggested that I could sit in one of the lounge with her whilst she ate, she just shouted at the staff about how she wasn't eating there. The upshot was me staying until she calmed down, I left around 8pm. Mum reminded me how difficult she can be, she threw all the familiar accusations at me about abandoning her which I hadn't heard in weeks. Not things I particularly wanted to hear again, but as I say maybe it was my fault for over taxing or over stimulating her.
Within an hour of my getting home the ward rang mum had stumbled and slid down the wall in the dining room banging her head. A doctor was checking her over and mum was moaning as seeing the doctor was a waste of time as she was fine. Then the nurse made a mistake. He told me it was such a shame mum had taken this tumble as she had had such a good day up to then. I think my first word was hardly then I told him how difficult she had been.
This morning I called and as it happens got one of the deputy manager. Mum's OK, she slept well, has been assisted with showering and is pottering about. That's good, but since she is a deputy manager I told her I was unhappy about being told rubbish last night. Her first suggestion was maybe he meant she had had a good morning. So say that. Then she suggested I should tell the staff if mum was having a bad time. I told her numerous staff were aware she wasn't at her best and that she had refused her evening meal as she was agitated. At that point she ran out of excuses and said she would speak to the staff. I told her I don't want to make a huge issue out of it, but I don't want to be told inaccurate information just because it's what I'd want to hear.
As to PC Nursing Home I spoke with them yesterday. They rang the family of the person ahead of mum on the waiting list to see whether they were still interested in placing their family member in PC, but hadn't heard back from them so we are still waiting to see what happens. Quite ironic, they took mum off their waiting list for no reason, yet the family of this other person aren't getting back to them, but they have to be given a chance to do so. Huge sigh!!!
To finish my post on a lighter note we spent a while yesterday looking for a screw driver. Mum wanted it to take the locks off doors. Just shows mum still has some planning ability left. Disable the locks and get out. Trust mum. X
Marnie I'm sorry you've posted whilst I was drafting. I pray your mum hasn't had another stroke. The staff sound useless (sorry to be blunt). There must be so many better things for them to do!
My own experience is that too many nursing staff are too caught up in chatting or their mobile phones to pay attention to their actual duties. I know it's unfair to generalise, but it doesn't fill you with faith in their care of our loved ones. X
My own experience is that too many nursing staff are too caught up in chatting or their mobile phones to pay attention to their actual duties. I know it's unfair to generalise, but it doesn't fill you with faith in their care of our loved ones. X
Oh, I doubt I would. I've had a mahoosive house repair bill, the same week as the house insurance renewal (€256), the annual car tax bill of €200, and my car has just cost me over €500 in repairs, servicing & timing belt replacement! And we have the Irish Meet Up in September.
Marnie, Hope your mum does better today. It's awful the way you just have to be there, watching over loved ones, when they should be safe and cared for in hospital!
Yesterday I asked one of the 'good' nurses how to make a formal complaint (specifically about them not paying attention to mum's build up of fluid). Today one of the other staff nurses came up to me and said he understood I had some concerns. At least they are now aware that I am looking out for mum and won't put up with shoddy care.
There was another issue yesterday where an agency nurse was forcing mum to swallow whole pills. I told her that she was on pureed food, but she continued. Told the staff nurse about that too this morning and he said that was wrong. I've been told to either crush and mix, or break out the capsule contents into the gloop she has to drink.
Mum seems to have retained bowel control. A few times she has said she needs to go and is finally going in a bed pan, even though she insists she can walk to the toilet! She has been catheterized since admission. I think some of that is for their convenience, but for now I'm happy as she's immobile and tired. The bed pan looks so uncomfortable! A few people have said the catheter may be permanent, I accept that may be the case, but I don't accept them not even trying to see if mum can wee for herself. I guess it's all down to mobility. If I can mobilise her at home then surely we can keep her in pad or pull ups.
On Monday morning the hospital OT/physio are coming to the house to assess for equipment and on Wed someone from our care agency is coming to the hospital to reassess mum.
Life is about to change very dramatically.
There was another issue yesterday where an agency nurse was forcing mum to swallow whole pills. I told her that she was on pureed food, but she continued. Told the staff nurse about that too this morning and he said that was wrong. I've been told to either crush and mix, or break out the capsule contents into the gloop she has to drink.
Mum seems to have retained bowel control. A few times she has said she needs to go and is finally going in a bed pan, even though she insists she can walk to the toilet! She has been catheterized since admission. I think some of that is for their convenience, but for now I'm happy as she's immobile and tired. The bed pan looks so uncomfortable! A few people have said the catheter may be permanent, I accept that may be the case, but I don't accept them not even trying to see if mum can wee for herself. I guess it's all down to mobility. If I can mobilise her at home then surely we can keep her in pad or pull ups.
On Monday morning the hospital OT/physio are coming to the house to assess for equipment and on Wed someone from our care agency is coming to the hospital to reassess mum.
Life is about to change very dramatically.
Marnie what a disgrace I'd be taking pics of staff sitting doing that and be on the heels of pals with mahoosive complaints the use of mobiles by staff is not on never mind booking hols and there is the utterly disgraceful fact that your dear mum isn't getting the basics in care a drink of water grrrrrr so angry 4 you sorry not meaning in winding you up
Lavender feel for you aswell why do ppl lie I hate lifts
Ow dear LadyA that's a lot of expense when is the September meet and who is going I didn't know about that one x
Ow and lavender better get practising your smile 4 the photos your not getting out of this
We off to whitby again today to buy crabs nomnomnom hope you all have a sunny day xxx
Lavender feel for you aswell why do ppl lie I hate lifts
Ow dear LadyA that's a lot of expense when is the September meet and who is going I didn't know about that one x
Ow and lavender better get practising your smile 4 the photos your not getting out of this
We off to whitby again today to buy crabs nomnomnom hope you all have a sunny day xxx
Sorry marnie our posts crossed over let's hope your able to get your dear mum hone soon the stress 4 you must be exhausting xxxhugsxxx
I forgot to say how lovely that HD and JP have met up, lovely pic. You'll all meet me one day, I promise!
Lavender - it's awful when info between staff is so inconsistent. It's downright dangerous in some cases. I hate having to keep watch over mum the whole time, but it seems to be the only way to make sure she's safe.
Lavender - it's awful when info between staff is so inconsistent. It's downright dangerous in some cases. I hate having to keep watch over mum the whole time, but it seems to be the only way to make sure she's safe.
Hello strangers
Thanks for your messages. I am alive I had a holiday. We went to Dubai to the hotel we went to every year so were throughly looked after.
Back to reality now and felt weird coming home to no dad. I used to call him when I landed he'd meet me and carry my case and make a fuss and do all my washing.
Hit me when I came back to not having him (not the washing part of course)
Solicitors done their work so a hefty bill to pay now.
Looking round the house there is work needing doing like cracks in walls chipped paint and lots of dad's old clothes and bits I bought to try and help him.
Hope you are all ok and not too many dramas
Having a fed up day. 3 months today dad passed away Xx
Thanks for your messages. I am alive I had a holiday. We went to Dubai to the hotel we went to every year so were throughly looked after.
Back to reality now and felt weird coming home to no dad. I used to call him when I landed he'd meet me and carry my case and make a fuss and do all my washing.
Hit me when I came back to not having him (not the washing part of course)
Solicitors done their work so a hefty bill to pay now.
Looking round the house there is work needing doing like cracks in walls chipped paint and lots of dad's old clothes and bits I bought to try and help him.
Hope you are all ok and not too many dramas
Having a fed up day. 3 months today dad passed away Xx
I cannot believe it's 3 months Worrier, that's gone past on the blink of an eye. I'm glad you managed to get away and were well looked after, just what you needed, but I can understand that returning home must have felt very strange.
Be kind to yourself today, the myriad of jobs will wait a while yet. Xxx
Be kind to yourself today, the myriad of jobs will wait a while yet. Xxx
Evening Everyone,
Glad you had your well deserved holiday Worrier, wow Dubai you lucky girl.
God time passes without us knowing. Three Months as soon passed, it will be a year since Mum passed in October and I can not believe it too.
Harryd glad you got your fish and chips in Whitby, they are unbeatable. Hope you got your crab too.
I have been out all day at York maze with my Daughter and grandchildren, I am on my last legs now worn out. It was a great day and the rain only started on our way home so that was good. Plenty to do there and the kids loved it. We even came home with fresh picked corn on the cob from the maze.
Oh Lavender and the saga still goes on. and for you too Marnie extra hugs to you both xx
Rosy hope the weekend is calm for you and your Mum.
Hope everyone else is ok and having a manageable weekend.
Molly hugs xx
Glad you had your well deserved holiday Worrier, wow Dubai you lucky girl.
God time passes without us knowing. Three Months as soon passed, it will be a year since Mum passed in October and I can not believe it too.
Harryd glad you got your fish and chips in Whitby, they are unbeatable. Hope you got your crab too.
I have been out all day at York maze with my Daughter and grandchildren, I am on my last legs now worn out. It was a great day and the rain only started on our way home so that was good. Plenty to do there and the kids loved it. We even came home with fresh picked corn on the cob from the maze.
Oh Lavender and the saga still goes on.
and for you too Marnie extra hugs to you both xxRosy hope the weekend is calm for you and your Mum.
Hope everyone else is ok and having a manageable weekend.
Molly hugs xx
What a great picture of you both Jorgie and Harry'D. I would certainly try and meet you in Liverpool if only for an hour. It's an hours drive there same on the train so if Mum is still sleeping as much I could have the carer for longer. It would be lovely to meet up, I'll just have to see at the time.xx
Marnie it really is awful to be so frightened to leave your Mum whilst you go home for some well deserved and needed rest. It would be great if you could take the time needed to recharge your batteries and know that your Mum was being well looked after which is what you would expect just so frustrating for you. I really do feel for you .xx
Lavender what can I say your poor Mum all you want to happen is to see your Mum settled who would have thought that would prove to be sooooo dificult xx
Mum still the same although I have noticed her speech is becoming much more mixed up now, very little is said correctly and Mum isn't understanding what myself or anyone else is saying for a lot of the time poor Mum. This afternoon she called me darling and then Charlie and then Kevin all within 5mins
Hope you all have a good weekend xx
Marnie it really is awful to be so frightened to leave your Mum whilst you go home for some well deserved and needed rest. It would be great if you could take the time needed to recharge your batteries and know that your Mum was being well looked after which is what you would expect just so frustrating for you. I really do feel for you .xx
Lavender what can I say your poor Mum all you want to happen is to see your Mum settled who would have thought that would prove to be sooooo dificult xx
Mum still the same although I have noticed her speech is becoming much more mixed up now, very little is said correctly and Mum isn't understanding what myself or anyone else is saying for a lot of the time poor Mum. This afternoon she called me darling and then Charlie and then Kevin all within 5mins
Hope you all have a good weekend xx
Morning Ladies,
Safe journey home today Harryd hope you enjoyed your time here Look forward to next meet up.
Oh Rosy it would be brilliant for you to be able to get over to us in Liverpool but if not I am sure we could plan another visit to Blackpool. Loving all these breaks
Marnie hope this weekend is better for you and your Mum gets home soon. Once in hospital it takes ages just to get discharged and like you say nothing much happens over the weekends, thinking about you.
Aisling do hope your ok not heard anything from you for a while, virtual hugs always sent. xx
I think a group hug is on the cards ((((hugs))))
Safe journey home today Harryd hope you enjoyed your time here
Look forward to next meet up.Oh Rosy it would be brilliant for you to be able to get over to us in Liverpool but if not I am sure we could plan another visit to Blackpool. Loving all these breaks
Marnie hope this weekend is better for you and your Mum gets home soon. Once in hospital it takes ages just to get discharged and like you say nothing much happens over the weekends, thinking about you.
Aisling do hope your ok not heard anything from you for a while, virtual hugs always sent. xx
I think a group hug is on the cards ((((hugs))))
Oh dear! It's so difficult, isn't it? I remember when my mum broke her hip, she ended up in a six bed ward. She was the only one in the ward who didn't have dementia! She thought she'd go mad, between listening to constant shouting from one or two, and having to constantly use her call buzzer to alert the staff because someone didn't understand that their hip/knee was broken (and one man had had a leg amputated, but didn't understand that!) and were trying to get out of bed and go home!
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